


It the end it was always you

by takarazuka_rpf



Category: Takarazuka Revue RPF
Genre: Multi, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 16:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 50,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9332930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takarazuka_rpf/pseuds/takarazuka_rpf
Summary: Imagined, utterly, 100% fictional story of what post-taidan life would be like for Chigi and Miyu. Regrets are realised, feelings are realised, actions are realised - basically everything will be realised by everyone. It’s going to be a bit painful at the start, but there’ll be a happy ending to this story. Other people will also be making appearances, including OGs as well as some original characters.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure who will be reading this so I'm mostly writing this for myself. However, please do comment and tell me what you thought of it if there are people out there reading this. I'm not sure how long this fic is going to be but it will be long. Also, ratings may move up in future chapters. Thank you and hopefully enjoy!  
> Chigi = Sagiri Seina 早霧 せいな  
> Miyu = Sakihi Miyu 咲妃 みゆ  
> Mattsu = Misuzu Aki 未涼 亜希  
> Hitoko = Towaki Sea 永久輝 せあ,  
> Saki = Ayakaze Sakina 彩風 咲奈  
> Macchi = Machi Yuuka 真地 佑果

Chigi:

It's been 3 months since their taidan show and slowly Chigi is getting used to this new life. No more script readings, no more singing lessons, no more rehearsals and no more spending day-to-day with the Yukigumi kids. She had just recently moved back to her hometown where she has a temporary job of giving acting/singing lessons to kids from the middle school she went to. The children (as well as the teachers) are thrilled to have her, but of course they would be, this used to be the top star of Takarazuka!

Chigi is honoured to have the job of introducing the World of Entertainment to the next generation. But the most important reason for accepting this job is to gain some time in figuring out how she wants to move forward now: an ordinary life or to carry on in the entertainment business?

On one hand she wants to dance and sing like she always have and loved but on the other, she wants something she's always longed for - a family. A family of her own whom she can love and cherish and share the rest of her life with. However, in this family life, she does not see any room for camera crews, spending nights in hotels to attend varieties shows or to miss family occasions for filming purposes. She still have lots to think about but not too much time as the contract offer she had received for an up-coming movie ends in a few months. The agency tells her that this could be her big debut into television and it'll be a great idea to accept it. Decisions, decisions.

In these 3 months, she's being in contact with the other OGs but every conversation had been about congratulating her and what an awesome top star she had been etc etc. She hasn't yet had the chance of getting into any deeper conversations about how to handle post-taka(zuka) life yet. However, she needn't to worry much about that as her schedule is still full of reunions and meet-ups with a lunch coming up with Mattsu soon who is visiting from the UK. That lunch she's particularly looking forward to as there are certain subjects she'd like to talk about, subjects Mattsu has dealt with. Anyway, that's still in a few days’ time. Now all she wants to do is to continue with this quite, uneventful life she has and is currently content with. Chigi falls back onto her sofa and turns on the TV in her living room. Immediately, she sees the face of a woman she's too familiar with - Sakihi Miyu. Her heart skips a beat.

* * *

 

Miyu:

Miyu has never felt so lonely in her whole life. Sitting in the hotel room by herself alone with her thoughts is something she does a lot these days. She has become the treasure of her entertainment agency with endless TV show contracts and commercial offers with lots of money rolling in. Don’t get her wrong, she doesn't mind it, in fact she thoroughly enjoys the new life she has now. She’s learnt so many more things and had the chance to meet people whom she had admired ever since she was a child. Every day is busy and that's the only problem. She doesn't have the chance or the time to catch up with family and old friends, friends with whom she grew up with in Takarazuka. She misses them so, so much. Macchi, Reiko, Daimon and of course, Her.

Currently she has 2 phones, one for work and one for her personal life. Her work phone is always alive and buzzing with emails and text messages from directors and her agency wanting her to be in their next projects. It seems like the TV industry saw something in her looks and personality that would make her popular amongst the public. And they were right. She is HUGE. Eventhough her fanclub from her Takarazuka days has disbanded, it seems like a new one has formed to follow her now. Miyu is super grateful for this, she can’t believe what the world has offered her and how it keeps on being kind to her. All she can do to repay this is to give the best she can offer into her future projects. She is determined to work hard to not disappoint her fans.

*Knock knock* Miyu stands up from the corner of her bed and opens her hotel room door.

‘Miyu! My beautiful, talented Miyu!’ It’s her loud, boisterous personal assistant, MoMo, assigned to her by her agency. ‘How are we feeling today? Good?’

‘Not bad but-‘

‘Wonderful! We will be going in 5 so put on your coat and I’ll knock again later. See ya,’ her personal assistant then left the room and closed the door behind her. Before, her assistant interrupted her, Miyu wanted to say that she wasn't feeling too well today, probably due to the late-night filming sessions lately in the chilly evenings which made her come down with a cold. Miyu sighed and went to fetch both of her phones from the hotel room desk. When she picked them up, she heard something drop to the floor. It was a snow keyring she got a while ago when she went to the funfair with the rest of Yukigumi.

She picks it up and holds it close to her chest, trying to suppress the bittersweet memories emerging in her mind now.

* * *

 

Flashback:

(Chigi POV) Their final showing of Hoshiai Hitoyo has ended, Chigi and her Yukigumi kids has decided to go to the local funfair to celebrate. They had all arrived together in one coach however for some reason, right now, there is only her and Miyu in the crowd of people. ‘Where did they go?’ Chigi said under her breath. ‘I’m not sure,’ came a reply from Miyu. Seemed like Miyu had heard her. ‘Come on let’s go and find them’, and almost immediately Chigi started to walk through the crowd. Chigi didn't want any of her fans to spot her, especially with Miyu, just in case rumours start amongst the fans. ‘Chigi wait for me-,’ Chigi had been walking too fast so Miyu has been bumping into people trying to catch up with her. Chigi let out a sigh and grabbed the hand of the woman behind and continued walking.

(Miyu POV) Chigi’s hand was warm and soft around Miyu’s. This brings back memories in Miyu’s mind of Sports Day 2014 when Chigi also held her hand tightly before their big entrance. A sense of comfort and familiarity flowed through Miyu which made her lose concentration of the world around her. So when Chigi suddenly stopped, Miyu walked into Chigi’s back.

(Chigi POV) ‘There you guys are!’ Where the hell did you guys go?’ Chigi had spotted the rest of Yukigumi next to a candy floss stand while eating candy floss. ‘Well, here. We craved some candy floss.’ Said Saki. ‘All of you?’ asked Chigi unbelievingly, ‘yes?’ said Saki unconvincingly. ‘Well, you could have at least told us,’ said Chigi, ‘Miyu and I were searching for you guys for a while now.’

‘Well we thought you and Miyu may have wanted to spend some time together by yourselves,’ said Saki pointing to their still connected hands. Giggles came from the rest of Yukigumi standing before them. Chigi and Miyu both looked down and saw their intertwined fingers and then immediately jumped away from each other. They shared a shy and awkward look and Chigi cleared her throat and said, ‘Anyway, it’s getting late, I think we should probably go now.’ A few groans and noises of protest were heard and then Hitoko said, ‘One last ride pleaaaase, with all of us’. With the rest of Yukigumi agreeing and looking with pleading eyes at Chigi, Chigi said with a sigh, ‘fine alright, one last ride.’

‘Yeah!’

‘Hooray!’

‘Chigi is the best!’

‘So which one do you all wanna go on?’

‘That one!’ They said in unison while pointing to the Ferris wheel. Chigi with her woman’s intuition sensed Yukigumi was planning something and she didn't like it. Having said that, Chigi and the rest of Yukigumi made their way to the queue with Miyu and Chigi being at the front. A couple of minutes later, they were next up.

‘Alright next 2,’ said the operator. ‘Ehhhh, want do you mean? Only 2 people can go on there at one time?!’ Asked Chigi with a confused and shocked face. ‘Of course, well the sign does says _Couple’s Wheel_ ’. Chigi turned around to read the sign but noticed that the rest of Yukigumi, who were originally behind them, had mysteriously disappeared leaving just Miyu and herself. So that’s why they were so insistent with her and Miyu at the front! ‘Damn it! I’m gunna ki-‘

‘Well you going or not?’ Asked the operator slightly annoyed now that they’re holding up the queue. Before she can respond, she felt a hand around hers pulling her towards a pod.

‘Sorry for this disruption, we’ll get in,’ said Miyu. Chigi said nothing and stared disbelievingly into the back of Miyu’s head and followed her into the pod.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback continues on from last chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funfair fun

Flashback continued:

(Miyu POV) She has no idea where her courage came from but she led both herself and Chigi-san into the pod. Now she sees why it was called _Couples’ Wheel._ The inside had an ambiance of love and sweetness with two little benches facing each other. They even had to bend down to get in and when they sat down, it left personal space to be desired.

Their knees touched and they were able to see each other’s faces clearly if they wanted to. Which is what Miyu wanted to. God she could stare at that face for eternity. Once they were in and closed the door, the wheel started to move again and their pod shook a little. This took Miyu by surprise and she stabled herself by holding onto anything available which happens to be Chigi’s thighs. Blushing and saying strings of apologies Miyu immediately removed her hands and looked down into her own lap. For a few moments, none of them said anything as they were still adjusting to the situation they were in. Suddenly, Chigi-san broke the silence by clearing her throat.

(Chigi POV) ‘I’m definitely going to kill those kids! They’ll taste the consequences of messing with their top star.’

Miyu giggled.

‘What are you giggling at?’ Said Chigi looking at Miyu with wide eyes. ‘Nothing, it’s just usually you’re the one being mischievous but this time you got played by Saki and the others’. Miyu put her hand over her mouth trying to supress another laughter but failing. Chigi opened her mouth to argue but nothing came out so she closed it again.

‘Why do they always do this? They fully well know there’s nothing going on between us two yet they still play jokes on us like this.’ Chigi mumbled.

Miyu’s smile dropped a bit and looked out into the window.

‘The view is pretty isn’t it, Chigi-san could come again with the person she really likes in the future. Maybe then you’ll enjoy it more.’ Chigi can’t really make out Miyu’s expression as she can only see her side-profile. ‘Maybe Miyu could come as back as well, with the person she truly likes.’

‘It could be a double date then!’

‘Haha, yeah.’ Both let out a dry laugh but none of them found it funny. Chigi turned her head to enjoy the view with Miyu. Miyu was right, the sight before them was truly beautiful. Below them was a sea of light coming from the city and above them was a sky full of stars. From here they could see Tokyo tower and countless numbers of lit-up buildings.

All of the sudden the pod jolted and the wheel came to a stop. Both Miyu and Chigi turned their heads but when they turned back they were almost nose to nose. They stared intently into each other’s eyes and time seemed to have slowed down for both for them.

Chigi saw Miyu’s eyes clearly therefore she saw how dilated her pupils were becoming. Chigi knew the effect she had on Miyu but had always dismissed it as the normal behaviour of a musumeyaku towards an otokoyaku. She named this behaviour the Musumeyaku-Syndrome. Chigi thought that once they leave Takarazuka, Miyu will grow out of this Musumeyaku-syndrome and go on to get married like the many other OGs out there.

Chigi was also fully aware of the effect Miyu had on HER. But ever since the beginning, Chigi had somehow successfully convinced herself that this was no-entry territory and Chigimiyu will never happen in real-life. This is why she never bothered to tell anyone and had always denied any ‘relationship’ between herself and Miyu other than friendship. Chigi had also avoided doing anything in private with just them two because she did not want to disturb the peace she had created within herself and go back on her words. She knew things will not end well for either of them so it was best to maintain a distance. Having said this, in this moment now in time, Chigi did not turn away but maintained this proximity.

This time, just this one time, she’ll allow herself to lose herself and look a bit longer.

Her eyes trailed the features of Miyu’s face from her eyes to her nose to her mouth. Miyu was wearing her favourite lipstick colour- Cherry Red. The way she had put it on was flawless. It followed the border of her lips perfectly and emphasised its shape. They look so plump and kissable.

Chigi can feel herself getting closer and closer to Miyu and Miyu doesn't seem to be moving away. She can’t stop herself from tilting her head. Chigi can feel Miyu’s breathing and smelt her sweet yet intoxicating scent. She realised Miyu was wearing the perfume Chigi got for her birthday. Chigi then placed both of her hands on the bench Miyu was sitting on, entrapping Miyu’s body but really it was to stabilise herself.

It’ll be alright to kiss her right? I mean they do it all the time by accident during rehearsals anyway? It’ll be ok wouldn’t it? Miyu hasn't pushed her away yet so she’s ok with it right?

Suddenly a high pitched sound filled the air between them.

‘Sorry but there has being some technical difficulties so please wait 2 minutes for us to sort this out. Thank you for your patience.’ Turned out there was a small speakerphone in the pod as well.

(Miyu POV) Miyu’s mind was still processing the events that just occurred. Eh? Wait what just happened? Was Chigi-san about to kiss her?! Before that stupid operator decided to announce his presence. She looked over at Chigi-san who was now sitting back and was looking anywhere but Miyu. Miyu had never seen Chigi-san look so flustered before. So Chigi-san did actually try to kiss her?? Miyu has now the most confused expression on her face and probably can’t form any sort of sentence if you asked her to. The pod started to move again and they were off.

(Chigi POV) Chigi could kill herself right there and then. She can’t believe what she had nearly done! And now Miyu can’t stop staring at her. No, she has to say something to break this tension. ‘Umm’, she was finding it extremely difficult to find the words, ‘the people who built this thing didn't do a very good job did they?’ Chigi tried to laugh but failed miserably. ‘Y-ye-yes they did, haha,’ came the shaky reply from Miyu. Quick, think of something else!

‘So, um, I think I saw something on your face a minute ago, um I was about to get it off but um the operator obviously um interrupted, it may just have being a fluff or something….’

‘Really?! Is it still there,’ gasped Miyu.

‘Um no it’s not, you’re fine, I think it flew off somewhere’

‘Ah thank you for noticing Chigi-san’. Miyu trailed off and Chigi hopes what she said had done the trick. 

After that, the whole ride went by in complete silence. Both of them were lost at words or rather found it too awkward or too embarrassed to say anything to each other. Chigi can’t wait to get out and get her hands on those Yukigumi kids.

(Miyu POV) Once they got off, the intense atmosphere between them was still there. Chigi-san made sure that there was an arm’s distance between them. Then Miyu saw Saki and Macchi running towards them. Saki probably saw the fire in Chigi-san’s eyes because she started to run away instead and Chigi-san ran after her. However, Macchi came over and said ‘Lol sorry about that, Hitoko needed to go to the toilet so we had to take her there.’ That was obviously a lie.

‘Anyway, we got this for everyone in Yukigumi.’ Macchi handed a small snow-shaped keyring to Miyu and placed it in her hands.

‘Wah, thank you! It’s so pretty.’

‘I’ll give one to Chigi-san as well. Anyway how was your little date up in the air,’ said Machhi while wagging her eyebrows. Miyu blushed and said ‘it wasn’t a date,’ at least Miyu knows Chigi-san wouldn’t call it a date, ‘in fact you guys may have ticked off Chigi-san a bit too much this time… She must be tired from performing daily yet we’re still causing her this kind of trouble…’

‘Ok ok Yuumi-san, we’ll make sure we apologize. Anyway let’s get back to the coach, it’s too cold out here and I wanna sleep’. Miyu said nothing and followed Macchi back to the coach. When she got on, she noticed Chigi-san and Saki were already back. She looked at Chigi-san but Chigi-san was avoiding her gaze. She found her seat near the back with the other musumeyakus and sat down.

On the drive back, other than answering questions about her ‘date’ with le top-san, she was also trying to figure out some of the questions in her head as well. So did Chigi-san really try to kiss her? Of course not, Chigi-san said she saw something on her face that’s all. But she was sure Chigi-san was heading for her lips?

Unbeknownst to Miyu, on the other end of the coach, Chigi’s mind was also full of thoughts of Miyu and what happened on the _Couple’s Wheel_.

They never talked about the situation again and went back to how their interactions were like before. Somehow, both of them were glad about this as they did not want to mess up or lose what they already have with each other now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be back to current times.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chigi sees Miyu on TV and then a flashback

Miyu:

Holding back her tears, Miyu reattached the key ring to her private phone and put them in her bag. Whatever she's thinking, now's not the time. She looked at herself one last time in the mirror to compose herself and walked to the cupboard to put on her coat. 

*Knock knock* that must be her personal assistant, Miyu went to open the door.

'Good you're all ready! Let's go then.' Her personal assistant looked at her up and down and then started to head down the corridors. Miyu closed her hotel room door and followed behind.

She hated walking behind MoMo because she had always hated the way her personal assistant walked. MoMo looked as if she's on the catwalk all the time, with her head held high and legs crossing the other at the front. Sometimes, it feels like MoMo is the celebrity here and Miyu is her personal assistant. 

They waited for the elevator to arrive and they both stepped in. ‘So, are you all prepared for today then?' Asked her personal assistant. 'Yes, I think so, 'replied Miyu.

'So you know the things you have to say and not say.'

'Yes,' came a single reply from Miyu.

‘Good. Also, give me you work phone, I’ll need to reply to some messages.’ Miyu obediently handed over her work phone to MoMo. Her agency probably has something planned for her again.

The other thing Miyu hated was that she's not allowed to be herself anymore. Everything she says now on TV is scripted by her agency and for this live TV appearance that she's on her way to, she had memorised the things she needed to say. She is being invited to take part in a talk show to talk about her new TV project. She wonders if people from Yukigumi will be watching her…

Her new project is a Romantic drama starring herself as the lead with another male actor. She has to kiss her co-star but they have not filmed up to that stage yet. Her co-star was a high profile actor who had won many awards in Japan and well-known by overseas audiences as well. Therefore, it is a great honour for Miyu to be given the chance of starring alongside him. However, she was nervous about this kiss scene as she had never really kissed anybody before other than….

Anyway, she will do her best and capture her audiences’ attention as much as possible.

‘Haruto-kun (her co-star) is already on his way to the broadcasting station so we better hurry up as well,’ said MoMo while reading the text message on her phone. Miyu nodded in agreement and wondered how awful it would be to be late especially with so many important people waiting.  Once they entered the hotel lobby, Miyu can already hear people screaming her name.

‘MIYU-CHAN!’

‘YUUMI-CHAN!’

‘I LOVE YOU YUUMI-CHAN!’

It was her ever-growing number of fans who were being pushed back by security guards. Miyu is always overwhelmed by this as this is worldly different from the fans she had at Takarazuka. Miyu guessed this is something she’ll just have to get used to. MoMo and Miyu were safety escorted into the expensive black car waiting for them outside but immediately the fans swarmed the car and started to knock on her window. MoMo and Miyu were both a little terrified by this. When the car started to move, Miyu was worried that it might crush some the fans but fortunately the guards managed to get them out of the way.

They finally set off and had arrived on time to fix Miyu’s make-up in the dressing room ready to be on air live.

* * *

 

Chigi:

Eyes affixed to the TV screen, Chigi couldn’t look away. Looks like Miyu got herself another job. Chigi couldn't be happier for Miyu as she knew this girl had the talents to have a successful future ahead of her. She remembers Miyu telling her about the insecurities she had of working in the television business but obviously it looks like Miyu had taken Chigi’s advice.

* * *

 

Flashback:

(Chigi POV) After 3 hours of non-stop rehearsals for the re-showing of Hoshiai Hitoyo for February, it was finally time for a break and Chigi went to the side benches to grab a drink. From her bag she also grabbed a towel and started to wipe away the sweat that was on her forehead.

‘Umm Chigi-san, can I talk to you about something…’ Chigi turned around and saw Miyu standing there also looking a bit flushed from the intense rehearsal they just had.

‘Um sure, let’s sit down.’

Beside them a loud sound of laughter and screaming suddenly erupted, Chigi turned to see what was going on saw Saki straddling top of Shou tickling the life out of her while Shou tried to push her off. Hitoko and Macchi were also laughing their heads off. Chigi wasn’t sure what was going on but she could not hear Miyu above all this racket so she grabbed Miyu’s arm and led them into a quiet corner.

‘What is it Yuumi-chan? Are you not feeling well again? You know we should be looking after ourselves since we are both top sta-‘

‘No it’s not that Chigi-san, it’s just that…, it’s just that an entertainment agency contacted me yesterday saying that they would like to sign me…’

Oh. So this is what all of this is about.

‘Yuumi-chan good for you!’ Chigi patted her on the arms, ‘but what’s with the concerned face, shouldn’t you be happy.’

‘I am but… Chigi-san do you think I can do it? Do you think people will continue to support me after Takarazuka? I’m so used to performing on the stage but on television-‘

‘Miyu look at me.’ Chigi placed both of her arms on Miyu’s shoulders and waited for Miyu to look at her.

‘I believe Yuumi-chan can do it. I believe that if Yuumi-chan really sets her heart to do something, she will succeed. This is a challenge I want Miyu to accept and what is the harm in trying? If it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out.’ Miyu continued to listen intently.

‘In my opinion, and this is my honest opinion, you are possibly one of the most talented revue members in the whole company. Acting, dancing, singing, you have it all. If anyone could tackle the TV industry, it is you. So I say go for it!’ Chigi-san had said this the best she could. However, during it she tried not to get teary eyed because for some reason the thought of leaving Takarazuka had never seemed so real and close.

Suddenly she felt Miyu arms snake around her waist pulling her into a warm embrace while tucking her face into the crook of Chigi’s neck. This had taken Chigi by surprise and she stiffened a bit.

‘Thank you Chigi-san. I will remember the words you just said.’ Chigi felt moisture on her skin, Miyu is probably crying. ‘In the future Chigi-san will continue to support me right? Chigi-san will continue to look out for me?’

Chigi was lost at words because will she though? Would it be too painful to see the woman she’s fallen in love with playing family or kissing some guy on her screen. Would Miyu even care about what Chigi thinks in the future?

‘I… Of course I will. I will become Miyu’s biggest fan.’ Chigi said softly. At the moment this is what Miyu needed to hear. Chigi wanted Miyu to have the reassurance as she did not want Miyu to worry. Eventhough Chigi refuses to confess to Miyu, Chigi shows her love for Miyu in a different way.

‘Thank you Chigi-san, you’re the best.’ Miyu pull Chigi in a bit closer and Chigi can feel the smile on Miyu’s face.

Then out of nowhere Chigi heard a wolf whistle coming from somewhere in the room. It was coming from Saki, Hitoko and Macchi who were all giggling and looking like 3 year-olds. Shou was standing next to them mouthing the word ‘sorry’ to Chigi. Chigi is going to miss these kids when she leaves.

‘Come on let’s get back to rehearsals, we’re letting Saki and the others’ imaginations run wild here and we don't want that to happen do we?’ Chuckled Chigi and Miyu nodded at that.

‘Let’s do our best in our remaining days and show the world what Yukigumi is all about.’

‘ _Hai_! With Chigi-san leading us, we can do anything!’ Chigi and Miyu gave each other one last smile and went back to rehearsals.

* * *

 

Chigi:

Chigi smiled to herself while remembering the nostalgic memory. It seemed like such a long time ago and everything she predicted for Miyu came true. She was truly proud.

Anyway on her television screen now, Miyu looked sweet and pure as usual while wearing a light pink dress with a floral pattern. Her whole outfit matched her personality which brought a smile to Chigi’s face.

The presenter is currently interviewing Miyu and a handsome man (presumably her co-star) and they are talking about their new up-coming TV drama. The man was first to speak and said something about his character but Chigi wasn’t paying attention as her concentration was on the woman standing next to him. She hadn’t seen Miyu for nearly 2 months now. The last time she saw Miyu was when they had a reunion with the rest of Yukigumi where they had a meal and a few drinks. But after that, Chigi and Miyu never really contacted each other as they both knew how busy each other had become. Now it’s Miyu’s turn to be interviewed and Chigi listened intently to the TV.

‘So Yuumi-chan, tell us a little bit about your character,’ asked the presenter.

‘ _Hai_! So in our new drama I play….’

Chigi started to tune out and focused on the way Miyu’s lips moved. When Miyu spoke she always had a little smile on her face and her eyes sparkled like jewels. Her voice was meek but sweet and soft which made listening to her talking an enjoyment. Chigi wanted to say _Ganbatte!_ to Miyu but unfortunately there was a TV screen separating them. For some reason, Chigi feels like Miyu didn’t belong to her anymore like she used to in Takarazuka, instead now she belongs to the public and her new fans.

Just thinking about this pulls her heart-strings as the thing she wants to do the most if to have Miyu for herself and to confess the feelings Chigi had developed for Miyu in the past 3 years. She wonders what life is like for Miyu now, living the life of a celebrity. Recently, posters and advertisements with Miyu in it had been all over Japan and it is difficult not to see her face, However, Chigi had tried not too as it is painful to realise the fact that they are living new lives now and this new life is causing Miyu to be more and more unreachable.

She also wondered how many pursuers are chasing after Miyu wanting to be her boyfriends. Chigi had always pictured that Miyu would eventually marry a man and have kids like a traditional family would therefore the thought of herself and Miyu being together had never occurred to her (or she refused to think that there will be such possibility). This was another reason why she had maintained a distance because she presumed Miyu was straight and always will be. Having said this, Chigi wished nothing more than Miyu to be happy. If Miyu is happy, then her heart can rest to.

Miyu had stopped talking and Chigi wished she had payed a little more attention. Instantly, she grabbed her remote control and pressed the record button to watch it again (and again) in the future. The live interview had ended with Miyu and the co-star saying goodbyes and a trailer of the drama. Chigi payed no attention to this of course because she was now debating as to whether to send a text message to Miyu saying she did a great job of the interview. Will she be surprised to hear from me? Will she even answer? Will she even care now? Oh for goodness sake, to hell with it!

Chigi grabbed her phone and scrolled down the messages to find her chat with Miyu. She saw that the last time herself and Miyu spoke was when Miyu sent her a happy birthday text which Chigi didn’t even reply to. Of course on the day she read the text, but did not know how to respond which ended up for Chigi to not respond at all in the end. She wondered if Miyu had been angry or not, maybe that’s why Miyu hasn't started a conversation since then.

Chigi started typing, ‘just saw your interview for your new series. Good job!’ She added a thumb-ups emoji at the end of it to emphasis the ‘good job’. Her finger hovered over the ‘send’ button and debated one last time about whether to send it or not. Her mind was set and she pressed down. Chigi then put her phone on stand-by and placed it on the coffee table waiting for a reply. Miyu was probably busy right now so she may not reply. Or maybe Miyu will read the text but not respond to it just to get revenge on Chigi. Whatever, Chigi said what she needed to say and she was genuine about it.

* * *

 

Miyu:

Back in her dressing room at the broadcasting station, Miyu was prepared to go home. MoMo is waiting for Miyu outside her dressing room door just so Miyu can get her belongings. Miyu already had her coat on and was looking for her handbag. She can see light in her handbag which was probably due to her work phone receiving text messages and emails. Wait a minute?! It can’t be her work phone because MoMo still have it from when she gave it to her in the elevator on the way here. Miyu immediately started to fumble through her bag trying to find the phone. Once she found it, she read the notification.

It was from her. IT WAS FROM CHIGI-SAN.

Alarm bells started ringing in her ears as she tried to calm down to read the message.

_Just saw your interview for your new series. Good job!_

Chigi-san watched her! Chigi-san actually watched her! No words can describe her state right now, she was absolutely over the moon! The last time she spoke to Chigi-san was on Chigi-san’s birthday but she never got a reply back. Miyu just thought she had being busy with other people and did get the chance to reply. Therefore to get a text from Chigi-san out of the blue like this, is definitely a surprise for Miyu. Miyu squealed and started to jump up and down. She haven’t felt this happy in a while now.

‘Oi, hurry up! I’m hungry so let’s get back to the hotel where we can eat something!’ Screamed an annoyed MoMo through the dressing room door. Miyu immediately calmed down but the smile on her face was still there. She’ll think about her reply to Chigi-san on the way back to hotel. She is nervous and her heart can’t stop beating.

Miyu opened the room door and was met with MoMo who immediately said, ‘What are you so happy about.’ She was indicating to the grin on Miyu’s face right now.

‘Nothing. Come on let’s go. I thought you were hungry.’ MoMo’s vision followed Miyu with a slightly open mouth and amazed expression as Miyu walked past her and down the hallway.

‘What’s up with her?’ MoMo shrugged her shoulders and followed Miyu. This may have been the first time MoMo’s seen a Miyu so full of purpose before.


	4. Chapter 4

Miyu:

As soon as Miyu and MoMo got back to their 5-star hotel, Miyu said goodnight to her personal assistant and headed straight to her room. ‘What in the world is going?’ Said MoMo as she watched Miyu run to the elevators with suspicious eyes. MoMo is determined to get down to the bottom of this.

In the elevator, Miyu is trying not to bounce up and down with excitement (like she did in the car ride back like a lunatic) because first of all, there are other people in here with her and second of all, she didn’t want the elevator to breakdown. When it had arrived on her floor, she rushed out of the doors and took out the key for her hotel room door. The people who were still in the elevator shared a look with each other, all wondering if that girl was sane.

*Beep* her room door opened, Miyu went inside and closed the door behind her with a push of her foot. Miyu dumped her belongings (except for the phone with the text from Chigi-san) on the chair and sat down on the corner of her bed, about to write a reply to Chigi-san for which she had been thinking about since they left the broadcasting station.

She took a deep breath and types, ‘ _Arigatou_ Chigi-san! I’m glad you took your time and watched our interview take place. Hope I didn’t appear too nervous and that I had enunciated my words clearly. Anyway, I hope you have been well?’ She hesitated to press the send button but decided that this was the best the reply was going to get. She pressed down and hoped for a reply.

* * *

 

Chigi:

Chigi heard her phone buzz and dove straight for her phone. She picked it up and immediately a smile crept on her face. It was Miyu, looks like that girl hasn’t forgotten about her yet.

_Arigatou Chigi-san! I’m glad you took your time and watched our interview take place. Hope I didn’t appear too nervous and that I had enunciated my words clearly. Anyway, I hope you have been well?_ \- Miyu

_Baka_ , of course anything to do with Yuumi-chan Chigi would be interested in. In fact, she’s been secretly keeping herself up-to-date with every project Miyu had been in. In a way, she had kept the promise she made with Miyu that Chigi would always lookout for her. Chigi thought of a reply and types.

_Actually I was just flipping through the channels and happened to come across the interview. And yeah, I’ve been pretty well doing my own stuff. How about you, Miyu-chan?_ – Chigi. That wasn’t a complete lie Chigi guess.

_I’m good as well, thank you Chigi-san for asking!_ – Miyu

Chigi smiled again and wondered when will ever this girl stop being so polite all the time.

However, now neither of them knew what else to say.

Actually that is not entirely true. Because Chigi had a lot to say and ask. She wanted to ask if Miyu had been eating well? If Miyu had been sleeping well? If people are taking advantage of her in the industry etc etc. But obviously this is not the time nor the right way to say all this now. Just as Chigi thought that was the end of their conversation, Miyu sent another message.

_I was wondering…if Chigi-san is free, maybe we could meet up soon?_ – Miyu

Chigi looked at the text for a long time and pondered what her reply should be. Chigi wanted to say ‘yes’ but also wanted to maintain a distance. Then suddenly Miyu sent back saying,

_Don’t worry, it’s fine. If Chigi-san is busy then you don’t have to go through with this trouble_ – Miyu

Chigi chuckled because she knew Miyu and her tendency to overthink when Chigi doesn’t reply immediately. Chigi misses Miyu and she wants to see her.

_I will be free 29 th of November. We can meet up for lunch or something. How about the Japanese curry place we used to go to with the Yukigumi kids. I’ve been craving their dishes recently_ – Chigi

_Hai! I’ve been craving their curries too! But if something comes up for you, feel free to cancel on me because I don’t want to cause any trouble…_ – Miyu

_Don’t worry about me, if I say it’s fine, then it’s fine. Ok, so I guess I’ll see you then_ – Chigi

_Yep! See you then_ _J Goodnight Chigi-san_ – Miyu

Chigi was going to send a goodnight reply back but decided against it. Because the phrase ‘maintaining the distance’ is still chanting in her mind (even though she and Miyu just booked a lunch date together). Gosh what was she thinking? Chigi let out a sigh and thought what is done is done. She could cancel anytime but the thought of a disappointed Miyu was unbearable. Chigi will just see this as an up-coming reunion with an old friend and she will not think more about it until the day comes. Chigi then went back to the kitchen and continued with her cooking (for which she was failing miserably).

* * *

 

Miyu:

Miyu was excited, probably the most excited she had been recently. She was finally going to see (her?) Chigi-san again! Jumping up and down while squealing probably wasn’t the most ideal thing to do at this time of the night because soon after, a member of staff knocked on Miyu’s door to tell her about the complaints from her neighbours. Miyu apologized profusely and said that she will now stop. However after she closed door, her big grin returned and dove straight into her bed and started to roll around merrily in it.

*Knock knock* huh? I am being too loud again? Miyu went to open the door just to find a questioning looking MoMo standing before her.

‘So do you have an explanation as to why that hotel staff was just at your door?’

‘Umm, I was jus–.’

‘Don’t bother lying, even a blind person can tell that you’re about to lie.’  Miyu stared at MoMo and decide she would proceed to tell the truth.

‘Next door and downstairs complained about the noises I was making…’

‘What noises?’

‘Umm, well you see… something good, really good, happened so I was kinda excited, maybe a bit too excited….’ Said Miyu with a blush on her face.

‘Something good, really good, happened? What happened?’ Asked MoMo in a slightly surprised yet demanding tone. Miyu had no option but to tell the truth because she knew MoMo would eventually find out one way or another anyway.

Miyu let out a defeated sigh and said, ‘Chigi-san contacted me,’ her personal assistant raised an eyebrow at this, ‘She said I did well in the interview today and I asked her if she was well. She said yes and asked how I was. I said I was well too and then… and the-‘

‘And then what?’

‘And then I asked her if she was free, if we could meet up…’ Miyu looked at the floor as she trailed off because she knew her current agency didn’t like her associating with anything to do with Takarazuka anymore. Her agency wanted her to have a fresh start and didn’t want her to be forever known as the Ex Top Musumeyaku of Takarazuka. Therefore, telling MoMo this now may ruin her plans with Chigi-san and Miyu knows her agency is fully capable of doing so.

After not hearing anything from MoMo, Miyu looked up to see what was going on. She expected to see a disapproving and angry look from MoMo but instead she saw tenderness in her eyes.

‘Miyu… you know the agency doesn’t like you hanging out with people from Takarazuka anymore,’ Miyu continued to listen, she knows where this is going, ‘But… I won’t say anything. In fact, you know what? I will help you.’

Eh? Did Miyu just hear that properly? MoMo was going to help her? Huh?!

‘Uh, excuse me I didn’t catch that. Could you repea-‘

‘I said I was going to help you,’ said her personal assistant. So she did hear right. Her personal assistant who is usually a mean-spirited, demanding, strict and something a right old b*tch wants to help her? Is this some sort of trap?

‘Why?’ Miyu asked.

‘Why you ask? Because I know true love when I see one,’ Miyu didn’t see anything because she was still processing what MoMo had just said.

‘This Chigi-san…? You love her don’t you?’

This struck Miyu by surprise because she had never really considered this question before. She felt deep, DEEP affection for Chigi-san and always wanting to be wherever she is, wanting to see her face every day, wanting to be embraced by her and sometimes wanting to touch her, to kiss her… But what is love? Is this what love is? When had she fallen in love with Chigi-san?

MoMo noticed the strained look on Miyu’s face and sighed and decided to interrupt her thoughts.

‘The way you’ve been acting ever since we left that broadcasting station was weird and so unlike your usual self. But this is the Miyu I want to see, not the over obedient one or the one who apologizes for everything. To survive in this industry you need to be more alive and spirited just like you were this afternoon. I was shocked when I saw you behaving this way. And now I know the reason. All because of Chigi-san right?’ Miyu nodded while looking at MoMo with wide eyes. She had also not seen this side of her personal assistant before.

‘Well I know the feeling, I also had someone in the past who made me feel the same way…’ said MoMo as if she was remembering a distant memory. ‘Therefore. I will help you. I want to see the side of Miyu when I first met her and the side of her this afternoon. I definitely do not want to see a Miyu who looks like she is tired of life anymore. And if Sagiri Seina, the Ex Top Star of Takarazuka, will help with that, then I’m in as well!’ Miyu couldn’t be more shocked.

‘You don’t have to look so shocked. If TV producers saw how lame and depressing you’ve been lately, no one will want to cast you. And if you lose your job, I lose my job too remember?’ Added MoMo trying to break this awkward tension.

Miyu now realises why her agency had assigned MoMo to her. Miyu needed to be shown the tough side of the TV industry and her personal assistant is the perfect person to do that. The sudden epiphany made Miyu wrap her arms around MoMo in a tight hug.

‘Thank you thank you thank you! I thought you were an evil, stuck up personal assistant of mine but now,’ Miyu said through her tears, ‘now my views of you have completely changed! You’re the best personal assistant anyone could ever wish for!’

‘Well if you don’t stop suffocating me, I’ll go back to being an evil, stuck up personal assistant. Also, if I help you this time, you owe me ok?’ Miyu realised how tightly she had been hugging MoMo so she let go immediately. She waited for MoMo to catch up with her breath and said, ‘Yes absolutely! I will do anything for you! And I’m sorry, I didn’t realise how tight that hug was. You see I was just too happy when I realised what a nice, kind, wonderful, beautifu-‘

‘Ok ok I get it, you don’t have to tell me all those things, I already know.’

Miyu giggled and MoMo couldn’t stop a giggle from escaping either.

‘Anyway, I’m going to bed now. Get some sleep, we still need to get up early tomorrow.’ MoMo said while rubbing her aching arms from Miyu’s hug. She’ll probably have a bruise tomorrow morning. Damn that girl’s got some upper body strength.

‘Yes, Sir!’ Said Miyu while doing a mocking salute. Both let out a laugh before MoMo turning around and leaving the room.

Staring at her hotel room door, Miyu didn’t realise what a big softy her personal assistant was. Looks like MoMo had a past of her own too.

That night both went to bed knowing their friendship had progressed one step and that they had bonded in a way like never before. It was good times for Miyu.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may have accidentally written myself into the fic in the form of MoMo


	5. Chapter 5

Chigi:  
  
So today is the day. At 6 o'clock this morning, Chigi was woken up by a text from Mattsu saying that she had landed in Haneda airport and the address to her home. She hadn’t seen Mattsu in nearly a year. The last time she saw her was backstage after a Caleb Hunt/Greatest Hits! showing. When Mattsu came and visited them, she had also bought her wife along with her. The staff and everyone in the revue that day kept that on the down-low because they wanted to protect the identity of Mattsu’s wife and their relationship from prying eyes of fans.  
  
After Chigi had finished breakfast, which simply consisted of a bowl of cereal, she took a morning train to Tokyo where she will be having lunch with Mattsu in Mattsu’s home. She didn’t bother carrying too much with her as she’s only out for the day (or so she thought). Therefore, grabbing her keys, purse and 2 bottles of champagne she bought for Mattsu and her wife, she headed out.  
  
By the time she got to Tokyo, it was already noon and Chigi is feeling her hunger more and more.  
  
If only Miyu was here with her home-cooking. Ah… she’d do anything to have that kind of luxury agai-   
  
Nope, nope! She will not think about her. Today she will focus on catching up with Mattsu and having a good time. After taking a few deep breathes of the cold air, Chigi called a taxi and headed for Mattsu’s address.   
  
The Taxi driver must have seemed to recognise her because he kept on gazing her through his front mirror. Chigi wished that this driver would just confirm his recognition because it was kind of awkward the situation they are in now. Suddenly she hears a familiar voice through on the car radio. 

Gosh, it seems like Chigi can never escape from that woman. It was Miyu singing the OST for her new drama series. Ironically, the lyrics seemed to be about forbidden and unrequited love. Chigi thinks the world must be playing a cruel joke on her.   
  
Before she knew it, the driver turned up the radio and said, ‘Ah, I’ve been obsessed with this song. Do you know her, Mister? Sakihi Miyu I mean?’   
  
If the driver had recognised Chigi, he was obviously too dumb enough to not make the connection between herself and Miyu. And apparently also too dumb to get her gender wrong.  
  
'She is this hot new actress you know? Very, very talented. Used to be a musumeyaku from that all-lady theatre company, a time wasted if you ask me, spending all those years with women only.’ Chigi didn’t like the way this conversation was going.  
  
'Having said that, she has a great singing voice though and may I add a great figure too.’ A smirk appeared on the man’s face. Chigi is disgusted to see the man talking about Miyu in this way. The guy is practically drooling for goodness sake!   
  
'Yep, I’m definitely a fan of hers alright!’ The driver then let out a series of sounds that was a cross between a laugh and a snort. Chigi would describe him as a spitting image of a pig right now. He is obviously an old, perverted man who sees Miyu in a sexual way and Chigi did not like that one bit.   
  
If it was legal to do so, she would have plunged a knife into the back of his neck by now. But thank god, the world had blessed her with self-control as she is now sitting back on her seat, taking deep breaths with her eyes closed, trying to enjoy Miyu’s voice instead.  
  
'Yep we’re here. That’ll be 950 yen please.’  
  
Chigi said nothing and handed over the money to him.  
  
'Mister, you don’t really speak very much do you?’ the driver joked. Chigi couldn’t believe the nerves on this guy.   
  
She opened the taxi door and said, 'no I don’t. And for you information, I’m a woman.’  
  
Just as Chigi was about to get out of the car, she caught the look on the driver’s face. It was the face of dread and sudden realisation.   
  
'Ta-ta-ka-ka-ra…,’ the man had managed to utter out.  
  
'Yes.’ Is the only word Chigi said, before walking away with a smug look on her face.   
  
Finally she could get some fresh air. But Chigi’s mind suddenly went back to Miyu.   
  
Is this the type of person Miyu has to deal with? What if someone like him approaches Miyu? What if someone like him ends up marrying her? All these questions started to invade Chigi thoughts but Chigi immediately shook her head trying to clear of them.   
  
Miyu is not her responsibility anymore, actually what is she talking about, Miyu has never being her responsibility. Chigi believes that Miyu should be mature enough to realise that there are people like him out there and that she should avoid them. Chigi is also sure that there are probably people protecting Miyu as well. Chigi sighs.  
  
Not matter what, it seems like Chigi can’t get Miyu out of her mind. But thankfully, Chigi still remembers what she is here for though. She found her way to Mattsu’s address, which didn’t take too long, and pressed the doorbell. Maybe being in Mattsu’s presence will make her forget about Miyu’s presence for a few hours.   
  
She couldn’t be more wrong.

Being early November, the days are chilly and windy and unfortunately for Chigi she hated it because she hated the cold. After ringing Mattsu’s doorbell a few moments ago, she had been shivering outside Mattsu’s Tokyo home waiting for Mattsu to come down and get her.   
  
By-passers had been giving her a look as if to say 'why is this person waiting outside in the cold like this?’ Chigi just hoped none of them were Takarazuka fans. She tucked her hands into her coat pocket and started to fiddle with the keyring inside which was attached to her keys.   
  
As she traced its snow-shaped outline with her fingers, she felt warmth rise within her as this keyring had always been a source of comfort. It reminded her of home. Then next to her, the door suddenly opened.  
  
'Chigi!! Nice to see you again!’ Mattsu gave Chigi a hug and as she spoke, steam was coming out of her mouth. 'Sorry for the long wait. I was just unpacking. Come on in, you must be freezing.’  
  
'Hell yeah I am,’ with this Chigi slipped into the door and into the warm, cosy home of Mattsu’s. Once the door was closed, Chigi turned around and said, 'Mattsu! Long-time no see, how have you been? How’s business in England?’ She was glad to see her friend again.  
  
'Yes indeed! I’ve been doing pretty well and my business is doing alright too. Haha enough to pay the bills. How about you though, how’s post-taka life treating you? Wait let’s go and sit down on the sofa.’  
  
As they sat down, Mattsu’s wife came out from the kitchen with a tray of tea. 'Chigi-san! How are you? Actually, no time to talk. I’m in a rush to go to a meeting so I’ll see you and Mattsu in a few hours. The lunch is ready in the kitchen so feel free you eat it when you two are ready.’ Said Mrs Mattsu.  
  
'Ehhhh? Are you not going to eat with us? I haven’t even properly said hello yet.’ Exclaimed Chigi.  
  
'No no it’s ok, eat without me. Anyway I have some business to attend to so I’ll need to get going now.’ With that she bent down to peck Mattsu on the lips and left the house.   
  
'Gosh you wife seems so busy. Within hours of landing in Japan and she has a meeting to attend to? Woah I’m impressed.’ Said Chigi while sipping the tea Mrs Mattsu brought out.   
  
'Haha yeah, well it can’t be helped. She has a company of her own and there things needing to be sorted out by her.’  
  
'I’m sure you guys earn more than enough to 'just pay the bills’ right?’ Said Chigi while giving Mattsu a knowing smile.  
  
'We’re doing ok I guess.’ Chigi can see that Mattsu is being modest but this is one of the traits Chigi liked about her.   
  
'Anyway are you hungry? Let’s move to the kitchen.’ The two got up and sat opposite each other on the kitchen table which was filled with delicious food already prepared for them.   
  
Looks like Mattsu got herself a wife who can cook!  
  
'So Chigi, how about you. What is your work situation like?’  
  
'Well,’ said Chigi with a mouth full of rice, 'I’m currently a teacher at the middle school I used to go to. It’s just a temporary one though. I need to buy myself some time to think over some stuff.’  
  
'Such as?’  
  
'You know, if I want to carry on in the entertainment industry or not… if I want to start a family of m-’   
  
'You mean love life?’ Mattsu interrupted.  
  
Chigi nearly chocked on her rice. Mattsu’s straight-forward personality hasn’t changed one bit, as well as her love to gossip. Having said this, this is the subject Chigi had wanted to talk about.   
  
Mattsu is the only person (other than Tomomin, who is on holiday in Hawaii right now) whom she feels comfortable enough to open up to. The main reason for this, is because she and Mattsu shared the same interest, which is the fairer sex, in other words, women.   
  
'Ye-yeah well, including that too.’ Mattsu nodded to Chigi’s words.  
  
'So how’s Miyu doing?’ Chigi nearly chocked again. Gosh this woman can read her like an open book.  
  
'Last time I heard, she’s doing pretty well. Actually, can we not talk about h-’  
  
'So I presume you guys are still 'friends’?’   
  
'Of course. We’ve always been friends.’ Looks like Mattsu isn’t going to let them get out of the subject of Miyu.   
  
There was a slight pause and Mattsu said, 'Miyu is doing pretty well for herself isn’t she? On the way home in the car, I saw at least 10 different advertisements with her face on.’  
  
'Yeah she is. I’m glad for her, really, I knew that kid would go far.’ Chigi said with a little proudness in her heart. Mattsu gave an understanding nod again.  
  
'Hmm ok. So anyway, when are you thinking of confessing to her?’  
  
Chigi chocked again. Seriously, eating while having a conversion with Mattsu is a dangerous game.  
  
'I’m not.’ Chigi simply said.  
  
'What do you mean 'I’m not’? You guys can literally blind a dog if it was alone in a room with you two. It’s physically painfully for me to see two people in love and not tell each other’  
  
Chigi sighs, 'How many times do I have to say it. Miyu doesn’t think of me in that way, at least not anymore. I’m a woman and she is straight, full stop. No one can change those facts.’ A pause followed and then Chigi carried on, 'and let’s not forget, remember the backlash you faced when you confessed you love for a woman.’ Chigi knew this was a sore subject for Mattsu but she continued on anyway.  
  
'I can handle it but Miyu, Miyu has a whole career in front of her and I refuse to be the one to ruin that.’ There was a pause again.  
  
'Chigi. I’m going to say something here and I don’t want you to interrupt until I finish ok?’ Chigi wanted to protest but gave up and nodded instead. Mattsu carried on, 'I can bet on my life that Yuumi-chan feels the same way about you as you feel about her.’  
    
Chigi scoffed. As if!  
  
'Eventhough, I’ve only seen you two together a few times before, but it is more than obvious to me how she feels about you. The way she looks at you, the way she speaks to you, the way she acts around yo-‘  
  
'Well isn’t that how every musumeyaku acts with their top-san. With heart eyes and an overwhelming sense to serve them?’ Chigi had to interrupt here.  
  
'Indeed but with Miyu it’s different! Miyu sees you as a woman. She sees you for who you truly are. And she likes for who you truly are.’  
    
'You can’t possibly know that, you hardly know her!’  
  
'But you do! You know her better than anyone. And the fact that you can’t see she is madly in love with you is beyond mine or anyone’s comprehension!’   
  
There was a moment of silence after this and Mattsu continued on softly, 'I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but I can see that you’re suffering. Miyu is probably somewhere suffering as well. Sometimes I think your stubbornness is too much for your own good.’  
    
Chigi let out a puff. At this moment in time, Mattsu looks like a mother trying to talk sense into her 5 year old child.   
  
'Are you going to see her anytime soon?’  
  
Chigi wondered if she should tell Mattsu or not but decided to anyway because it won’t make any difference to this current situation  
  
'Yes in a few weeks’ time. We’re meeting up for a meal.’  
  
'Well, you still have some time to decide what you want to do then,’ said Mattsu finally taking a bite of her own food.  
  
Mattsu was right, indeed Chigi has a lot of time. But she has already decided though. She is determined to keep everything just as they are and continue to avoid any more questions or topic conversations to do with Miyu.


	6. Chapter 6

Chigi:

At some point during their meal and talking about their past days in Takarazuka, Mattsu received a call from her iPad which was on the living room coffee table. She got up to the living room and saw the caller displayed on the screen.

‘Oh it’s Shou! I think she wants to FaceTime! Is that ok?’ Mattsu shouted from her living room.

‘Great bring it over and put her on! Let’s show her the delicious array of food we’re eating.’ Chigi shouted back. Mattsu re-entered the kitchen and sat down next to Chigi with the iPad in her hands. Mattsu pressed the answer button and immediately Shou’s face appeared on screen. In Takarazuka makeup?

‘Mattsu-san!! I heard you got back from the UK? Wait? Is that Chigi-san next to you? Hello Chigi-san!’ Said Shou. She must have been backstage because there were a lot of background noise and it was difficult to make out what she was saying. Suddenly, a hand pushed Shou’s face away.

‘Wait did I hear Chigi-san? Is she there?’ Came the unmistakeable voice of Saki who was also in make-up.

‘CHIGI-SAN! I see you! We miss you sooo much!’ Saki was now covering the screen with kisses and Chigi couldn’t help but laugh and cringe at the same time.

‘Yes, yes it’s me. You guys up to no good again?’

‘Actually,’ Shou was now back in view trying to push Saki out of the way, ‘we’re having a dress rehearsal. It’s nice to see you Chigi-san, how have you been?’

‘I’ve been doing great, just catching up with our pal Mattsu here.’ Chigi said putting her arms around Mattsu’s shoulder.

‘I’m doing great too if you wondering.’ Saki butted in again and Shou rolled her eyes. Both Chigi and Mattsu laughed. Looks like they haven’t changed at all.

‘Mattsu you catch up with these kids, I’ll go and get the champagne I got for you.’

‘Ok see you Chigi-san!’ ‘Yeah see you Chigi-san,’ said Saki and Shou almost in unison.

As Chigi left the kitchen she can hear Saki and Shou fighting over who gets talk to Mattsu first. Chigi shook her head and chuckled. Maybe she should invite them to her house soon? It’ll be nice to see all of them again.

By the time Chigi got back, it had looked like Mattsu had stopping talking to them. ‘Eh? Finished so soon? Did something happen?’

‘No it’s fine, they had to go because they were called back to rehearsals.’

Chigi sighed and said softly, ‘those kids work very hard, I can see it with own eyes yet they still have a long way ahead of them. But having watched them grow up, I know they’re strong and resilient enough to hold until the very end. They were my proudest treasures when I was the Top Star of our troupe.’

‘Don’t forget Chigi, we were all like that once too. All fighting our way to the top even though we all knew only a few will succeed. One of them was you remember.’ As Mattsu said this, Chigi had laid out two glasses and popped open one of the bottles of wine. She filled both of them up and offered one to Mattsu.

‘Anyway, enough talking about the past. Here’s to the future.’ Chigi raised her glass.

‘To the future.’ Mattsu raised her glass and both downed the alcohol in one go.

After that, they decided to migrate to the living room where they continued to chat and gossip away. What they didn’t realise was how the bottles of champagne were steadily getting emptier and emptier until Mrs Mattsu came home just to find them both collapsed and sleeping on the sofa with the whole room smelling of alcohol.

‘In my next life, I’m definitely not marrying a Takarazuka Otokoyaku again.’ Mumbled Mrs Mattsu as she draped blankets over the pair of them.

* * *

 Miyu:

It is late afternoon and Miyu had just finished shooting another scene. She is now back in her trailer getting changed and removing her makeup. Miyu sat down in front of the mirror and rubbed her eyes with her fingers trying her hardest not to fall sleep on her dressing table.

She was absolutely exhausted. They had started filming ever since 4 a.m. this morning. The director had said this was one of the most crucial turning points in the plot so it was important for them to get it perfect. Ever since Miyu had started in the TV business, she had realised how different performing is in front of the camera to how it is in front of an audience on stage.

She was scared to admit it but she much preferred the stage. She missed the exhilarating feeling she gets when she sings with the orchestra or the freedom she felt when she expressed her emotions through dance. However, she missed the rehearsals the most. Because it was then when true emotions were expressed and it was then when they were able to dance like no one’s watching.

It was also then, when interesting stories would arise or funny stories depending on who you ask.

* * *

 

Flashback:

(Miyu POV) Miyu looked up from where she was sitting and saw the time on the clock. It was nearly 9 p.m. but Chigi-san and herself were still practising for the duet prepared for the Rurounin Kenshin after show. Chigi-san said she wasn’t too happy with how they were currently cooperating so she had asked Miyu if she was willing to stay behind a couple of hours more to practice. However that was already 4 hours ago and yet they’re still here. Her whole body ached but seeing Chigi-San so engrossed and so full of concentration dancing in front of the mirror, Miyu had forgotten about her pains and had been following Chigi’s every move. Chigi-San was indeed wonderful, having her as Top-san had inspired many kakyusei including Miyu herself.

‘Yuumi-chan could you come here a sec? I just need to double check something’ Chigi-san motioned Miyu to come over and Miyu bounced to her feet and immediately scurried over to Chigi.

'Can we go from the place where the music is about to slow down and I’m spinning us around?’

Miyu knew exactly where that the place was so she positioned herself and waited for Chigi’s cue. Chigi went to start the music and moments after, they started dancing.

 Chigi’s hand was placed firmly on Miyu’s waist and Miyu’s hand was placed on Chigi’s shoulder while their other hands were clasped together above them as Chigi spun them around and around. Their faces were inches away from each and their eyes keeping intense eye contact. Miyu wondered if Chigi-san can hear her heart pounding because she can definitely feel it through her own chest.

She admittedly felt a little guilty for feeling this way because it seemed like to her she was taking advantage of the situation when in fact she should be concentrating on the routine.

Just as she was thinking that, it seemed like Miyu had missed a step which resulted in Chigi-San tripping over Miyu’s leg and sending them both toppling down onto the floor.

In a state of confusion, Miyu felt a soft form underneath her own body where instead she should be finding the cold, hard floor. A noise then slowly filled the room which got louder and louder.

'Hahahahahaha… Hahahahhahah…,’ the body underneath her had started to laugh hysterically. The body underneath her whose name Miyu just remembered is Sagiri Seina.

Oh gosh she had fallen on Chigi-San!

Immediately she tried to get up but her foot stepped on the slippery material of her skirt which resulted her to land forcefully on Chigi-san again but this time receiving an 'omphf’ from Chigi-san.

'Sakihi Miyu… One of these days you are really going to kill me…’ Groaned Chigi-San who was in slight pain but still had humour in the way she spoke. Seeing Chigi-san’s scrunched up face so close up was apparently comical for Miyu because this time it was Miyu’s turn to start laughing hysterically.

Realising that she may have being disrespectful, Miyu started to die down her laughter and then only to find a slightly wide eyed Chigi-san staring up at her.

Miyu’s two arms had been placed either side of Chigi-san’s head on the floor therefore giving Chigi-san very little space to move. Not only that, one of her legs was between both of Chigi-san’s. This realisation made a blush bloom from her neck and Chigi-san must have seen it because her eyes had followed the rising blush up to Miyu’s face and then finally stopping at her eyes. Miyu thinks she must have been hypnotised as she cannot physically move, Chigi-san’s stare had drawn her in like opposite poles of a magnet.

Their breathing at some point went in sync as they can feel each other’s chest rising and sinking with every inhale and exhale.

Miyu’s eyes moved down to Chigi’s mouth which had been slightly parted. Unconsciously, Miyu licked her own lips and this action had not gone unnoticed by Chigi-san because Chigi-san’s breathing has become more erratic.

Suddenly a loud 'Yelp!’ was heard from the doorway which pulled both Miyu and Chigi out of their trance.

’S-so-sor-sorry!’

It was Saki and Hitoko.

These two had just walked in on Miyu and Chigi in a very intimate position and looked like they were about to engage in an activity not suitable for child audiences.

'W-we were ju-just getting our s-stuff. W-we fo-forgot it here!’ Said the pair while giving a right-angle bow towards the other pair who were still on the floor.

(Chigi POV) Chigi looked back and forth between themselves and Saki and Hitoko by the door and realised what was going on. Immediately she pushed Miyu off her and stood up abruptly.

'No no no this isn’t what it looks like.’ Chigi tried to explain while waving her arms in front of her. 'We just had a little accident that’s all, I tripped ov-’

'I’m so sorry Chigi-san! We will knock next time! I-I don’t think we see our stuff h-here after all, haha! We don’t want to disturb you two any f-further so goodbye!’

'Wait! Let me exp-’ Before Chigi had the chance to finish Saki and Hitoko had already ran off.

With her back to Miyu, Chigi pinched the top of her nose between her eyes and let out a groan of frustration. Chigi then turned around to look at Miyu who was still sitting on the floor looking up at Chigi with eyes wondering what to do.

'I’m sor-’

'Don’t apologise Yuumi-chan. It wasn’t your fault. It was just a misunderstanding. I’ll explain what happened to them tomorrow,’ Chigi took another breath and said, 'Come one let’s pack up. I think we’re both tired today and needing an early night.’

Miyu didn’t say anything more and simply grabbed her stuff and followed Chigi out of the door after switching off the lights in the room. Chigi walked in front of her and Miyu walked behind with eyes trained to the floor.

As they parted at the entrance, Chigi said a quiet ‘goodbye’ and ‘see you tomorrow’ while avoiding eye contact with Miyu and went to find her car. Miyu was still waiting by the entrance for her assistant to collect her. Chigi wanted to wait with her but she also wanted to get away from the air of whatever it is that was currently between them.

Having found her car, she pressed the unlock button on her keys and slipped into the car. After she dumped her stuff on the passenger’s seat, she closed her eyes and rested her head back against the car seat. Chigi wondered if she’ll get any sleep tonight.

Chigi then spent the next few days chasing after Saki and Hitoko (who were actively avoiding her because they were scared) trying to explain what actually happened that night. However, after a while it seemed like Saki and Hitoko had taken it in because they had now started to use the incident against Chigi.

Every time they wanted to tease or blackmail her, they would bring up the story which would induce a blush on both Chigi and Miyu while Saki and Hitoko giggled like crazy. Chigi would then run after those two, telling them to forget about what they saw or else!

Life was definitely hard for the Top-san.

* * *

 

Miyu:  

Going through those memories every once in a while was bittersweet however it had reminded Miyu of who she was at the same time. It reminded her where she had come from and the experiences, sad and happy ones, which she had been through.

However, she was afraid that she will not be able to make memories like these again, because before it had being about working, laughing even crying as a team, but now it felt like everyone around her just cared about how themselves. Each cared about how they individually looked and how they individually are promoted. Sitting in her own trailer didn’t make her feel better as it had only made her feel more lonesome.

With tears starting to build again, she started to grab her things and stuffed them into her handbag wanting to get out and get some fresh air.

*Knock knock* Miyu wiped her eyes and cleared her throat as she went to open the trailer door, expecting to see MoMo.

‘Haruto-kun?’

It was her co-star and Japan’s heartthrob, Haruto Akio.

‘Is there anything I could help you with?’

‘Um…,’ said Haruto scratching the back of his neck while looking away to the side.

Wait, was he blushing?

‘Can I talk to you inside?’

‘Um, of course, yes, coming in. Make yourself comfortable.’ Miyu was intrigued as to whatever he wanted to tell her. She turned her body so Haruto-kun can squeeze past and enter her trailer.

‘There’s something I want to ask.’ Haruto said now facing her and looking at her intently. In fact, he had also started to fidget with his fingers in front of him.

‘Sure go ahead.’ Miyu said in a slightly worried tone.

‘Uhh, I was wondering if you would… uh, if you would…’

‘Haruto-kun, are you alright? You face seems to be getting a bit pale? Would you like a glass of water?’ Miyu said now slightly more concerned. She didn’t want Japan’s heartthrob to faint in her trailer, his fans would kill her!

‘Y-yes I’m feeling perfectly fine. Th-thank you for asking.’ Haruto managed to get out.

‘An-anyway, what I was about to say was that, was that…’

All of the sudden, the hairs on the back of Miyu’s arms stood-up.

Something bad was going to happen because whenever Miyu’s hairs stood up, something bad always follows.

Was there going to be an earthquake?

Is there a thunderstorm coming?

Is ther-

‘PLEASE GO ON A DATE WITH ME!’

……

Huh?


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Chigi:

After waking up that morning, a throbbing headache immediately hit Chigi's head. Still a bit disorientated, Chigi slowly pushed herself up trying to figure out where she is. With a hand rested on her painfully head, she looked around to see where she was. When her vision slowly went into focus, she saw Mattsu walking towards her while carrying something. Looked like she had fallen asleep in Mattsu's house.

'Here. Drink this, it will ease the headache. My wife gave me one a few hours ago too and I feel a lot better now.’

Chigi smelt the liquid presented to her which seemed to be some sort of medicinal brew. She took it from Mattsu hands and held it within her own and took a sip. Immediately, her face scrunched up as it was absolutely vile and probably the bitterest thing she had ever tasted.

'Hahaha I know, I had the same reaction. But my wife made me drink it all so you have to as well.’

In no position to argue, Chigi obeyed and down the weird concoction in one go.

'Can I brush my teeth? Do you have a toothbrush and toothpaste I can borrow?' Chigi said whose face is still scrunched up because of the taste.

'Yeah, go to the upstairs bathroom, we already laid it out to you.’

'Thank you.' Chigi gave Mattsu a friendly smile and got up but found herself to be slightly wobbly on her feet. Mattsu's hands immediately went to help stabilise her friend and said, 'Want me to help you upstairs?’

Chigi felt a blush rising to her face and said, 'No no it's fine, I can manage.' Mattsu let go of her with uncertainty and Chigi made her way slowly, but surely, up the stairs while holding onto its railings.

Once she got to the bathroom she closed the door behind her and put her arms on the sides of the sink while taking a deep breath. She looked up and saw her reflection in the mirror. She was a complete mess. Chigi vowed then that she would never drink that much ever again.

She turned the tap onto its cold side and splashed her face a few times with it. Feeling more refreshed, she lifted her head and saw the toothbrush and face towel Mattsu had laid out for her on the window sill. Right now she couldn't be more grateful to have a friend like Mattsu.

Once she had washed up, she headed downstairs again and heard Mattsu shout, 'We're in the kitchen Chigi-chan! Come in for breakfast whenever you're ready!’

'Alright I'll be there in a sec!' Gosh, she wished she was Mattsu's and her wife's adopted child. Life would be so easy with them around.

Still a bit groggy from just having woken up, Chigi lost her balance a bit and bumped her leg on the living room coffee table and proceeded to knock off the remote control onto the floor.

The TV switched on and Chigi shouted in the direction of the kitchen, 'gomen! The remote control fell on the floor!' Chigi bent down to pick up the remote but when she looked up to turn off the TV, she felt all blood drain from her body.

It was the morning news broadcast, and it was currently reporting the events that had happened last night.

On the TV screen, were blurred but clear enough pictures of twopeople outside a grand looking hotel together with a caption saying 'Heart-break for fans across Japan! while the reporter explained the pictures in the background.

Chigi, of course, would recognise one of them from any whereas it was none other than Sakihi Miyu.

* * *

 

Miyu: (What happened the day before)

'So did you say yes?' MoMo has stopped pacing and is now staring down intently at Miyu eagerly waiting for a reply.

It had been half an hour since Haruto-kun left her trailer and MoMo is now here interrogating Miyu about what had happened. As of the moment, Miyu was still hazy as to what had happened as her mind was all of the place.

Miyu looked up at MoMo and said, 'I-I don't know.' After hearing that, MoMo gave an exasperated sigh and wondered what she was going to do with this clueless child.

'Before I even processed what he had asked of me, he was already out of the door! I-I can't recall what I said to him afterwards.' Miyu was in a slight state of panic and MoMo thought she would calm the girl down before she has a mental breakdown.

'Hey hey look at me.' MoMo put her hands onto Miyu's shoulders. 'Don't worry it'll be fine. But let me just ask one thing ok? And I want you to think carefully.' Miyu nodded and waited patiently for MoMo to pose her question.

'Do you have feelings for him? Do you like him?' MoMo said while looking at Miyu's face closely as if to search for something.  

Did Miyu like Haruto-kun? Of course, as a friend.

But romantically? Well that is another question to be answered.

Did he make her heart pound? No, was the answer which popped up immediately in Miyu's mind. But she has to admit, during those intimate scenes while shooting, her heart may have sped up a bit.

And did she find him attractive? Well of course, who didn't? He is full of charisma, talent and let's not forget, devilishly handsome as well. She was sure that even the men around him found him attractive.

But did she want to be with him? Did she care about him in an unique way? All the answers to these questions seemed to project a big 'NO' in Miyu's head but her mind is still too muddled for her to put all these information together.

As if MoMo could see the clockwork of processing in Miyu's head right now, she thought she would help Miyu out by giving her the ultimate question.

'Ok let me ask something else, this may help you.' Miyu waited and MoMo then said slowly and clearly, 'how does the feeling of spending time with Haruto, compare with the feeling you get when you spend time with you know who?' MoMo must have thought she was a genius having thought up with this question.

Miyu was about to ask who 'you know who' was but not a second later she realised.

Sagiri Seina. The woman who haunts her dreams, the woman whose name she mumbles in her sleep and the woman who occupies her mind 85% of time. Almost immediately, her head seemed immensely clearer and so, she began to answer MoMo's question in her head.

Compared to the feeling she gets from being around Haruto-kun, Chigi-san was warmth. Chigi-san was home from where Miyu would never want to leave from. Chigi-san was happiness, a feeling Miyu can never be tired of. Chigi-san was her sun, the only brightness when everything else was dark. Yes, this is how she felt about Chigi-san, in fact this is how she had always felt about Chigi-san. All throughout their reign as Top Combi in Takarazuka and all the way up till now.

And just like that, Miyu realised how much in love she really was. Her mind had never being more at peace with itself before and she felt like she could die right now, content with the fact the realisation has finally settled within her.

She couldn't wait to see her again. She was ready to lay out all her feelings, to confess.

'Nothing. Compared to her, he's nothing.' Came a simple, confident reply from Miyu.

MoMo nearly chocked out a laugh because she had never imagined anyone would describe Haruto Akio as 'nothing' before. This girl must be head-over-heels in love with Sagiri-san and MoMo cannot wait to meet this woman in the future. She prays that kami-sama would give these two a happy ending.

'Knew you would say that,' said MoMo as she gave Miyu a wink and a knowing smile.

All of the sudden they heard a noise. It sounded like a text message alert and it was coming from Miyu's bag. Miyu and MoMo gave each other a wide-eyed look because Miyu's work phone was with MoMo therefore it must have been Miyu's private phone. Wondering who it might be, Miyu immediately jumped to action and took out her phone. She hoped it was from Her.

Eh? An unknown number? Miyu unlocked her phone and read the message.

_Hi Miyu-chan,_

_This is Haruto-Kun, I realised I may have shocked you a little today with the question in your trailer but I had being wanting to ask you out on a date for a while now but never really had the courage to. But hearing your 'yes' made my day and I'll probably be happy for several days to come. Anyway, if it's ok with you, I will collect you outside your house at 6 o'clock tonight. I made a reservation for us at the restaurant in XX hotel in Tokyo and I have told them to start the preparations now so there's nothing you need to worry about. I hope we'll enjoy our evening together._

_See you tonight,_

_Haruto Akio_

-Unknown Number

So, Miyu did say yes after all. Oh gosh, what was she going to do now?

But wait, how did he know her private number? Even more so, how did he know where she lived?

'That's strange… how did Haruto-kun know my phone number and my adder…' Said Miyu with a questioning look on her face. She looked up at MoMo for answers which Miyu didn't think MoMo had the answers to but MoMo was being suspiciously quiet and was looking nervously at the floor.

'Um…yeah about that… I may have told him all those things…oops haha,' laughed MoMo nervously. Complete utter shock took over Miyu's face and just as she was about to ask MoMo 'why?' MoMo interjected.

'But I didn't know his intentions I swear! I thought he was asking, you know, as a friend, I didn't think he had other plans. I swear to you Miyu, I had no idea about any of this.' Explained MoMo in a frantic fashion which was so different from her usual style.

If there is one thing Miyu knew about her personal assistant is that MoMo would never lie to her. MoMo is probably the most truthful and blunt person there is and she's never afraid to tell you the way it is. Therefore, she believed MoMo. However, it was still true that Miyu was a bit cross with her. Miyu let out a groan of frustration.

'What am I to do now?' Whined Miyu with her shoulders slack and head back looking up at the trailer ceiling.

'Well why don't you just cancel? What's he going do about it? Force you?' Scoffed MoMo, she wasn't going to let Haruto lay a finger on her if Miyu didn't want him to.

'But the reservation… can we just cancel it like that? The hotel staff members had already started preparing…' Miyu started to panic again and MoMo rolled her eyes at Miyu's favourite hobby to do which is to overthink.

'Ok fine, go then. Just don't think of it as being a date. Think of it as eating food together with a friend.' This was the best solution MoMo could think up right now to deal with the current Miyu.

'True but wouldn't Haruto-kun still think of it as a dat-’

'Less worrying about what he thinks ok? If he makes a move one you, just straight up reject him. Miyu you have to learn to be more assertive.’ Miyu can feel MoMo was reprimanding her now.

'But what if there are paparazzi?'

There. That ought to be the perfect reason to cancel this 'date' surely?

'Today's Wednesday isn't it?' MoMo asked and Miyu gave her a nod back who was wondering what MoMo was about to say.

'Then there shouldn't be too much to worry about. Paparazzi's are mostly active near to and during the weekends so there shouldn't be many of them out and about during a random Wednesday night I should think.’

Miyu wanted to argue but instead decided to continue tolisten to MoMo's reasoning. Because she really didn't want to bother the hotel staff or waste a reservation. What if someone else had also fought that reservation?

'Also I've been to XX hotel before. Not only do they have security inside and directly outside the building but they also have staff patrolling the areas around the building for paparazzi, as they are aware that their hotel is a popular gathering place for celebrities.' It sounded like MoMo was trying to convince herself as well but her reasoning seemed to be valid.

'So you really think I should go?’

MoMo paused for a moment and said, 'I think you should. Come on he's buying so it means you get free food tonight. FREE food Miyu! Who can resist free food right? I know I can't.' And with that MoMo wiggled a playful eyebrow at Miyu. Miyu didn't think her personal assistant was such a foodie. She had being learning a lot about MoMo these days now that their relationship have improved. But maybe MoMo was right, perhaps she had been thinking too much.

'You sure?’

'Sure. Everything should be fine. Go for it, go for the expensive, delicious free meal.' Miyu didn't really care about the last part of the sentence but the word 'should' didn't sit well with Miyu.

However, she did not want to think anymore. She can't be bothered. In fact, she was more nervous for the meal coming up with Chigi-san in a few weeks' time than the one coming up tonight.

'Ok, then.’

Miyu took a deep breath and closed her eyes. It's just dinner right? After all, it's not her first time eating dinner alone with someone else. In this business, an invitation by a co-star or a TV producer to have a meal together happens all the time! So in Miyu's mind, this will just be another one of those friendly invitations by another co-star to have dinner together.

What's so bad about that eh? And throughout the rest of that day, this is what she told herself.

However, the world can be a cruel place to live in sometimes. Because at the most unexpected and unwelcomed times, it decides to play a joke on you.

Because that night when Miyu and Haruto had finished their what-had-been-a-pleasant-and-discrete 'date', a figure was watching them existing the hotel together from the opposite side of the street.

In fact, the figure had been hiding in the shadows ever since the pair had arrived. The figure was perfectly disguised as a tramp and was now watching them as the pair entered the car Haruto used to pick up Miyu in. The figure then took out a small device from his coat pocket and took a few photos that he knew would earn him more than any picture ever had.

MoMo had been wrong about one thing and a surprise was waiting for them in the morning.

 


	8. Chapter 8

Chigi:  
  
'Last night pictures emerged showing Japan's biggest star Haruto Akio and television newcomer Sakihi Miyu exiting a prestigious hotel together. The pair looked very comfortable and intimate with Haruto Akio's hand placed around Miyu hips seemingly to be whispering something into her ears. Could this be a start of a new roman…?’

Chigi felt her heart drop to the bottom of her stomach and at the same time, the remote control had slipped out of her hands and once again landed on the floor. 

So, it finally happened eh? Miyu had found herself someone. 

How long had they been together? Who confessed? Was it Miyu or was it the other guy? Was she seeing him when they texted each other and arranged that lunch date? 

Chigi tried to stop these questions from emerging within her yet they continued to come and it may just have been too much for her.

'Chigi are you ok? What's taking so long?' Said Mattsu as she emerged from the kitchen with an apron on. Her concerned eyes followed the direction of Chigi's sight and saw why Chigi had not being talking. 

Stunned, Mattsu had also being silenced and was now looking intently at the TV.

…insiders told us that from the beginning Haruto Akio had an eye on Sakihi Miyu. However others are saying that Sakihi-san had been seducing after Haruto-kun in order to gain media attention…'

Thinking Chigi had probably heard enough, Mattsu immediately picked up the remote control and switched off the TV. Her eyes carefully wondered over to the direction of Chigi and saw that Chigi was still staring at the screen with an unreadable expression.

'Look, Chigi…. we don't know what's going on yet, let's not jump to any conclu-' Mattsu started to say.

'Mattsu I think it's pretty clear don't you think? After all a picture is worth a thousand words and there were a total three.' Chigi interrupted. Her eyes were void with emotions and that scared Mattsu a little.

'Still, let's wait for what Miyu has to say about th-’

'How about let's not.' Eye which were void of emotions a second ago were now filled with tears threatening to fall but no way in hell was Chigi going to let them.

'Told you didn't I? Miyu doesn't need me. And as you just saw, she had clearly demonstrated that.’ 

Silence followed but Chigi then continued, 'this is what she wants. No, this is what she needs. She needs someone who can give her a 'normal' family and she knows that. And you know what? I'm actually glad for her.' Sarcasm and spite filled Chigi's voice. 

'I don't agree, I think you shoul-' Mattsu tried to say.

'Please. Let's not talk about this anymore.' Said Chigi with eyes squeezed shut and with both fists clenched by her sides but all Mattsu heard was a desperate, helpless plea. 

Then another deafening silence filled the room. Mrs Mattsu, who had been watching the whole scene play out by the living room entrance, was heart-broken for Chigi and of course so was Mattsu. But none was more heart-broken than Chigi herself.

The silence was disrupted when Chigi suddenly cleared her throat and said in a quiet tone, 'um, I think I should probably get going now.' Mrs Mattsu immediately tried to protest but Chigi stopped her.

'Thank you… for your hospitality, I really enjoyed catching up with you guys.' Said Chigi now looking into the eyes of Mattsu and Mrs Mattsu, 'and please, feel free to contact me again whenever you're in Japan.’

Chigi turned and started to make her way towards the doorway but Mrs Mattsu chased after Chigi trying to stop her from leaving. 

However, Mattsu's arm went to grab and stop her wife who turned to her with a confused look. Mattsu then gave her wife a sad look as if to say, 'it's fine, let her be.' Mrs Mattsu gave an uncertain look back but then nodded instead. Mattsu probably knew Chigi more than she did, after all they were part of a bigger family, the Yukigumi family. 

After Chigi had put on her shoes in a rushed fashion, she opened the front door and turned around to face Mattsu and her wife. They can see her eyes were glistening with unshed tears yet somehow Chigi still managed to plaster a smile onto her face.

'Thank you for lunch yesterday and thank you for looking after Mattsu and I last night,' she said to Mrs Mattsu as she bent forward to give a respectable bow.

Then she turned her attention to Mattsu and said, 'Mattsu you got yourself a good wife here, don't lose her.' Seeing Chigi so earnest and serious, Mattsu gave Chigi a sad and sympathetic nod. 

'Good! Then I'll guess I'll get going then.' Chigi stepped out of the house and as she was just about to close the door, Mattsu said, 'text me when you get back home. And if you ever, ever, need anything, just remember we're always here for you. Me, my wife and whole of Yukigumi.' Sincerity was written all over Mattsu's face.

'Thank you, Mattsu. I'll keep that on mind,' said Chigi with another unreadable expression on her face. Mattsu can't even begin to imagine the thoughts and feelings running through Chigi's mind now.

'Anyway I really have to go now or I might miss the morning train back and then have to wait another 2 hours for the next one. Don't want that to happen do we?' Chigi tried her best to brighten the atmosphere but Mattsu and her wife both knew that Chigi was doing that to distract herself from the mess that was in her head.

As Chigi started to make her way down the Mattsu's street after giving them one last wave, Mattsu and her wife stood by their door watching Chigi's figure get smaller and smaller until she had turned the corner and disappeared. 

They just hoped Chigi would not do anything stupid and that kami-sama would give the child some love soon.

* * *

 Miyu:

Miyu and MoMo had been sitting in silence in Miyu's living room for around 2 hours now. MoMo had rushed to Miyu's house after having received a call from the agency telling her to turn on the television and watch the news immediately. 

MoMo's initial reaction had been similar to Mattsu's in a way that she was too shocked to say anything at first. 

The one thing she hoped wouldn't happen happened. And now she felt like this was all her fault. Maybe if she hadn't convinced Miyu to go maybe none of this would have happened. MoMo just wanted to smash her head into a brick wall.

The agency also told her that countless reporters have contacted them to request interviews with Sakihi Miyu but MoMo straight up told her boss to tell those bastard reporters that the relationship between Miyu and Haruto was purely platonic and nothing more.

The agency's reply to her was that the reporters were not going to stop pestering them until they hear it from Miyu's own mouth. However MoMo knew that the tabloids just wanted to use this opportunity to ask Miyu manipulating questions and to twist her own words so that they can dish up gossip to the public. Yeah, as if she was going to let Miyu go through that.

Back in this quiet yet tense atmosphere of Miyu's living room, all they can hear now is the ticking sound of the clock. 

*Tick-tock Tick-tock* 

And if MoMo was being honest, the noise was driving her crazy.

The agency had told them to sit for now until further instructions are given because if they were to say anything now, it would just be adding more fuel to the fire. MoMo and Miyu had also being ordered specifically not go out into the city because they will definitely be bombarded with reporters and paparazzi wanting to ask questions. 

Haruto's agency had also been contacted and was also waiting for the mood to calm down before doing anything. The two agencies had agreed to work together this time to sort out this situation as best as they can (and maybe somehow use this as their advantage to promote their respective celebrities). In fact, the agencies didn't really care about Miyu's and Haruto's relationship, they only cared if their reputations will be tarnished/significantly improved by this affair. 

Everyone was now sitting on the edge of their seats waiting for the storm to pass and to conduct their next plans. However, Miyu's worries were somewhere else completely. To be specific, her worries lay in a house somewhere in a town called Sasebo in the Nagasaki Prefecture. 

She had been staring at her phone which lay in the palm of her hands rested on her lap. Miyu wondered if She knew what had happened. Miyu wanted to text Chigi-san to tell her that what they said on the news was not true, that she wasn't going out with Haruto Akio and that her heart only belonged to her. 

But something was stopping her from doing it. Because why would Chigi-san care? Chigi-san probably had better things to do, Chigi-san most probably didn't even think about her that way. After all, they're not a Combi anymore.

Miyu didn't know what to do and just wished the world would close in on her and make her disappear. But of course by doing that, she would never see Chigi-san again.

* * *

 Chigi:

By the time Chigi arrived at her doorstep, her knees felt like they were about to give and she was more than ready to lock herself up and away from the outside world. 

After stepping in and closing the door behind her, her leant back and pressed her back against the door. She slid down to the floor with a thud and curled up into a ball with her head between her knees. She was finding it difficult to breathe and felt her heart had been viscously torn apart.

But she wasn't about to cry though, she can't lose this battle. Chigi was determined to be strong and to not give in to these weak feelings. 

Having said that, her body refused to let her stand as it felt like every fibre within her had been mentally and physically exhausted and she was quickly falling into the emptiness of depression. And just like that, Chigi continued to sit like this for another hour or so with her eyes closed, trying her hardest to think about the good things that are left in the world for her. 

Eventually, a cloud of sleep overcame her and she fell into a deep, deep slumber. 

* * *

 A few hours later, Chigi had woken up and the sun was setting as she noticed the bright orange sunlight pierce through her windows. Her eyelids were still heavy and her vision was still blurred. Chigi's body ached from the position she had been in and was starting to feel a bit cold. But remembering why she had being in this position in the first place, she wished she hadn't remembered and that the events from today would be erased from her mind. 

Miyu had found herself a man and she was here all by herself. 

Eventhough there was a possibility that the media was telling lies, Chigi's mind went straight for the negative and believed every ounce of it because in her mind pessimism equalled to realism. 

As she felt the muscles in her thighs began to twitch, she realised she should probably get up before causing any unnecessary damage to her body because she still had a life of her own to lead. She wasn't going to let someone else's relationship ruining hers even though one of them happened the person she loved. She then squeezed her eyes together as an attempt to hold back the hot tears forming in her eyes again.

Now wanting to know what the period of the day it was, she searched her phone in her coat pocket and checked at the time.

For a second there, she was in a state of shock because there around 40 unread messages and phone calls. With wide eyes, she scrolled through them and found that most of them were from Mattsu. 

Oh sh*t!   
  
_Chigi have you got to the train station?_  - Mattsu  
  
_Has the train arrived?_ \- Mattsu  
  
_Chigi are you home yet?_  – Mattsu   
  
_Chigi where are you?!_ -Mattsu  
  
_Are you still on the train?_  - Mattsu  
  
_Call me back when you're home_  - Mattsu  
  
_Answer my calls Sagiri Seina!_  - Mattsu  
  
_Don't do anything stupid!_  - Mattsu  
  
_I swear if you do something stupid I'll going to kill you the next time I see you!_  – Mattsu  
  
In complete horror, she texted Mattsu back without another hesitation, her thumb had never worked so fast before.  
  
_Oh gosh Mattsu. I'm so, so sorry! I completely forgot and for some reason I just fell asleep the moment I got back. Gomen! Please, please forgive me!_  – Chigi  
  
She closed her eyes with a groan and banged the back her head repeatedly against the door for being so stupid. Chigi just prayed that Mattsu hadn't called the police or something.   
  
Chigi waited a while for a reply but it did not come immediately, therefore she went and checked the other unread messages. To her surprise they were from Saki and Hitoko.   
  
_Chigi-san you must have seen the news…I'm sorry…_  - Saki  
  
_But it's ok though you still have us!_  – Saki  
  
_Chigi-san if you have seen the news today, please don't pay attention to it! I highly doubt it is true and it's probably just the paparazzi playing up again! Don't listen to them Chigi-san!_ – Hitoko

Of course Chigi knew what they were talking about, but she did not have the mental energy to reply to them right now or to think about Her at all. Right now she just needed to make herself a nice cup of tea and to curl up again (this time on the sofa) and rid of herself anyone human interactions.

With a heave, she pushed herself off the floor and walked towards her kitchen with slack limbs with the intention of making tea. 

All of the sudden, her doorbell sounded. 

*Ding Dong* It was loud in her ears and she wondered when she had such an annoying doorbell tone.

Anyone who could that be? Who dared to bother Chigi now? 

She contemplated as to whether she should get it due to the state the state she is in. 

The curtains had been closed so whoever the person might be, would not be able to see if Chigi was home or not. Maybe if Chigi left it long enough they would go away. 

As Chigi stood there for the next 10 seconds thinking and waiting in complete silence, the doorbell sounded again.

*Ding Dong* 

Again, Chigi did nothing and waited for the person to lose patience and leave. However, the person did not leave and continued to ring the doorbell 3 more times. 

Losing her own patience and perhaps will to live, Chigi stormed towards the door and opened the door with an angry swing of her arms.  
'What?!' Shouted Chigi roughly without acknowledging the individual's face first.

'Hello Chigi-san.’ 

Hearing that voice, Chigi immediately recognised who it was.

'Se-Seshiru?!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seshiru = Daigo Seshiru 大湖 せしる


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really sorry for the late update! But here it is finally! 
> 
> Also this chapter has 18+ content with some Chigi X Seshiru so proceed at your own risk...

Chigi:

‘Se-Seshiru?!’ 

What the hell was Daigo Seshiru doing at her front door? Chigi didn’t know how she felt about this because even though Seshiru was a friend, a VERY close friend in fact, she did not want to see anyone right now.

'Well? Are you just going to stand there with your mouth open looking at me like that, or are you going to let me in?’ Said Seshiru in a teasing tone.

Chigi heard Seshiru but she wasn’t about to do what Seshiru had just asked because she needed to be alone right now and with Seshiru here, Chigi is not going to get the peace she wanted.

'Right now isn’t a good time,’ said Chigi in a firm tone, 'in fact, why you are here anyway?’ Chigi was starting to get a bit suspicious. Seshiru had always seemed to appear in front of Chigi when Chigi was at her most vulnerable, it was like as if Seshiru kept tags on everything she did. Having said this, Seshiru had always provided Chigi with the comfort she needed at the time. Well, 'the comfort’ was the same each time, as it always inevitably involved them being tangled in a bed together amongst sweaty limbs and damp bedsheets.

Yes, this had being the arrangement of their relationship ever since Chigi could remember and it had remained as one of Chigi’s biggest secrets (one other being the fact she was hopelessly in love with Miyu). However Chigi wasn’t ashamed of it, she just didn’t think it was anyone’s business to know. 

Therefore, one may conclude that Chigi and Seshiru were 'friends-with-benefits’, except for the fact that one of them was actually in love with the other.

* * *

Flashback:

The moment they got back to Chigi’s hotel room, Chigi pressed Seshiru forcefully back against the door. Their hips pushed desperately against each other trying to feel some friction. Chigi pinned Seshiru’s arms above her head and pressed their fronts tightly together. Her mouth went straight for Seshiru’s neck where she began to suck and lick the tender skin. There will definitely be marks on Seshiru’s neck tomorrow morning.

Seshiru let out a moan of pleasure and in a playful tone she said, 'got a bit jealous back there didn’t you?’ 

Chigi heard but did not respond as her mouth continued to work its way hungrily down Seshiru’s neck and then up again to trace the outline of her jaw. Chigi knew what Seshiru was indicating to but she did want to hear it right now, or ever.

'The way Reiko and Miyu were interacting with each other in the restaurant bothered you didn’t it?’ Said Seshiru breathlessly as Chigi continued to ravage her. All of the sudden, Chigi bit down on Seshiru’s skin which earned a small 'yelp’ from the said person.

'I don’t care and I don’t want to hear it,’ growled Chigi through her throat and Seshiru could not be more turned on. Seshiru loved this side of Chigi and she wanted to see more of it. Therefore she continued on with her tease while she felt Chigi’s hands all over her.

'Is that why you drank so much? To drown your jealousy?’ Chuckled Seshiru lightly as Chigi kneaded her breasts roughly through the material of her dress. 

Without a warning, Chigi ripped open Seshiru’s dress at the front and exposed Seshiru’s body. A wave of cold air hit Seshiru’s flesh and goose-bumps appeared on her skin. But Seshiru could not have been more aroused as she proceeded to let out a moan and craved for more.

She craved for Chigi to be inside her and for Chigi to mark her hers.

'I said, I don’t want to hear it.’

Seshiru can hear that Chigi was losing her patience and she knew that she was toying with a dangerous beast ready to rip her apart. But she loved it. 

Chigi then pushed up Seshiru’s bra and took one of Seshiru nipples into her mouth. At this contact, Seshiru let out a breathy sigh and braced herself on the door behind, trying her very best not to fall. Chigi’s tongue sucked and circled around Seshiru’s nipple until it was hardened and fully erect. There was nothing gentle about what Chigi was doing because she needed to forget what she saw back at the restaurant. 

Because Seshiru had been right. She was jealous. 

Chigi’s hand moved further down and stroked Seshiru’s centre through the thin material of her underwear which was already soaked with Seshiru’s juices.

Seshiru’s head was thrown back in ecstasy as she laced her fingers into Chigi’s hair trying to push her a bit further down. She then continued to toy with Chigi.

'You know, I wonder what their relationship is like. Do you think they’re lovers? Do you think Reiko does the same thing to Miyu as you are now with me?’ Seshiru felt Chigi’s fingernails dig into her skin as she took in the words Seshiru had just said.

'Be. Quite.’ Retorted Chigi through searing teeth as Seshiru felt Chigi’s breath against the soft flesh of her abdomen. Seshiru can’t help but smile.

'Well I’m afraid you’re going to have to make me,’ dared Seshiru with eyes closed and a sly smile on her lips.

'I guess I’m going to have to then.’ Countered Chigi now with a playful tone of her own as she stood up and pressed a searing kiss onto Seshiru’s lips. 

Seshiru returned the kiss with just as much force and bite down on Chigi’s lower lip. She can definitely taste the alcohol that was still in Chigi’s system. Not a second later, their tongues found each other and were intertwined in each other’s mouths. 

Their hot breaths were mingled together and Seshiru’s hands had come up to hold Chigi by the sides of her head, pulling her impossibly closer. They were both becoming breathless and their chests heaved in synchronisation. 

Without breaking the kiss, Chigi started to trace her fingers along the lining of Seshiru’s underwear and Seshiru braced herself for what is about to come. A moment later, Seshiru felt herself being stretched open by Chigi’s fingers and she felt like she was coming undone. 

Chigi entered Seshiru’s folds with two fingers with ease as Seshiru was already trenched and a silent scream escaped from Seshiru’s mouth. Chigi watched Seshiru’s reaction with fascination and a mischievous smile appeared on her face. Chigi knew she was good at what she did. 

She could feel Seshiru’s hips trying to push down against her hand but Chigi wasn’t going to let her. She then curled her fingers inside Seshiru and felt Seshiru’s walls contracted around her digits. 

At that moment in time, Seshiru could not have felt more alive. 

And Chigi had succeeded in making Seshiru be quite.

* * *

Chigi:

'I have work nearby so I decided to come and visit you,’ replied Seshiru answering Chigi’s question. Chigi didn’t believe her so she decided to interrogate her further.

'What work? What kind of work would there be in a small town like this?’ Chigi didn’t know why she was being so cold and distant, maybe because right now she just wanted to be left alone.

'Documentary. We’re filming a documentary.’

Chigi narrowed her eyes at Seshiru as she wasn’t convinced.

'It’s a travel documentary and it involves us going around the towns of Nagasaki.’ Said Seshiru with a straight face. Seshiru didn’t seem like she was lying but then again, Chigi had always found Seshiru very difficult to read. There was a slight pause between them.

'Well anyway, whatever you’re here for, I can’t play host-and-guest with you today,’ said Chigi not really looking at Seshiru while continuing to be cold and detached. Seshiru just stood there and looked at her with a blank expression.

'If you don’t mind, I think I’ll close the door now.’ Chigi said with a slight bow of the head as if to apologise for her disrespect and proceeded to close the door on a mute Seshiru.

However, just as the door was about to close, a foot came to lodge between the space and prevented the door from closing. Chigi peered through the remaining gap with confusion and saw an unamused Seshiru staring back at her. With force, Seshiru pushed the door open and squeezed past Chigi into her own home. Chigi was left with her mouth gaped open standing in front of the open door.

If anyone were to walk past Chigi’s house now, they would have definitely laughed at her current expression.

Feeling anger rise within her, Chigi snapped around and stormed after Seshiru who was heading for her living room.

'How dare you barge in like this?! You know I could call the police on you,’ said Chigi with a finger angrily pointed towards Seshiru. Seshiru spun around and then immediately started to walk towards Chigi in large, purposeful strides.

Chigi being slightly taken aback by this, started to stumble backwards until her back hit a wall. Seshiru only came to a stop when she was nose to nose with Chigi.

Even though Seshiru was shorter than Chigi, for some reason right now she seemed to be two metres tall and Chigi was slightly intimidated. At this close proximity, Chigi can see the fire in Seshiru’s eyes and she didn’t know why.

What is wrong with this woman?! What did she want?

Chigi could feel Seshiru’s chest rising and falling with her own and also Seshiru’s breathe on her lips. She wondered if Seshiru was about to kiss her.

After a few seconds of this intense staring contest, Seshiru relaxed her shoulders and took a step away from Chigi, giving them both some space.

'I won’t go until you talk to me.’ Said Seshiru turning around and walking towards the living room again.

Talk to her?! About what?

'There is nothing for me to talk to you about,’ said Chigi in an exasperated tone. She had no idea what this woman wanted. Chigi followed Seshiru into her own living room and saw that Seshiru had sat down on her sofa with her arms crossed looking up at Chigi

'Well, aren’t you going to offer your guest a drink?’

Chigi’s eyes widened and couldn’t believe the nerves on the woman sitting in front of her. In fact, she had being rendered speechless.

'Fine. If you’re not going to get it, I’ll get it myself.’

Seshiru stood up from the sofa and walked towards the kitchen past a very stunned Chigi. It’s not the first time Seshiru had being to Chigi’s house, therefore she was pretty familiar with where everything was.

Hearing the sound of cups being taken out of her cupboard behind her, Chigi snapped out of her daze and walked towards Seshiru in an angry fashion. She turned Seshiru around roughly by the shoulders and snatched the cup out of her hands and slammed it on the kitchen counter.

The sound seem to resonate throughout Chigi’s house and a silence then filled the air.

'I have nothing to talk to you about. So I would suggest you to show yourself out before I lose it.’

Chigi made sure she enounced every words clearly so Seshiru would get the idea. However instead of listening to Chigi, Seshiru grabbed hold of both of Chigi’s hands and placed them on the kitchen counter, one on each side of her body, entrapping herself.

Chigi was surprised and confused at this action which made Seshiru to internally giggle due to the cute expression present on Chigi’s face now.

Seshiru the leant forward and whispered against Chigi’s ears. 'I know why you’re like this and that’s why I’m here. To help you deal with it.

Seshiru lips brushed against Chigi’s ears which sent shivers down her spine. Chigi now knew what Seshiru’s intentions were but she was not in the mood for it, not today.

'It’s because  _Her_ isn’t it? It’s because you saw what was on the news.’ With her last words, Seshiru gently bite down on Chigi’s ear lobes and began to suck on it before Chigi pushed herself away from Seshiru as if she had been burnt.

'If you’re going to start talking about her I will personally throw you out myself.’ Chigi was definitely fuming now and Seshiru can see it in her eyes. Her beautiful, soulful eyes.

'Why? Are you scared? Are you scared of facing reality? Are you scared Miyu had found someone better than you,’ Seshiru spat out the words and every one of them felt like a stab in the chest for Chigi. Seshiru stalked slowly towards a very still Chigi who standing on the other side of the kitchen.

If looks could kill, Seshiru would be dead by now.

'I know you Chigi, in fact, I probably know you better than anyone else in the world.’ Seshiru was inches away from Chigi’s face again and she felt like she had entered a lion’s territory.

'Don’t think of yourself so highly,’ scoffed Chigi looking superiorly down at Seshiru, 'what makes you think you know me so well. Majority of the time we’re having sex so there is no way you could have gotten to know me.’ Hearing these words, Seshiru chuckled.

'See that’s where you’re wrong Chigi- _san_.’ Seshiru made sure to put an emphasis on 'san’ in an attempt to mock Chigi. 'I believe that in fact, you can learn a lot about a person by having sex with them.’ Chigi raised an eyebrow at this and dared Seshiru to carry on.

'Let’s take you for an example.’ Seshiru face became serious and Chigi can tell that she would not like where this was going.

'Every bite you place on my body, represents the pain you feel when you realise you have no future with Miyu.’ Hearing Miyu’s name, Chigi felt anger bubble within her. 

'Every searing kiss you place on my lips, reflects the passion you wish you had given to Miyu.’ Chigi clenched her hands into fists by her sides resisting every urge to punch someone/something.

'Every tear you shed when we are making love, represents the regret you feel for not doing it with Miyu.’ Chigi can feel her patience was just barely hanging from a thread now.

'Every 'f*ck me harder’ you say in bed, represents your desperation for pushing Miyu out of your mind.’ Chigi felt like she was about to be sick with every word expelled from Seshiru’s mouth.

However, what she did not hear, was Seshiru’s own voice breaking and Seshiru trying to choke back her own tears.

'Ever-’

Suddenly, a hard slap landed on Seshiru’s cheek which instantly stopped her from talking.

The only the sounds present in the whole building now, were the sounds of breathing and heart beating.

Seshiru’s hand slowly came up to hold her tender cheek and her hair had become a curtain between herself and Chigi, who was recovering from the adrenaline in her veins. Chigi can feel her hand buzzing from the painful contact, and part of her wondered if she should have done what she just did.

Then without warning, Seshiru whipped around and slapped Chigi back just as hard or maybe even harder.

Chigi’s mind was blank with shock as she felt blooding rushing to the side of the cheek where she was hit. With Chigi’s hand now clutching to her own cheek, she turned around and came face-to-face with a tear-filled Seshiru. Chigi noticed Seshiru’s cheek had turned pink from the contact. In fact, Chigi had also noticed how Seshiru was biting down on her bottom lip, trying not to cry.

Chigi blinked several times in confusion as she wondered why Seshiru had looked like she was about to cry.

Did Chigi strike her too hard? Maybe she should let Seshiru strike her once more? Was sh-

Then, feeling like a ton of bricks had just being dropped on her, realisation hit Chigi.

Everything Seshiru had just said, must have hurt Seshiru herself too. Chigi looked into Seshiru’s eyes and saw that they were filled with pain, angry and of course, tears and confirmed her suspicion.

Chigi immediately began to regret what she had just done and her heart began to ache for Seshiru. 

Every moment they had being together, it had always being about Chigi. It had always being about Chigi’s own ego and selfishness which meant Seshiru’s own needs and feelings had always came second or most of the time, neglected. And that every time they had sex, Chigi’s mind was always somewhere else, thinking about another person, when Seshiru’s focus and attention had always being on her. 

Of course. 

How could she not have noticed?

Seshiru loved her. 

Seshiru didn’t have some stupid documentary to film. Seshiru had come all this way just to come and see if Chigi was ok.

Right now, Chigi could not have felt more like an idiot and even more so, a complete loser for not being able to give what Seshiru wanted, to love her back. 

Staring at Seshiru with wide eyes, Chigi just realised how much Seshiru had done for her, and how painful it must have been for Seshiru all that time.

Just as Seshiru was about to land another slap on Chigi’s other cheek, Chigi grabbed Seshiru’s wrist and pulled her closer.

Then without hesitation, Chigi captured Seshiru’s lips with her own.


	10. Chapter 10

Chigi:

Chigi felt Seshiru stiffen with shock in her arms. She wasn’t sure what she was doing but this way she had prevented herself from being slapped again by Seshiru. Her cheek was still throbbing from the first and Seshiru’s cheek must have been as well. She didn’t like to see Seshiru like this, she didn’t love her, but it was still painful for her to see her friend hurting like this.

However, it’s being a while and there was still no response from Seshiru and Chigi wondered if Seshiru had turned into stone. Chigi decided to move her mouth slightly and pressed further into Seshiru lips. This seemed to trigger a response from Seshiru as she immediately began to struggle from Chigi’s arms and began to thrash her fists into Chigi’s chest. Despite the painful attacks, Chigi did not let go and kept their lips locked together while she waited for Seshiru to calm down.

After a while, Seshiru stopped with her trashing and her hands dropped down to her sides in defeat. Chigi then felt Seshiru’s salty tears mixed in with their kiss and decided it was best to pull away from Seshiru. Then using her hand, Chigi gently placed Seshiru’s head onto her shoulder while embracing her close. Her shoulder was slowly becoming wet with Seshiru’s falling tears and she felt Seshiru was biting on her shoulder through the fabric of her clothes.

‘I’m sorry,’ Chigi began to whisper, ‘I was insensitive, I shouldn’t have hit you like that.’ This was the best she could do as she didn’t know what else to say. Seshiru continued to remain still and quiet in her arms.

They continued to hold this position for a while and this gave them both a moment to breath. Then suddenly out of nowhere, Chigi started to hear a small chuckle coming from the woman she was embracing and Chigi must have thought Seshiru had gone mad.

She then cautiously started to push herself away from Seshiru a little so she could see Seshiru’s face and work out what was going on. A smile had broken out on Seshiru’s face.

Ok, maybe she had gone crazy.

‘I’m sorry,’ said Seshiru in the middle of her fit of giggles, ‘forgive me for laughing, but I’m just finding all of this all too funny.’

Eh? Is this woman ok?!

‘It’s just that,’ Seshiru wiped her eyes a bit and carried on, ‘I came here with the intention to comfort you, not the other way round.’ Seshiru let out a laugh again and Chigi thought kami-sama must be having a laugh with her.

‘I, I want to apologize for what I did again,’ Chigi said sincerely, ‘I should not have hit you let that.’ Chigi finished by looking down at her feet as she was truly ashamed. After a few seconds of no reply from Seshiru, Chigi looked up and she saw a small pout had formed on Seshiru’s face who then struck her playfully on the shoulder.

‘You should be,’ said Seshiru with a grin on her, however her eyes were still red from the tears, ‘it still hurts.’ Despite hearing those words, Chigi knew she was forgiven because she saw the forgiveness in Seshiru’s eyes. Feeling more relieved, a small smile then appeared on Chigi’s face.

‘Hey you hit me back as well so I guess we’re even,’ said Chigi in a playful tone of her own. Seshiru struck on Chigi’s shoulders again and Chigi let out a false groan pretending to be in pain. Then out of nowhere, the pair started to laugh together. Their laugher sounded throughout the whole house and it was definitely a therapeutic moment for both of them.  

As their laugher died down, an air of awkwardness started to creep between the two. The two had stepped away from each other and there was a comfort distance between them. Chigi decided she should break the tension and say something.

‘Um,’ said Chigi while scratching the back of her head, ‘so, would you like anything to drink?’ Seshiru let out a laugh and said ‘just water would be fine thanks.’

‘Um, sure. I can get that for you,’ said Chigi, ‘um, you’re welcome to go to the living room, if you want.’ This earned another laugh from Seshiru and Chigi felt a blush rising to her cheeks.

‘Ok, I’ll go and wait for you,’ said Seshiru as she started to walk towards the living room. When Seshiru was out of sight, Chigi let out a sigh and placed her hands on the kitchen counter.

Jesus Christ, what just happened? She couldn’t believe how this day had played out.

Finding the cup she had slammed on the kitchen counter earlier, she brought the kettle over and filled it with water. As she was pouring, she wondered how she was going to face Seshiru now. What should she say to her? What should they talk about?

Not really paying attention to what she was doing, Chigi had overfilled the cup and the water was flowed down the sides of the cup and onto the kitchen counter.

‘Damn it!’ Swore Chigi as she grabbed the nearby towel and wiped down the surface.

‘Is everything ok?’ shouted Seshiru from the living room, Chigi couldn’t be more embarrassed.

‘Y-yeah it’s fine, I’ll be coming in a sec.’ Gosh why can’t she get a grip of herself!

Once she had wiped up all the spilt water, she picked up the cup and walked into the living room. Seshiru was sitting there with a straight but relaxed posture and what Chigi didn’t know was that, Seshiru was also finding the situation slightly awkward.

When Chigi had placed the cup in front of Seshiru on the coffee table, which earned a small ‘ _arigatou_ ’ from Seshiru, Chigi cautiously took a seat next to Seshiru but kept a comfortable distance. The room became quiet and the pair looked around the room wondering who was going to speak first, IF, they were going to speak.

After a while, the silence had become too unbearable for Chigi so she decided to say something, ‘um,’ Chigi cleared her throat and began, ‘so, I guess you’re wanting to talk about, to talk about Miyu with me.’ This is a topic she hadn’t been willing to talk about but it was a necessity now (otherwise this silence would continue forever). Chigi glanced over carefully to Seshiru to see what her reaction was. She didn’t want to tread on anymore toes so she was being extra vigilant and sensitive.

Seshiru remained quiet for a moment and said, ‘if _talkin_ g is what you want to do.’

Chigi knew the suggestion behind Seshiru’s words but yes, talking is what she wanted to do, in fact probably the better thing to do from now on. Therefore without much consideration she replied, ‘yes, I’d like us to talk.’

For a short while, Seshiru’s eyes scanned over Chigi’s features as if to check if she was genuine or not. But content with her own conclusion, Seshiru sat back and gave a small nod to Chigi as if to tell Chigi to carry on.

Knowing Seshiru is ok with her talking on, Chigi started to speak, ‘Um… to be honest, there’s nothing much I can say about Miyu,’ Seshiru gave her a raised eyebrow but Chigi carried on, ‘she looked happy, with that guy I mean, and if she’s happy, I’m happy as well.’

It was obvious from the look Seshiru was giving her that Seshiru wasn’t convinced. Chigi wasn’t sure if she meant what she had said either but she was desperately trying to convince herself of it. Having said that, she wanted nothing more than Miyu to be happy.

Next to her, Seshiru let out a deep sigh and said, ‘what they showed in the pictures is one thing and the reality is another. The photos were only a snapshot of Miyu at that particular moment in time, it did not capture the whole story.’ Chigi remained quiet as she cannot argue with that.

‘In fact for all we know, Miyu could have been forced to go on the date with the guy,’ Chigi felt something rise within her because the idea of forcing Miyu to do anything didn’t sit well with her. ‘For all we know, it was just a normal dinner date between two co-workers,’ Chigi can feel Seshiru’s eyes on her, waiting for her to say something.

‘Seshiru, you’re right, I don’t think anyone else in the world know me more than you do. So I think you’ll understand when I tell you this,’ Chigi said now looking deeply into Seshiru’s eyes.

‘I love Miyu,’ for a moment Chigi saw a flash of hurt in Seshiru’s eyes but right now it was important for her to finish what she was saying, ‘I love that woman so much to point where I almost hate myself for it and wished these feelings would go away. There is nothing I want more than to be where that guy was and to be next to Miyu.’

Seeing Seshiru had taken it all in, Chigi continued with her monologue, ‘however, you and I both know that this is becoming more and more impossible. Even if Miyu did love me back, would she be willing to sacrifice her career for me? Would she be willing to give up all her potentials for a relationship that may or may not last? Would she not regret it in the end? See, these are the questions that always pop up in my mind when I think of a possible future with Miyu. This is why I’m reluctant to talk about her and this is why I think a future is not possible between us.’ Chigi took a deep breath and felt like she had just got something heavy off her chest. Looks like talking was the better choice to do.

Chigi was still looking at Seshiru and Seshiru looked like she was truly considering Chigi’s words and Chigi wondered what Seshiru was going to say to her.

‘Chigi I’m not going to try and convince you that Miyu loves you or what not, because I know it will not work. You, may be the most stubborn person I have met,’ said Seshiru with a small smile on her face, ‘All I can say is and wish for is that you would spend more time with her, just the two of you. Give her the chance to talk with you and you with her.’ Chigi listened to Seshiru’s words but part of her was still reluctant.

Did Miyu really love her? Will a relationship really work out between them?

Again, Chigi didn’t think so but for some reason everyone else did. Chigi was at lost at what to think and say. Everyone who seemed to know her has one way or another had tried to persuade her to seek out a relationship with Miyu. Sometimes she did wonder if everything would be made easier if she just confessed her feelings to Miyu. So much weight would be lifted from her shoulders.

‘Um, we’re actually seeing each other soon,’ Chigi said, ‘maybe one of us will try and speak to each then.’ Chigi wasn’t exactly lying but she wasn’t telling the truth either. Of course, Chigi and Miyu will speak to each other, but the subject of their conversation will probably not stray into the area of ‘love and relationships’. This is the best promise she can make and the best she could do to deal with Seshiru’s request.

‘Then that is your chance. Like you said, the probability of you and Miyu getting together are getting more and more impossible,’ Seshiru said with a sincere face, ‘with Miyu’s busy schedule and your stubborn character, this may be one of your last chances to sort out the mess between you two.’

Chigi knew Seshiru must be hurting herself when she is saying this and right now she couldn’t be happier to have a selfless friend like her. Chigi gave a slow nod because the least she could do is to agree with Seshiru and give her a peace of mind.

‘Good! Well I think my work here is done,’ said Seshiru suddenly standing up.

‘Eh?! Are you not going to stay a bit longer?’ Asked Chigi slightly puzzled and alarmed.

That’s it? Seshiru is just going to go now.

‘Yeah, well what else is there for me to do?’ Said Seshiru in a slightly sarcastic fashion. Chigi wanted to say something but Seshiru was right, there wasn’t anything more Seshiru could do. With that, Chigi slowly got up from where she was sitting ready to send out her guest.

For a moment, both stood there awkwardly in the middle of Chigi’s living room with eyes not knowing where to look. Chigi debated whether if she should insist Seshiru to stay a bit longer because she wanted to accommodate for her previous behaviour towards her.

All of the sudden, Seshiru stepped forward and went on her tip toes to plant a gentle kiss on Chigi’s cheek. This gave Chigi a little surprised but it was a nice, welcomed surprise.

As Seshiru came down from her tip toes, her face came face to face with Chigi and they were inches apart. Seshiru’s lips hovered over Chigi’s and Chigi thought Seshiru was about to kiss her, which she was willing to let Seshiru do. However, instead Seshiru planted her feet fully on the ground and said, ‘Ok I guess I’ll see you some time in the future then.’ Chigi saw a smile on Seshiru’s face but she wasn’t sure if it was genuine or just there to put on a brave face.

When Seshiru turned around to leave, Chigi stopped her by grabbing her wrist. This seemed to be an involuntary action but Chigi didn’t really mind. Seshiru turned around slowly to face her with a confused expression.

‘Stay,’ Chigi said simply, ‘it’s too dark outside and there won’t be many trains around here. I don’t want you waiting in the dark like this.’ Chigi’s thumb ran over the soft flesh of Seshiru’s wrist as an attempt to persuade her because she really was worried for Seshiru.

Seshiru turned around to face Chigi fully and then did something totally unexpected. She stepped forward and kissed Chigi again but this time on Chigi’s lips. This caught Chigi totally by surprise and stilled her where she stood. Then slowly Seshiru pulled back.

‘I’ll only stay if you’re willing to spend the night with me,’ said Seshiru while her forehead rested on Chigi’s. Chigi registered what Seshiru had just said and was currently considering what she should do.

Seshiru didn’t sound like she was begging, in fact Seshiru sounded like as if she was testing Chigi, expecting Chigi to say no. For a while Chigi did not talk, and probably taking this as an answer, Seshiru started to pull away again.

But for some reason, this loss of contact triggered something in Chigi, whose hands immediately went up to cup Seshiru’s face and locked their lips together. This time it was Seshiru’s turn to be stilled. Chigi’s lips moved tenderly against Seshiru’s which was so unlike their previous kisses. Chigi’s tongue ran along the bottom of Seshiru’s lips exploring a sensation she hadn’t felt with Seshiru before. Then, she felt Seshiru’s arms come around to wrap themselves around her waist and reciprocating the kiss.

When they had become breathless, Chigi pulled away and placed a kiss on Seshiru’s forehead.

‘Ok. One last time, for old times’ sake,’ said Chigi with a gentle smile on her face and she saw the stunned expression on Seshiru’s face.

‘And this time, it’ll just be me and you, no one else.’ Chigi wondered if Seshiru knew what she had meant by that, but not a second later, it seemed like realisation had hit Seshiru because her arms threw themselves around Chigi’s neck and her lips crashed into Chigi’s. Chigi smiled into this kiss and with one sweeping motion, she picked up Seshiru into a bridal carry.

Shock was written all over Seshiru’s features and Chigi couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

Maybe this one time, she could give what Seshiru what she wanted. Her love and undivided attention.


	11. Chapter 11

Miyu:

It was quarter to two in the morning and Miyu and MoMo were still in Miyu’s living room. The TV played in the background while MoMo lay stretched out on the sofa and Miyu sat on a nearby by chair. The pair hadn’t been able to fall asleep due to the fact that MoMo decided to order take-away a couple of hours ago and both were still trying to digest the food in the stomachs. Miyu learnt that when MoMo was stressed out, she liked to indulge herself in as much food as possible (and the people around her too).

MoMo had been staring at her phone while lying down and Miyu wondered how long would MoMo’s eye sight last at this rate. She also wondered what MoMo was looking at because from time to time MoMo would burst out laughing while reading something from her phone. Miyu wished she could take a peak too. 

It was not the first time Miyu had been left out from someone else’s entertainment, in fact she’s fairly used to it, used to the fact she sat in the background observing the others around her like a wallflower.

* * *

Flashback:

(Miyu POV) Finally it was time for a break and everyone immediately scurried over to their bags to grab out their phones and snacks. Over the weekend, Miyu had made herself some macarons which she was currently excited to share it out with the other Yukigumi members. 

When she got to her bag, she plopped down on the bench and took out the box containing the sweet confection. She took special care to make them look pretty with each one having a different colour and flavour which made them even more appetising.

One of them was different from the others though. This special one was cherry-red in colour and shaped like a heart. Miyu smiled to herself as she already knew who she wanted to give this too. 

Since Valentine’s Day was close, she wanted to do something special for her Top-san and what better idea was there to bake a pastry in the shape of heart. Her heart was beating fast because she didn’t know how she was planning to give it to Chigi-san or how Chigi-san would react. Having said this, she felt as giddy as a school girl and as excited as a kid on Christmas Day. 

Suddenly from a few benches along, she heard a laugher, a laughter which belonged to no other than Chigi-san. 

From where she was, Miyu saw that Chigi-san was in the company of some other musumeyakus, having some sort of conversation. At that moment, Chigi-san’s head was thrown back in laughter while one the musumeyakus placed one of her hands on Chigi’s thigh and the other over her own mouth covering her own laugh. 

Not only did Miyu feel jealous at this scene, she also wished she was part of the conversation and was able to make Chigi-san laugh like that herself. 

Chigi-san’s smile was one of Miyu’s favourite things in this world: the way the corner of her lips curved up, the way she squinted her eyes and the way a small dimple would appear at the corner of her mouth. It was almost infectious because every time Chigi-san smiled, it made Miyu want to as well. 

With the box of macarons still opened in her lap, she continued to watch Chigi-san from afar while wishing she was one of them. As she let out a sigh, she wondered how she was going to give Chigi-san this gift now. 

Without noticing, Reiko had come and sat down next to her and when Reiko spoke, it caused Miyu to jump slightly.

‘What have you got there Miyu-chan? Ooo, a heart-shaped macaron?’ This seemed to knock Miyu out of her trance and bought her focus onto Reiko.

'Oh it’s nothing! Just something I baked over the weekend…,’ said Miyu in a melancholy and crushed tone while looking back down at the box on her lap. Her fingers traced over the edge of the box pondering as to whether she should put the lid back on. 

Reiko registered Miyu’s weird behaviour and went to search with her eyes the thing Miyu was looking at before Reiko sat down next to her. When she had found what Miyu had been looking at, Reiko immediately understood.

'Go for it Miyu-chan,’ said Reiko.

'Eh?’ replied Miyu now looking at Reiko with confused, wide eyes. Was Reiko able to read her?

'Go and give it to Chigi-san, that one is for her right?’ Reiko pointed to the cherry-red macaron and Miyu’s face immediately flushed with embarrassment. Reiko let out a small laugh and proceeded to nudge Miyu with her elbow, 'I’m sure Chigi-san will love it! Since it’s made by Miyu-chan herself, I’m sure Chigi-san will be over the moon,’ said Reiko giving Miyu a bright smile. 

With that, Miyu looked up at Reiko and said, 'you think so?’ Reiko responded by giving her an enthusiastic nod and a thumbs up. And just like that, a wave of braveness surged through Miyu’s body and she instantly stood up with an air of purpose. 

She was going to do it! No musumeyaku will ever get in the way between her and Chigi-san! 

Taking a deep breath and giving a firm nod back to Reiko, she turned around and started to walk towards Chigi-san (and her current group of musumeyakus). 

(Chigi POV) She didn’t think the musumeyakus in Yukigumi were this funny! They had just been telling Chigi about a prank they played on Shou with the help of Saki and its hilarious outcome. Sometimes Chigi really felt sorry for Shou, but it is stories like this that makes Chigi glad they have someone like Shou in their troupe to play pranks on. 

When she returned her head back to normal position from her outburst of laughter, a little farther away from her, she noticed Miyu conversing with Reiko.

Almost immediately, her sense of humour was gone and replaced with mild bitterness and annoyance. The musumeyakus next to her were still talking but at this point Chigi had drowned out their voices and was currently looking at Miyu and Reiko with stalking eyes. 

But all of the sudden, Miyu stood up and Chigi wondered what had happened. When she saw Miyu turn towards her, Chigi looked away and pretended to divert her attention back to the musumeyakus next to her. Hopefully, Miyu hadn’t noticed Chigi looking at her.

(Miyu POV) As Miyu headed towards Chigi with the box of macarons clutched tightly in her hands, she held her breath and walked with determination. If any third person was watching now, it would look like a school girl about to hand a confession letter to the most popular boy in school.  

When she was about 2 meters away from her target, Chigi and her group of musumeyakus looked up at her with puzzled and expecting eyes. 

Miyu felt like she was going to hurl.

(Chigi POV) From the corner of her vision, she saw Miyu starting to walk towards her. For some reason she started to feel a bit nervous and she wondered why Miyu was approaching her. It looked like she was holding onto a box of something.

When she got closer and closer, the musumeyakus had stopped talking as they had also noticed Miyu’s presence. 

'Miyu-chan! Are you ok? Is there anything you wanted?’ Asked Ei-chan beside Chigi. Chigi was observing Miyu’s every facial expression and body language very carefully. Every sign and movement told Chigi that she was nervous and slightly uncomfortable. Miyu’s mouth seemed to open and close as she tried to form her words.

'Um, I-I’d like to talk to Chigi-san please,’ said Miyu in a timid tone. Hearing her name, Chigi’s curiosity immediately peaked as she wondered why Miyu had wanted to talk to her. 

However next to her, she could feel the other musumeyakus giving her wagging eyebrows, already teasing her the hell out of her. 

Ok maybe it would be a better idea if she and Miyu went somewhere else to talk, out of sight from these snooping eyes. 

'Sure Miyu let’s go somewhere more quite because currently I’m having a hard time hearing you above all these noisy obasans talking next to me.’ Chigi was feeling extra cheeky right now.

After saying this, Chigi received a few painful jabs and strikes on the shoulder from the musumeyakus beside her but Chigi thought she was hilarious. Others may have thought her current mental age was of a 3 year old. 

As she hastily got away from the obasans next to her while chuckling, she got up and led Miyu by her arm outside the rehearsal room and closed the door behind them. After that, she turned around and faced Miyu. 

'What is it you want to talk to me about?’ said Chigi in a hushed tone. She didn’t know why she was whispering. Chigi observed that Miyu had her head down and seemed to be fidgeting with the box in her hands. Chigi looked down and saw that the box was filled with multi-coloured macarons. However, one of them was slightly bigger than the others and it was in the shape of a cherry-red heart, her favourite colour. Chigi looked up at Miyu’s face again waiting for her reply.

'Chigi-san, I-I baked some macarons… an-and I was wondering if you’d like one,’ said Miyu in a quiet voice, so quiet that Chigi almost didn’t hear her, but she did. Miyu finished this by looking into Chigi’s eyes. 

Chigi’s heart skipped a beat because she couldn’t stand it when Miyu looked at her like this. Feeling her face becoming red, Chigi cleared her throat and looked away.

'Well, only if they taste nice,’ said Chigi with a false sense of superiority, teasing Miyu. She stole a quick look at Miyu to see what her reaction was and it was just as she had expected. Miyu’s face flushed like crazy and her mouth was furiously trying to form words to respond to Chigi’s teasing reply.

'O-of course they taste good! I-I had a taste of them myself and they were delicious!’ Chigi can see Miyu was desperately trying to present her case and she couldn’t help but to laugh internally to herself.

Clearing her throat again, Chigi continued on with her tease, 'oh really? Well let me be the judge of that,’ as she said this, she folded her arms and gave Miyu a sideways look. Not a second later, Chigi could see anger bubbling onto Miyu’s face and Chigi have not seen a cuter sight.

With one hand, Miyu picked up the heart-shaped macaron and offered it angrily towards Chigi. Chigi being the mischievous brat she was, pretended to inspect the macaron with an unimpressed expression while bending down which only offended Miyu even further. 

Just as Miyu was about to withdraw her macaron, Chigi suddenly grabbed her wrist and pulled her close. She then took a bite out of the macaron while it was still held by Miyu. Miyu’s eyes widened at Chigi’s action and Chigi couldn’t be merrier.

As she was chewing, Chigi pretended to judge the flavour while making pensive noises even though this was the most delightful macaron Chigi had ever had. Of course, she was not going to say this in front of Miyu.

'It’s not bad I guess…’ said Chigi in a causal tone, still observing Miyu to see what her reaction was. 'Umm, I’d give it an 8!’ Miyu’s eyes widened and a bright smile appeared on her face.

'Really Chigi-san!’ gasped Miyu in excitement.

'Out of 100,’ Chigi immediately retorted with a smirk on her face. Miyu smile instantly collapsed.

'EHHH?! Nani?!’ Whined Miyu. Chigi liked it when she got this reaction from Miyu.

'Well I guess you just gunna have to try harder next time,’ said Chigi to a very defeated looking Miyu who had her shoulders slightly slumped and a pout on her face. 

Thinking Miyu had probably being teased enough for now, Chigi couldn’t resist but to bop Miyu on the nose and say, 'I was only joking, it was delicious.’

Hearing this, Miyu’s spirit seemed to return to her and her big grin reappeared.

'But. I expect better next time, if I don’t see an improvement, I’ll never eat your bakes again,’ warned Chigi but of course she was joking. She lived for Miyu’s bakes. 

Miyu gasped and all of the sudden her game-face appeared, 'Hai! I will definitely do better next time.’ Miyu’s face was so full of determination Chigi thought she might not be able to contain her laughter.

'Good I’m glad you have that in mind,’ said Chigi as if she was a teacher talking to a student. Chigi was definitely enjoying herself.

'Righty-ho then! Let’s get back to rehearsals!’ said Chigi as she gave Miyu a wave before entering the room herself. Chigi was worried if she stayed too long with Miyu by herself, the obasans from earlier would be wondering things and letting their imagines run wild. As we all know, this was definitely not something Chigi wanted. 

However after Chigi had re-entered the room, Miyu stood there for a few more seconds in shock and astonishment replaying the words Chigi had just said to her.

Not only did Chigi compliment her on her food, Chigi had also basically given her the permission to bake more for her in the future. 

Miyu felt like she could soar across the sky and never come down. She was that high. 

* * *

Miyu:

As the clock ticked by, Miyu felt her eye lids getting heavier and heavier. She was about to get up to go to bed when suddenly like a knife cutting through the silence, her private mobile beeped.

Both hers and MoMo’s ears pricked up like a dog hearing a car coming up the drive way. At this time of the night who could be calling? It couldn’t have been the agency. Was it Haruto-kun?

Reaching for her phone in her pocket immediately, she looked at the sender. 

It was from Reiko. Confusion filled Miyu’s mind.

Why would Reiko be texting her at this time of the day. Reiko rarely texted her anyway, even though she texted Miyu the most out of all the other Yukigumi members. 

Swiping across her screen to unlock her phone, Miyu read Reiko’s message.

_Hi Yuumi chan, I hope you are all well. As you probably expected, I have seen the news today and questions came to my mind immediately. However, knowing you, I know none of it is true so I don’t want you to worry and I want you to know that I_ _’m on your side. Ganbatte Miyu-chan!_  

_Anyway, the reason for this text is not only about me telling you my support for you, but also something else. It is concerning Chigi-san._

Eh?! 

Miyu’s mind began to ring alarm bells at reading the Chigi-san’s name.   
  
 _For all of today, Saki and Hitoko, even Shou, had tried to contact Chigi-san but receiving not a single reply from her. We think there might be something wrong and we are getting more and more worried._

Miyu was panicking immensely now. Why wasn’t Chigi-san replying to any of their messages? Did something happen?

_Therefore we were hoping you can help us. You are our last resort. If you call Chigi-san, she will probably pick up. Please help us, we are relying on you_.

_Thank you and let’s get together soon. XX_

\- Reiko

Eh?! Why me? Surely if the others hadn’t succeeded Miyu wouldn’t either.

Having observed Miyu’s multitude of changing facial expressions from the sofa, MoMo finally got up and came over to Miyu to see what was going on. 'Miyu you ok? You look worried, who was that?’

Still with an extremely concerned expression, Miyu handed her phone over to MoMo who started to read over the text message.

'Chigi-san hadn’t being replying to any of their messages and they’re worried that something might have happened to her,’ Miyu said while looking up at MoMo who was still reading the text, 'and I’m starting to worry too… why wasn’t Chigi-san replying?’ Miyu looked down at her hands and began to fidget nervously. Distress was written all over Miyu’s face.

Then from the corner of her eyes, Miyu saw her personal manager starting to do something on her phone.

'Eh?! What are you doing?’ Said Miyu trying to snatch her phone back from MoMo. But MoMo was fast and dodged Miyu’s attempts.

'I’m calling your precious Chigi-san,’ said MoMo trying to find Chigi’s phone number high in the air away from Miyu’s reach.

Miyu froze and stopped what she was doing for a second.

'EHHHH??!! Why???’ Miyu was now physically jumping up and down to retrieve her phone but alas, MoMo was too tall for her.

'Because, you, need to talk to her,’ said MoMo calmly despite the physical efforts she was making to get away from Miyu.

'But right now?! It’s nearly 02:30!’ Miyu’s legs had never worked so hard before as she desperately tried to jump up and down trying to get hold of MoMo’s arms, 'pleaaaaase don’t do it.’ Miyu felt like she was about to cry.

'Oops too late now, it’s already dialling,’ said MoMo now handing Miyu’s phone back to her as if nothing had happened. Miyu retrieved her phone with both hands and looked at it as if it was a foreign object not knowing what to do with it. 

Her phone was currently displaying 'call in progress’ for Chigi-san.

'If you hang up now, it would appear as missed call on Chigi’s phone. Either way Chigi would know you called,’ said MoMo next to her while playing with her own phone again.

Miyu shot a deadly look towards MoMo but MoMo ignored it. Right now, Miyu could think of a million ways to kill MoMo.

Her thumb was over the 'End call’ button but Miyu had to admit it, MoMo was right, either way Chigi-san would know that she had called. 

Giving up, she pressed the phone next to her ears while her heart drummed rapidly in her chest.

Suddenly, the line became clear and Miyu felt her heart had jumped up to her throat. A person had picked up.

'Hello?… Who this is?’

The person speaking sounded sleepy and also slightly annoyed. But the only problem was, this wasn’t Chigi-san’s voice.

Confused, Miyu took her phone away from her ears and read the name of the person she was dialling. 

Huh? 

The name displayed was Chigi-san but the voice on the other end was not. 

Because Miyu did not reply immediately, the person said 'hello’ again.

Deciding it was probably best to say something, Miyu said cautiously, 'Um hello? I think I may have got the wrong number….’

There was a slight pause on the other end and Miyu thought maybe she should just hang up. She didn’t want to disturb whoever this was from sleeping. Maybe there was something wrong with her phone.

Then as if a bucket of cold water had being poured on her, the person on the other end spoke.

'Miyu-chan?!’

Wait what?

How did she know Miyu’s name?

Actually, this voice sounded familiar…

Miyu felt like knew her.

No, she definitely knew her…  
  
  
  
Wait.  
  
Hold on.  
  
Wasn’t this…  
  
  
  
'Seshiru-san?!’


	12. Chapter 12

Chigi:

(Seshiru POV) Seshiru did not want to sleep, instead for the past hour or so, she had been lying on her side watching the person next to her. Chigi was sleeping on her front, still fully nude, with her head turned towards Seshiru. From Seshiru’s current perspective, Chigi looked endearing, just like an innocent child.

Seshiru wondered what Chigi was dreaming about because from time to time, she would let out an odd mumble or a funny facial expression. Seshiru would then try her best not to giggle because it might wake Chigi up. Even though her own eye lids were threatening to close shut, Seshiru was determined not to let this precious moment go to waste. She was going to savour every second of this because deep down, she had a feeling that this was going to be the last time. Immediately, a sense of sadness and longing washed over her.

She brought up a hand and pushed a stray hair off Chigi’s forehead which was blocking the view to her beautiful face. Seshiru allowed her fingers to linger on Chigi’s face because she could not resist the temptation.

Her fingers traced over Chigi’s features; from her eyes down to her nose and then down to her mouth. When she got to Chigi’s mouth, her thumb ran across Chigi’s lips and enjoyed the feeling of the soft flesh below her digit. At this moment in time, there was nothing Seshiru wanted more than to have Chigi all to herself.

But of course, Seshiru knew Chigi would never receive true happiness from being with her. And if Chigi wasn’t happy, Seshiru would not live in peace either. With this thought in mind, Seshiru let out a regretful sigh and her hand went to cup Chigi’s cheek.

Then shifting her body weight, she moved closer to Chigi’s warm body with the intention of planting a kiss on her lips. Hopefully, Chigi would not mind her doing so.

Just as she was millimetres away from capturing Chigi’s lips, a loud phone chime cut through the silence of the night from a corner of the room. The noise rang through the whole room and Seshiru shot up from the bed trying to locate the phone before it wakes up Chigi.

Then finally finding the illuminated piece of hand-device, without thinking, she answered.

‘Hello?… Who is this?’

Her voice came out sleepier than she had expected but there was also a tint of annoyance. Maybe whoever this was would take the hint. Seshiru could not be more annoyed at the fact that they had disturbed her time with Chigi.

Nevertheless, the individual on the other end remained quiet and Seshiru began to wonder if this was one of those nuisance calls.

'Hello?’ Seshiru tried again. This time her voice was much clearer and focused. And then almost abruptly, a timid voice spoke out.

'Um hello? I think I may have got the wrong number…’

Oh for goodness sake! Why did the wrong number have to be her phon-

Wait. Hold on.

This voice…

Could this be-?

No bloody way…

Seshiru immediately pulled the phone away from the side of her head and read the caller’s name.

'Miyu-chan?!’

No matter how hard she tried, Seshiru could not stop the name from escaping her mouth.

Seshiru had just accidently answered Chigi’s phone and the person calling was Sakihi Miyu.

Oh shit oh shit oh shit!

Heart beating at 100 mph, Seshiru waited for Miyu to say something, anything!

'Seshiru-san?!’

Oh no, Miyu had recognised her.

What should she do now? Should she hang up? Should she remain quiet? Seshiru’s mind was now in full panic mode.

'Seshiru-san is that you?’ Said Miyu slightly more desperately this time. Seshiru’s mind was working at maximum power figuring out what to do.

Chigi definitely did not want Miyu to find out why Seshiru was at Chigi’s house at this time of the night.

Why has the world done this to her now?!

'Seshiru-san? Why do you have Chigi-san’s phone? Is she there?’ Miyu spoke slowly but Seshiru can tell there was a tone of concern and maybe, just maybe, a small hint of jealousy.

Suddenly, she heard a mysterious voice on the other end, 'who is it Miyu-chan? Is this not Chigi-san?' Seshiru did not hear a reply from Miyu.

However instead, she heard the person on the bed behind her begin to stir in her sleep. When she turned around, she saw that Chigi was waking up.

(Chigi POV) Chigi’s eyes blinked open as she sensed movement around her. Feeling a bit disorientated, her mind slowly recalled the events that had happened today. Then realising that she was naked, she remembered that Seshiru was still here. Sluggishly, she rubbed her eyes with the knuckles of the hand and let out a tired yawn.

Her limb felt heavy as she went to search for the form who was supposed to be next her. Her arm moved across the bed but instead, Chigi just found empty bed sheets.

Where did Seshiru go?

Feeling slightly alarmed, her head bent back to scan around the room until she found Seshiru’s figure standing in the shadowy corner of the room. 'Seshiru what are you doing there,’ said Chigi in a confused voice which was still filled with sleep, 'are you not cold standing there like that, come back to bed.’ Chigi’s eyes were still trying to adjust to the darkness in her room.

Having said that, she was still able to see clearly enough to make out that Seshiru was holding onto a mobile phone with one hand, and with the other, vehemently giving Chigi the 'shush’ signal.

'Who is that on the phone Seshiru?’ Asked Chigi now slightly confused as to why Seshiru was telling her to be quite.

Seshiru did not reply but continued to give Chigi a desperate look on her face signalling her to be quiet. Chigi was now fully sat up on the bed and her concern grew for Seshiru.

'What’s wrong Seshiru? Who is it?’

Again, Seshiru continued to look at her with that same expression and Chigi decided it was probably best to approach her.

Grabbing a nearby T-shirt, Chigi hastily put it on and got out of bed. She walked towards Seshiru in bare feet who still wore an expression of horror on her face. Carefully, she placed her hand on Seshiru’s bare shoulder and asked, 'what? What’s wrong? Tell me?’

Still no reply.

Did something happen to one of Seshiru’s family members? Did Seshiru forget she had to be somewhere?

'Come on now, you’re scaring me,’ said Chigi in a joking fashion but in actual fact she was slightly worried. Seshiru was never the one to play pranks on her.

Instead of hearing a reply, Seshiru slowly handed the phone over to her. Eyes still trained on Seshiru, Chigi received the phone.

Seshiru’s face now wore a pained yet regretful look as she walked towards the bed quietly and proceeded to sit down on the corner, bring her gaze down to her feet.

Chigi’s worried eyes followed Seshiru’s every movement as she stood there holding the phone in her right hand.

Wondering why Seshiru was behaving this way, slowly, she raised the phone until the screen levelled with her line of vision. Instantly, she took note of the caller.

Oh.

As the realisation slowly hit her, Chigi began to regret every single word she had said so far.

That’s why Seshiru had kept quiet.

That’s why Seshiru had been signalling HER to be quiet.

Because why the hell was Sakihi Miyu calling her?!

* * *

Miyu:

Miyu waited for a response but none came. Her mind was filled with questions and she wanted some answers.

What was Seshiru-san doing with Chigi-san’s phone? Where was Chigi-san? Why was she still awake at this time of the night?

Again, it was just silence from the other end. Why wasn’t Seshiru talking to her? Was there something Seshiru didn’t want Miyu to know?

All of the sudden, she heard another person talking in the background.

'Seshiru what are you doing there?' It was Chigi-san. She sounded like she had just woken up as well.

'Are you not cold standing there like that, come back to bed,' Chigi continued to say.

Eh?

Come back to bed? Whose bed? And why would Seshiru be cold?!

However, still no reply from Seshiru.

'Who is that on the phone Seshiru-san?' Miyu wanted to scream her own name but no words came out. The phone she was holding trembled against her ear.

'What’s wrong Seshiru? Who is it?' Chigi’s voice was becoming closer and Miyu felt like she was going to be sick.

Why did Chigi-san use the words 'come back’?

'What? What’s wrong? Tell me?' Miyu can tell Chigi-san was next to Seshiru by now. Chigi-san’s voice was full of concern and a pan of jealousy shot through Miyu like lightening.

Why was worrying Chigi-san worrying about Seshiru being cold? Miyu was beginning to feel desperate.

'Come on now, you’re scaring me.' But in fact right now, no one was more scared than Miyu, because the fear of losing Chigi-san to someone else was slowly becoming a reality for Miyu.

Miyu didn’t know what was going on except for that fact that she did. Being the clever girl she was, of course she had already figured it out.

Because why else would person A be doing at person B’s house at 2:30 in the morning? Why else would person B be telling person A to come back to bed? Why else would person A be cold if person A wasn’t wearing much clothes?

Miyu didn’t want to believe it but reality was forcing her to. She wanted to hang up but her broken heart was preventing her from doing so.

Tears were building fast in Miyu’s eyes.

* * *

Chigi:

Chigi gradually brought the phone to her ears as her hand trembled in dread and the rest of her body frozen in place. At first, all she could hear was the sound of breathing from the other end. She was afraid to say anything because she was afraid to face Miyu. Chigi closed her eyes and waited for whatever was about to come.

After a few moments ofpainful silence, Miyu finally said something.

'Chigi-san?’

Oh how she had missed Miyu saying her name. The way she pronounced every syllable and the way her name rolled off Miyu’s tongue. Chigi longed to hear Miyu’s sweetness voice again but definitely not under this kind of circumstance.

Chigi swallowed the lump in her throat and choked out, 'Miyu-chan.’

Miyu MUST have worked it out, she must have.

As this thought resonated throughout Chigi’s mind, Chigi felt like she was losing her will to live. Chigi could feel her mouth becoming drier and drier by the second.

This was not the way Chigi had wanted for Miyu to find out about her 'private’ relationships. In fact, there was NEVER a plan for Miyu to find out about ANY of Chigi’s 'private’ relationships.

Another long pause followed, while Seshiru sat on the bed now looking up at Chigi with sad and worried eyes. However, Chigi was ignoring everything around her except for the piece of technology by her ear.

'I’m sorry… I-I shouldn’t have called,’ Miyu started to say in a meek fashion. Chigi could tell Miyu was finding it difficult to find the correct words to say.

Maybe she felt embarrassed for them (Chigi and Seshiru)?

Maybe Miyu was finding this situation too awkward and too sudden?

'Don’t apologise.’ Said Chigi with her eyes shut and a pained frown on her face. She proceeded to swallow another lump forming in her throat.

All she wished to do now, is to be beside Miyu, telling her face-to-face that Seshiru meant nothing to her and that her heart belonged to Miyu.

'I-I should be the one who is sorry.’

Chigi didn’t mean for this to come out of her mouth. But it was too late, she had already said it.

'For what?’ Chigi heard Miyu ask, she really wished she had kept her mouth shut.

'I-I don’t know,’ Chigi stuttered, 'just accept my apology.’ Chigi was beginning to panic.

'But for wha-?’

'Just accepted it!’ Demanded Chigi slightly too forcefully, which made Miyu (and Seshiru who was still sitting on the bed) to jump a little.

Her voice echoed throughout the house.

After that, it was silence again and all she could hear was Miyu’s soft breathing and the sound of her own heart beating.

At last, Miyu replied with a small 'Ok’.

Chigi immediately began to regret her outburst and the adrenaline in her head slowly dissipated.

'W-would you like me hang up Chigi-san?’ Miyu said almost in a whisper. Chigi’s heart wavered at hearing Miyu voice but she had to hold herself together.

'I-,’ Chigi started but could not finish. Miyu waited patiently on the other end for Chigi to continue.

'Maybe you should,’ Chigi said finally. This was probably the best thing to do, yet it was also the most painful thing to do for Chigi. She wanted to explain everything but she just couldn’t, because why would Miyu care?

'Ok… b-but before I do,’ Miyu began, 'I’d like to ask Chigi-san something… please.’ Hearing this, Chigi stiffened and anticipated what Miyu wanted to know.

About her and Seshiru? Was Miyu going to be that straightforward? No, the Miyu Chigi knew was not like that, unless she has changed that much of course.

'Sure… go ahead Miyu-chan,’ replied Chigi in the gentlest tone she could manage right now, Chigi felt like her heart was about to burst through her chest.

'A-are you ok Chigi-san?’ Said Miyu sounding unsure.

Chigi wanted to laugh.

Was she, Sagiri Seina, ok?

What kind of sick joke was this world playing on her now?

'Others have contacted me saying that you haven’t contacted them back,’ Chigi heard Miyu say, 'they seemed really worried so they wanted me to try…’

Oh, so that’s why Miyu had called.

'Maybe you should text them back…’ and with that, Miyu trailed off. Chigi had completely forgotten about the others and now she wished she hadn’t.

'Um… yeah, sorry, I forgot to reply,’ Chigi tried to come up with an explanation but her mind too all over the place right now, 'I’ll make sure to text them back as soon as possible.’ To be honest, she wondered if Miyu even cared because she did not hear a reply from Miyu, instead Miyu just remained quiet.

However, Chigi’s instincts were telling her something wasn’t right here…

There was a silence between them again and Chigi was at loss of what to do. Suddenly, Miyu said something completely unanticipated.

'Chigi-san?’ Miyu said in a voice that sounded broken, 'W-would, would you still like to meet up?’

Without taking note of the question Miyu had just asked her, Chigi decided to notice something else first instead. Miyu’s voice.

Why was Miyu’s voice breaking as she spoke?

Why was Miyu just sounding like as if she was about to cry?

No, something definitely wasn’t right here.

However, the question was still to be answered and Chigi didn’t know what to say.

'I-I don’t know?’ Chigi said with eyes closed, trying to clear her mind, 'do you?’ Chigi didn’t know what she wanted the answer to be because she was not in the correct state to make up her mind right now.

There was a long pause and Miyu finally said, 'Yes, I do.’

This surprised Chigi as she had really expected Miyu to say 'no’.

Maybe Miyu didn’t mind about her 'relationship’ with Seshiru? Maybe Miyu still wanted to be friends? But having said this, Chigi wanted Miyu to, Chigi wanted Miyu to mind very much about her being with other women. She wanted Miyu to fight for her.

Suddenly, the faint sound of sobbing interrupted her thoughts. It was coming from the phone.

Miyu was crying.

Feelings of utter confusion and helplessness immediately entered Chigi’s body.

'Chigi-san?’ said Miyu in the quietest voice ever. Chigi was right, something wasn’t right about the way Miyu spoke.

'Yes?’ Chigi said as she felt the huge lump return to her throat.

Why the in the world was Miyu crying?

Frustration filled Chigi’s mind as she tried to make sense of the current situation.

Gosh! Why was Miyu crying!

None of this was making any bloody sens-

'I miss you.’

A small, immediate gasp followed with it.

For a moment, time seemed to have stopped for Chigi.

She thought she had heard a penny drop to the floor.

That’s it.

3 words.

3 words was what it took for Chigi to realise something she should have a long time ago.

3 words was what it took for Chigi to finally understand why Miyu was crying.

3 words was what it took for Chigi to allow a single tear to roll down her cheek and hit the soft carpet of her bedroom.

Because these 3 words concealed another message, another message which also conveniently had 3 words.

Chigi thought she was losing her mind.

The person on the other end of the line was crying freely now but the person on this side of the line felt like she had just received a fatal blow to the heart and stood there perfectly speechless.

Despite the feeling of complete blankness she was currently experiencing, Chigi miraculously managed to get out something.

'I miss you too… Miyu-chan,’ her voice came out small and distant.

Chigi stared blankly into the wall in front of her. She had no idea what she had just said.

After a few moments of relentless sobbing from Miyu and continued silence from a stunned Chigi, Miyu managed to say amongst her hiccups, 'G-goodnight Chigi-san.’

Hearing Miyu’s voice again, Chigi mumbled a quiet 'night’ back as an automatic reply because still, she had no idea what she was saying. In fact, there was too much information for Chigi to handle right now and Chigi did not know what anything was anymore.

Then suddenly, the line went dead and a long *beep* filled Chigi’s hearing.

Miyu had hung up.

When a few more moments of stillness had passed, her arm dropped to the side of her body causing the phone to slip out from her hand, landing on the ground with a soft 'thump’.

Right now, only 3 words played through her mind.

3 words that meant the whole world to her.

3 words she thought she would never, ever hear herself say.

Fuck.

'Miyu loves me.’


	13. Chapter 13

Miyu:

‘Night.’

Miyu squeezed her eyes shut as she took in Chigi’s voice and her heart ached to the point where she feared it would finally break.

Something was pressing down on her chest as Miyu took a painful intake of air, trying to breathe normally again. Her shaky hand went up to clutch at the material above her own heart, attempting to stop it from breaking even further.

Miyu clenched her teeth together as she tried to stop the tears from flowing and whimpers from escaping. Her eye sight was also becoming more and more blurred as she felt her own tears fall onto her lap, creating a pool of moisture.

Unable to stand this suffering anymore, Miyu painfully lowered the phone and with her eyes shut, she ended the call.

She didn’t care if Chigi-san still wanted to speak.

She didn’t care if it was rude or disrespectful to hang up like that.  
  


All she cared about now was getting away as far as possible and as quickly as possible.

Having said this, Miyu could not be more confused.

She didn’t know why her body was reacting this way and she didn’t understand what was happening to her.

This was a feeling she had never felt before and it was definitely not something she enjoyed.

The conversation had become too unbearable for Miyu because no matter what Chigi said to her, Miyu could not get out of her mind that Seshiru was beside Chigi. Seshiru who was getting to love and care for Chigi and Seshiru who was getting to spend time with Chigi and touch her how ever she wanted.

Then feeling an immediate wave of anger come over her, Miyu throw her phone violently across the room where it smashed into the wall and fell uselessly onto the floor.

Miyu didn’t feel in control of her body anymore as she felt her arm swing the device far away from her body. She had decided to let her instincts lead her actions as it was simply the easiest thing to do right now.

She just didn’t want to think anymore.

'Oi! Calm down!’

MoMo had come over almost immediately to kneel in front the crying Miyu, whose eyes were fluffy and red. MoMo’s own eyes had been wide with shock and concern as she watched Miyu fling the phone across the room.

'Hey hey what happened?’ MoMo looked up at Miyu with gentle yet apprehensive eyes as she placed a comforting hand on Miyu’s shoulders. MoMo spoke in the softest tone as possible while she tried desperately to understand the situation.

Nonetheless, Miyu was unable to make any comprehensive sentences because there were too many emotions running through her right now, all wanting to dominate her body.

She tried her best to speak but it was an unsuccessful attempt.

'I-I Chi-g- an- Seshi-ru in-be to-ther,’ said Miyu amongst her crying and hiccups, 'I- shoul -n’t ’ve cal-’

MoMo tried her hardest to put the broken syllables together but it just didn’t work.

'It’s ok, it’s ok. Take your time,’ said MoMo as she began to rub the side of Miyu’s arm giving her some comfort. MoMo could feel Miyu’s body tremble while Miyu’s current state was starting to scare MoMo.

'I-shou-ave-cal-ed.’ Miyu said again amongst falling tears and erratic breathing.

'What?’ MoMo asked gently once more because Miyu really wasn’t making any sense.  
  


'I SAID I SHOULDN’T HAVE CALLED!’  
  


All of the sudden, Miyu pushed MoMo away forcefully and resulted in MoMo falling back onto her back with a stunned expression.

The room went silent for a moment and the only sound present was MoMo’s pained groan.

Realising what she had just done, Miyu gasped and covered her mouth with her hand with wide eyes. Her throat was sore from the scream she just let out.

Miyu became horrified at her outburst as she watched MoMo trying to sit up again while was rubbing her own back.

'I-I’m so sorry,’ Miyu stuttered out.

Gosh what had she become? Miyu stared at her own hands as if they weren’t hers and a state of panic took over her.

'I-I need t-to be alone right now.’

At once, she stood up and ran towards the direction of her bedroom.

She needed to be alone right now, before she hurts something or someone else.

(MoMo POV) MoMo placed her hand on her lower back as she tried to massage the area of pain while rolling on her side and sitting up. Her eyes were scrunched up from the mild agony and her mind was all over the place thinking what had happened.

Jesus Christ what the hell was going on?!

But before she had the chance to speak, MoMo saw that Miyu was already running off to her bedroom.

'Miyu where you going?!’ shouted MoMo after the disappearing figure of Miyu.

Whatever happened, it looked like it was slowly destroying Miyu and Miyu’s pain radiated so much that MoMo was feeling it too.

Getting on her two feet, MoMo chased after her. But alas, Miyu was too fast because when MoMo got to her bedroom entrance, Miyu had already slammed the door.

*BANG BANG BANG*

MoMo started to knock as forcefully as possible demanding Miyu to open up.

'Miyu open this door right now!’

No reply.

*BANG BANG BANG*

'Miyu! Talk to me for goodness sake!’

Still no reply.

Not giving up, MoMo pressed her ear to the door trying to hear what was going on. She slowed down her own breathing as she attempted to hear anything from opposite the door. However, when she did manage to hear, all she heard was the sound of Miyu’s relentlessly sobbing.

*BANG BANG BANG*

'Oi! Miyu! Come on! Talk to me!’ MoMo begged while her own voice became hoarse but Miyu still did not budge.

But after a few more useless tries, MoMo finally gave in.

Miyu wasn’t going to open the door until she was ready, she needed some space. Then slowly backing away from the door, MoMo decided to come to her own deductions.

Something must have happened during that phone call.

Miyu must have heard something she didn’t want to.

Also who was that Seshiru-san person?

Anyway, MoMo knew this HAD to be something to do with Chigi-san.

Then deciding it was time for her to take matters into her own hands, MoMo started to head downstairs again. She intended to search for the phone Miyu had thrown earlier.

When she had founded it, MoMo picked it up and saw that the screen had cracked but fortunately, it was still functioning. The cracks resembled a spider web and she wondered if this was what Miyu’s heart looked like now, shattered.

Then, something shiny flashed into her eyes as she noticed a snow shaped keyring lying a little further away from the phone. When she got closer to the object, she bent down and picked it up with her other hand.

MoMo moved the keyring around within the space of her palm as she began to make the link that the snow shape had something to do with Yukigumi, therefore, this must have held a great sentimental value for Miyu.

Realising this, she tucked it into the pocket of her trousers for safe-keeping. She had a feeling Miyu would want this back later.

Then returning her attention back to the phone, MoMo began to scroll through Miyu’s contacts, trying to find a phone number with one goal in sight.

If one person was going to make Miyu better, it was going to be Chigi-san.

With this thought engraved into her mind, she transferred Chigi’s number onto her own mobile and began to compose a text.

Chigi better have an idea on how to fix a broken Miyu. Because otherwise, MoMo was coming to get her.

* * *

Chigi:

'Miyu loves me.’

These word came out weakly from Chigi’s mouth while still having no idea of what she was saying. Her mind was currently being torn apart between reality and fantasy.

This was point where the two worlds crossed as the thought of Miyu loving her had only existed in Chigi’s own fantasy, up until now of course.

But now that it was becoming a reality, Chigi was finding it difficult to process, in fact, saying this was an understatement.

'What did you just say Chigi-san?’

Seshiru’s voice was soft and full of concern but Chigi did not hear her. Instead, her mind was somewhere far, far away, in a void of her own little world.

Miyu loves her.

Miyu loves her.

Miyu loves her.  
  


Her eyes were wide as she stood there perfectly still with these 3 words chanting again and again in her head. Her whole body felt numb as her mind took her along an endless circle.

Then, as if Kami-sama had struck her with a lightning bolt, the realisation suddenly became VERY real for Chigi.

Holy fuck, Sakihi Miyu was in love with her.  
  


At once, Chigi felt her sanity leave her body as she brought both of her hands up to clasp at her own head. Her fingers scrunched tightly at the roots of her hair, ignoring the pain.

Chigi started to feel dizzy as her legs began to fail below her. Chigi stumbled from where she stood until she crashed into the nearby cupboard where the objects on the wooden furniture fell as it shook with Chigi’s force. She attempted to stabilise herself with weak limbs and she was not succeeding.

Immediately, Seshiru jumped up from where she sat and grabbed Chigi by the arm preventing her from falling.

'CHIGI!’ Shouted Seshiru as she tried to catch Chigi.

Luckily, she had managed to get a hold of Chigi before she came crashing down onto the floor. Seshiru supported all of Chigi’s weight, until Chigi found stability within her own legs.

But this contact, Chigi’s head swung around and looked at Seshiru with wide eyes.

And as if she had being burnt, she jerked away, earning a small startled gasp from Seshiru.

'Leave.’ Said Chigi with an unreadable expression but even a blind man could tell she was dangerous to approach right now.

But ignoring this, Seshiru continued to take a concerned step towards Chigi with arms reaching out for Chigi.

'I SAID LEAVE!’ Chigi shouted as her eyes met with Seshiru’s.

However, when she saw what was inside Seshiru’s eyes, something clicked inside her and straightaway, Chigi began to regret her words. She realised that Seshiru’s eyes were becoming beady with quickly forming tears.

Chigi saw the genuine worry in them as well as the hurt Chigi had just inflicted on Seshiru. With this observation noted, Chigi began to take a more welcoming stance and composed herself as much as possible.

She knew Seshiru meant well but there was no way Chigi could deal Seshiru right now. She didn’t have the mental or the physical energy to because she needed it to think for herself first.

'Please… leave,’ said Chigi this time more gently and with eyes closed, 'I need a moment to be alone.’ She hoped that if Seshiru were to grant her one request, this would be it.

Her own tears were beginning to form but she did not want to shed them in front of Seshiru as she knew it would only break Seshiru’s heart even more. After all, Chigi knew how Seshiru felt about her too.

Nonetheless, Seshiru continued to remain her ground and Chigi clenched her hands together into a fist, preventing herself from losing her temper once again.

There was a pause between the two as both of them began to calculate their next moves. But suddenly, Seshiru spoke.

'I’ll go,’ said Seshiru firmly but with a tone of tenderness still evident, 'I’ll give you time. But I expect you to talk to me once you’re ready.’

Chigi’s hard gaze met with Seshiru’s and immediately saw that it was full of sincerity. Seshiru’s stare burnt into Chigi’s as they began an intense staring contest.

However, realising she could not win this fight, Chigi gave in and looked away.

'Fine,’ said Chigi just as firmly back, 'I’ll talk to you. When I’m ready.’

Chigi masked a hard expression but what was really hidden behind, were emotions of pain, shame, confusion and helplessness.

Seshiru had seen through this of course and so she understood Chigi’s need to be by herself right now. But Seshiru wanted an explanation, this was the least Chigi could do for her, and Chigi knew that.

Then from the corner of Chigi’s eyes, she saw Seshiru giving her a content nod before turning around to leave the room and shutting the door close behind her.

As soon as she heard the door close, Chigi collapsed weakly against the nearest wall and slumped down onto the floor. She will talk to Seshiru later but right now she needed to sort out the mess that was in her head.

But Chigi didn’t know where to begin.

Chigi let out a shaky sigh as her lips trembled from remaining complicated emotions running through her.

So.

Miyu loved her.

Chigi scrunched her eyes up as she tried to comprehend this newly realised fact.

How did this happen?

WHEN did this happen?  
  


But most importantly, oh how she had dreamt for this moment to come true.

Finally, those long held tears began to fall and Chigi wasn’t sure if they were tears of joy or tears for their unfortunate yet inevitable love.

Chigi leant her head back as she allowed herself to finally liberate the emotions that had accumulated within her these past couple of days through crying.

'I love you too… Miyu’

Chigi whispered breathily up to the sky while the tears streamed down. This way, she hoped that somehow Miyu would be able to hear her.

Then slowly realising what all those past blushes and shy words from Miyu really meant, Chigi wailed even more as she bought her hand up to cover her mouth, trying to muffle the noises. Again, Chigi didn’t know if she was crying because of happiness or despair. Maybe it was both.

But even so, it was still loud enough for Seshiru to hear from downstairs.

Chigi wondered if it hadn’t been for those 3 words and Miyu’s crying combined, how much longer she would have kept herself in the dark and how much longer she would have continued to lie to herself.

Everyone else had been right all along, whereas she had failed to realise.

Mattsu.

Saki.

Hitoko.

Seshiru.

They had all told her over and over again but Chigi just didn’t believe it.  
  


Because Chigi didn’t believe in herself.    
  


'Stupid stupid stupid!’ As she said to herself repeatedly.

3 years.

3 years of being with Miyu and she only realised now?!

How could she have been so blind?!

Chigi banged the back of her head against the wall continuously as the realisation of regret and her foolishness came over her.

Right now, all she wanted to do was to be close to Miyu, embracing her in her arms and whispering strings of 'I love you’ directly into her ears. Chigi wondered how that would feel like, having Miyu’s warmth intertwined with her own while she caressed Miyu’s soft hair like she has no care in the world.

There was no more guilt inside her for thinking like this way anymore, because now she knew how Miyu felt about her.

Thank god for that phone call.

But oh god that phone call…

Chigi’s dread then overcame her as she tried to imagine how Miyu must be feeling right now. Miyu’s crying was a noise she never wanted to hear again. Because recalling the way Miyu’s voice had cracked over the phone, pulled on every single one of Chigi’s heartstrings and she was sure it would be less painful if someone just tore out her heart instead.

Fuck, she had messed up, she had messed up big time.

Having said this, deep down, part of her rejoiced at the fact that Miyu was jealous. Because this time Miyu wasn’t jealous about Chigi dancing with the other musumeyakus, but this time it was about Chigi being with another person.

Then out of nowhere, an urge to let out a laugh entered Chigi as she began to marvel at how unbelievable and ridiculous this situation was.  
  


Miyu loved her!  
  


Never in a million years did Chigi imagine Miyu would feel this way towards her. Never in a million years did she imagine Miyu would reciprocate this love.  
  


And yet still, Chigi wanted, no, she craved for one last confirmation.

She craved for Miyu to say those 3 words with her own mouth. Because if she had that, Chigi would be willing to die where she stood and still profess that she had lived a long and blissful life.

If this was all a dream, she hoped to never wake up from it.

If this was all a dream, she hop-

*Buzz*

Then, interrupting her thoughts, next to her on the floor, Chigi’s phone buzzed as the screen came alive with the alert of a new message.

Scrambling to pick it up, Chigi wondered who this could be now.

She began to read the message.

You don’t know who I am but I know who you are.

You are Sagiri Seina, the Ex Top Star of Takarazuka and I am Miyu’s personal assistant, MoMo. I am writing because there are a few things I want to make clear with you.

First of all, I don’t know what just happened but Miyu is a bloody mess right now. It had to be something that was said or occurred during that phone call because I have never, ever seen Miyu like this before.

Second of all, you better sort this shit out soon because otherwise I’ll be coming for your ass before you can say the word 'sorry’.

I highly urge you to make up your decision on what to do next as quickly as possible and free Miyu, and yourself, from this unnecessary torture.

If you don’t know what I am talking about, I’m sure you’ll be able to work it out.

Hope to meet soon.

M

p.s. If you don’t know how Miyu feels about you even now, you must be one blind person.

\- Unknown number

  
Chigi stared at this message with her mouth slightly gaped open. If Chigi had any more doubts about Miyu’s feelings towards her, this message just got rid of every single one of them.

Then unexpectedly, a faint smile appeared on Chigi’s face because she realised Miyu did have some good people around her. This MoMo seemed to care for Miyu very much and Chigi was more than glad.

Chigi felt more at ease with herself now that she knew Miyu always had someone else looking out for her.

But bringing her focus onto the other part of the text, Chigi’s heart began to sink as she realised how distraught Miyu must be feeling right now. If Chigi and Miyu had swapped places, Chigi could not even begin to envisage how she would have felt…

Only if Chigi was able to reassure Miyu her love for her, to take her home and to make Miyu hers.

But while thinking of these sweet possibilities, Chigi felt the fibres of optimism start to leave her again. Chigi knew the world would not be this kind to her.

Because what if Miyu had already started to despise Chigi?

From the text, it definitely sounded like as if MoMo already harboured feelings of animosity towards her.

What if Miyu refused to ever forgive her?

More importantly, what if Chigi refused to ever forgive herself?

On one hand, Chigi thought maybe she deserved this treatment, this punishment. But on the other, she didn’t want any of those things to be true. Because she wanted Miyu’s love and she wanted all of it.

Having said this, Chigi was beginning to feel more self-conflicted than ever in her life.

Because so what if they had mutual feelings for each other now?

Did it mean they’ll end up together just like that? Any famous love story would tell you the answer to that was a big, fat 'NO’; take Romeo and Juliet for example, or the Titanic. In fact, if all of those lovers tried NOT to be together, maybe they would have all survived instead.

And even if Chigi and Miyu managed to survive their love story, did it mean they will live happily ever after?

Chigi was doubtful.

Would Miyu continue to remain happy if Miyu gave up her potential-filled career just to be with Chigi?

Would Chigi then be happy seeing that Miyu had not realised all her dreams just for her?

Because all of this still did not change the fact that Miyu was now a big celebrity with paparazzi following her every move, and with fans expecting great things from her. Would Miyu ever truly belong to her?

Chigi felt she was regressing back to her old, pessimistic self again and she couldn’t stop it from happening. But she had to admit it, Miyu’s personal assistant was right, she cannot continue to torture themselves like this.

It was indeed time for Chigi to start making some serious decisions.

  
But for this, she needed to ask herself these question first:

  
Was happiness being with Miyu?

Or was happiness letting go of Miyu, once and for all.

  
  
Chigi thinks she already knew the answer.

  
  
In fact, she had always known the answer.


	14. Chapter 14

Miyu:  
  
*Bang Bang Bang*  
  
*Bang Bang Bang*  
  
Miyu’s bedroom door trembled behind her as MoMo pounded against it from the outside. She heard MoMo’s demands and pleas for her to open the door but Miyu took none of it in.

In fact right now, her legs were tucked into her chest as her arms hugged around them with her face buried in her knees. Her chest heaved up and down as she tried to breath in this position while crying at the same time.

Miyu’s mind was full of questions and one of them was ‘why the hell she was feeling like this’. But, the answer was obvious of course, because it was the fact that she had just discovered the woman she loves was sleeping with someone else. With this said, hurt was the most dominant feeling right now.

Because why didn’t Chigi-san tell her? Why did Chigi-san keep this from her? Was Miyu that insignificant to Chigi-San that she didn’t feel the need to tell Miyu? Did Miyu mean so little to Chigi-san?

With these questions on replay in her mind, Miyu could not get out the image of Chigi-san and Seshiru tangled in bed together. It was truly tearing her apart while she struck the sides of her head with balled up fists trying to rid of these images.

Why did Chigi-san choose Seshiru instead of Miyu? After all, she was the top musumeyaku not Seshiru. Were they already a couple before Miyu transferred to Yukigumi? Were they seeing each other during the time she and Chigi-san were Tops? How did Miyu not know any of this? Did the others know too?!

Miyu’s fingers threaded through her hair as she shook her head from side to side trying to purge herself of these thoughts. Her tears flung into the space around her as she tried to forget everything that happened in the past hour. But she couldn’t. It was already deeply engraved in her mind and she didn’t know what to do about it.

Because the source of the problem lay in the fact that for some reason, Miyu never imagined Chigi  _being_ with someone else. In all honesty, Miyu had never thought about Chigi-san having her own private relationship. It just didn’t occur to her.

Wait.

Was she being ignorant? Self-fish? Did she just somehow assume Chigi-san would remain untouchable forever? Is this what Miyu had just expected from Chigi-san?

Slowly, she began to blame herself for being this selfish, to blame herself for not realising sooner that Chigi-san was her own person and that she had the right to do whatever she wanted. But most of all, she blamed herself for not being able to do anything about it.

However, all of this sudden, something struck a chord within her.

Because no, she was wrong.

Because what was wrong with feeling a bit selfish? What was wrong with wanting Chigi-san all to herself? In fact, what does Seshiru have that she couldn’t offer, after all she was the top musumeyaku not her.

Not knowing what had gotten into her, Miyu felt a wave of determination and aggression surge through her as the jealousy that had been poisoning her mind was slowly starting to take effect. Wiping the moisture off her face, Miyu sniffed in her remaining tears and stared into the space in front of her with a determined and purposeful expression. Because Miyu had made up her mind.

She was not going down without a fight.

* * *

Chigi:

Finally getting up from the floor, Chigi sluggishly walked towards the door of her bedroom while her eyes were still swollen from the crying. Right now, she was ready to confront Seshiru and to perhaps apologize for her behaviour earlier. 

She twisted the doorknob in her hands and headed downstairs with a feeling of dread and regret hanging over her.

Her mind was still in a state of disarray but it was slowly getting there. Maybe after this, a goodnight’s sleep would do her some good and she could go over the situation again with a clearer head. Gradually walking down the staircase, she wondered how and what she was going to talk to Seshiru about. Gosh, this was all giving her a big headache.

When she had arrived at her living room entrance, she saw that Seshiru was lying across the sofa with a blanket draped over her body. Chigi carefully treaded forward but the floor creaked causing Seshiru to suddenly turn her head towards Chigi.

They held each other’s gaze for a second in the dimly lit room and both inhaled deeply as they prepared for the conversation ahead. After a few moments, Seshiru began to sit up and Chigi advanced a few steps towards her.

'Erm,’ Chigi began to say, 'it seems like I have finally removed the blindfold that had been covering my eyes for the last few years.’ Feeling embarrassed and ashamed, Chigi looked down and started to fidget with her fingers.

Unexpectedly, she heard a puff of laughter escape from Seshiru’s mouth which made Chigi look up.

'Well thank god for that,’ Seshiru said sarcastically but it was difficult to deduce what Seshiru was really feeling. Chigi continued to look at Seshiru trying to see through her but Seshiru was too good at masking her true self. However, after a few more seconds, Seshiru gave Chigi an understanding smile which really did seem genuine.

'So, what action do you plan to take to finally get your girl?’ Asked Seshiru giving Chigi a raised eyebrow. Hearing this, Chigi looked down and started to play with her fingers again. She wasn’t sure where to begin.

'I-er-I,’ Chigi started, 'I’m not.’ Immediately, the smile dropped from Seshiru’s face. There was pause and Chigi dared not to look up.

'Well as you know, there are things that cannot be changed…and eventually, what I choose to do will affect those around me. S-so I still believe that there won’t be a future for me and Mi-’.

'Are you fucking  _kidding_ me?!’ Seshiru said with a sudden outburst of anger which caught Chigi off guard.

'Now that EVERYTHING had being laid out in front of you, you still decide to choose this route?!’ By now Seshiru had stood up from the sofa and was now furiously pointing her finger at Chigi. Chigi could see that Seshiru was clearly upset and she knew it was a combination of being frustrated at her and the fact that Seshiru was telling the woman she loves to go after someone else. Therefore, Chigi decided it was probably best for her to remain silent.

'Either there is something wrong with your head or that you’re just plain  _stupid_ ,’ seethed Seshiru in a spiteful fashion and she continued to throw her verbal daggers, 'in fact, you know what? Miyu doesn’t deserve you,’ Seshiru scanned Chigi up and down, 'no one does. Being in love with someone like  _you_  is probably the worst luck anyone could wish for!’

And with that, Seshiru took in a deep breath as her face began to fill with shock at the realisation of what she had just said. Chigi was definitely in shock too but she could also see the beads of tears quickly forming in Seshiru’s eyes. At once, Seshiru swung herself around and turned her back towards Chigi.

Fuck, this was not the conversation Chigi had expected.

Chigi knew that Seshiru was crying by the way Seshiru’s shoulders trembled and her hands covering her face. She didn’t attempt to turn her around because she wanted to protect Seshiru’s pride but also because she needed to think for herself for how she was going to respond to what Seshiru had just said. She needed to remain composed right now otherwise the whole house would go crashing down on both of them.

Waiting for the atmosphere to calm down a bit, Chigi carried on. 'I know, and I’m sorry,’ Chigi swallowed the lump in her throat, 'I’m sorry for being such a disappointment to you and I’m sorry if the answer I gave wasn’t the one you wanted to hear.’

Chigi closed her eyes and she continued, 'and you’re right. Anyone who falls in love with me is that person’s misfortune. I-I, and I’m sorry that I don’t have anything else to say.’ Her voice was quiet as she stared down at Seshiru’s heels patiently waiting for her reply.

Then slowly, Seshiru shuffled around and met her watery gaze with Chigi’s. 'I-I didn’t mean that,’ Seshiru said quietly in a regretful tone, 'I think I’m just annoyed at myself for picking up that phone call that’s all…’ Seshiru trailed off as she too, felt embarrassed.

Oh, so that was why Seshiru was acting this way.

'Don’t worry, it’s fine,’ Chigi trying her best to reassure Seshiru with a small smile on her face, 'to be honest I’m glad you picked it up.’ With this, Seshiru looked up at Chigi with a surprised look on her face. 'I’m glad because now I know everything, if it hadn’t been for that phone call I wonder how much longer this would have gone on for.’

Seshiru remained silent but then she decided to say something, 'yet you still choose to do nothing about it.’

'But I am choosing to do something about it,’ replied Chigi, 'I’m deciding to end this once and for all so all of us could finally move on.’ Even though Chigi said this with confidence, anyone could see that her eyes projected a different emotion. But hearing this, Seshiru let out a sigh as she took a step away from Chigi.

'Has it ever occurred to you that this isn’t just your decision to make?’ Seshiru now saying in what sounded like a lecturing tone, 'have you ever thought about what Miyu wanted instead or that she should have an input in making this decision too?’ Chigi understood the meaning behind Seshiru’s words but she did not understand the action behind it. Chigi also didn’t like the fact that they were getting into this conversation again.

'What is the point of being in a relationship when the other doesn’t want to be part of it,’ Chigi retorted. She was beginning to become reluctant and rather annoyed at starting this conversation all over again.

'But that’s not the case between you and Miyu is it?’ Said Seshiru, 'because both of you want to be with each other but it’s just the problem of practicalities in your individual work-life and private-life.’

'Exactly!’ Said Chigi putting both of her hands out in front of her, 'isn’t that a good enough reason already?’

'Well it would be if you’ve tried to resolve the problem first and failed but right now no effort have been made by  _either_  of you to sort this problem out,’ said Seshiru in an exasperated tone, 'all you are doing now is running away from the problem without tackling it first like some bloody coward.’

Hm.

A coward.

Yes.

Maybe that was what she was, maybe that was what she had always been.  
'You’re right. I am a coward,’ Chigi said looking straight into Seshiru’s eyes, 'I don’t want to face this problem because I’m scared about failing without not getting the results I wanted.’

Chigi swallowed despite the fact her mouth was dry, 'I’m scared that if we really did try our best, in the end we would just be left with broken hearts. And you know what I’m scared of the most? I’m scared that Miyu would eventually leave me for some younger guy because she had realised that pursuing her career was more important than being with me.’

Chigi saw her own vision becoming blurred as the tears began to form. But for some reason, Chigi had never felt lighter in her life. Because finally, she was able to expel out the insecurities locked up in her body and confess them to the rest of the world. This felt so wrong but so good at the same time.

And if anyone were to understand this, it would be Seshiru right?

'I’m leaving.’

These two words came out of nowhere and it drew Chigi out of her trance.

'What?!’

'Before you came down I checked the time for next train back which will be in about an hour’s time,’ said Seshiru walking towards the stairs and Chigi couldn’t be more bloody confused, 'so if I want to catch that I need to go now.’

'What?! Right now?’ said Chigi with wide eyes after Seshiru, 'are you not going to comment on what I just said?!’

Hearing this, Seshiru spun around and bored into Chigi’s eyes, 'What is there for me to say?’ Seshiru raised her hands up into the air, 'You’ve said it all. There is nothing else for me to add.’ Chigi stood there gobsmacked at this turn of events, not knowing at all what to say.

'If that is how you feel, then that is how you feel,’ Seshiru’s expression remained blank as if there were no sympathy left within her, 'I think I’ve finally come to the conclusion that no one could help you except for yourself. Therefore I won’t be wasting anymore breath on you. But I just hope that you won’t regret the decision you are thinking of making.’ With that, Seshiru gave one last look at Chigi before heading upstairs to retrieve her belongings.

Chigi was left standing there, staring vacantly at where Seshiru stood.  
After a while, Chigi began to back up from where she stood until her legs hit the edge of the sofa which made her drop down on it with a thud. Her mind was completely blank now as that was not the reaction she had expected from Seshiru.

Somehow those words hit her more than it should and she didn’t know what to think to them. She was not sure how to respond to this bluntness and for the first time in a long time after she had left the revue, she felt an enormous amount of responsibility had being dumped into her hands.

In this daze and not knowing how long it had been, Chigi began to hear footsteps coming down the stairs again and at once, she looked over to where Seshiru had landed; who was now fully dressed, ready and prepared to leave this place.

Chigi froze where she sat as she didn’t trust herself to do anything right now.  
Seshiru turned her attention to Chigi, who sat in the dark room staring back at her.

'I just want to say one last thing before I go,’ this gave Chigi goose-bumps all over her body, 'not until you have carried out you final decision, I will not come to find you and I do  _not_  give you permission to come and look for me either.’ Even though the room is dimly lit, Chigi can see the seriousness and animosity in Seshiru’s eyes.

'I don’t want to involve myself in your situation any longer because I’ve realised it is time for me to move on as well,’ there was a pause and Chigi figured it was because Seshiru needed time to control her emotions too.

'Having said this,’ Seshiru continued, 'maybe someday in the future we could continue on as friends, maybe even good friends.’ Chigi thought she saw Seshiru lips curl up into a weak smile but she wasn’t sure.

'And I look forward to that day Chigi-san,’ Seshiru said in a quieter tone, 'please give me that at least.’

At this, Chigi’s heart shattered as she began to wish the person she was in love with was Seshiru.

'Goodbye Sagiri Seina.’

Unconsciously, tears began to fall from Chigi’s face down to the carpet as she lowered her head, not having the courage to watch Seshiru leave. A few seconds later, she heard her front door open and then close as a deafening silence filled the whole house. And almost instantly, Chigi had never felt so lonely in her life.

Chigi fell to her side and hugged herself into a foetal position on the sofa. All she wanted to do now was to lay there hoping the world would just end right here and now.

The fact that Seshiru had left here calling Chigi a 'coward’ may just be one of the most regretful things Chigi allowed to happen. Whatever conversation she thought she was going to have, this was not the ending she had anticipated.  
Playing the events that have happened just now and in the past few days, Chigi realised that she had let down every possible person who mattered the most to her. People who had expected so much from her have probably now realised just how much of a coward she was.

Gosh, what was wrong with her? How had her life become to be what it was now? Was she able to fix all of this or was she just going to let it be what it is?

Or rather, was she really heading towards a life of loneliness?

'Fuck!’ Immediately, she shot up from the sofa, 'Fuck this! Fuck all of this!’  
She was going to do it, she really was.

Chigi was not going to let this carry on for one more day.

There was no way she would allow herself to accept the fact that Seshiru thinks her to be a coward, no way.

No, she was going to prove Seshiru wrong. In fact, she was going to prove  _herself_  wrong.

So, to begin with, she was going to look for the first flight that will take her to Sakihi Miyu.

* * *

Miyu:

Opening the door with a swing of her arms, Miyu stormed downstairs with the goal to find her personal assistant. Her mind was now ten folds clearer yet her throat and eyes were still raw from all the crying.

She was not a quitter and she had come up with her own plan.

'MoMo! Where are you?’ Ordered Miyu in a stern tone once she arrived at the downstairs landing. Almost at once, her personal assistant popped her head out of the kitchen and looked at Miyu with wide and confused eyes.

’M-Miyu?! Are you feeling better now? Would you like to talk to me?’ MoMo came over to Miyu immediately and held Miyu by her shoulders with both of her hands.

'There is no time now, I need you to find the first flight from here to Nagasaki.’ Miyu pushed past MoMo and began to look for her phone.

'EH?!’ Asked MoMo is an alarmed and surprised tone, 'Why do you want to know that?’

Almost instantly, Miyu stopped what she was doing and turned around to face MoMo.

'Because I’m going to get Chigi-san back.’ 


	15. Chapter 15

**Some day 4 years later….**  
  
Under the starry sky, Chigi pulled the lapels of her coat closer into her as she felt herself becoming chillier in the night air. She looked down at her watch and noted the time was now [23:05](http://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hoshikuzuclub.com%2Fx-apple-data-detectors%3A%2F%2Fembedded-result%2F58&t=OGUwMjliZTU0NzhjNDYzZTk1ZGQ3MThlMmYxYTExNzZiYmZlODUyYixlWXZvMURmZA%3D%3D&b=t%3A1sVY8gJoWYVT4BOLlDYmaQ&p=https%3A%2F%2Ftakarazuka-rpf.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F159691025294%2Fiteiway-15&m=1) which means that the person she was waiting for was now 5 minutes late.

  
She had been sitting here for over 10 minutes now on this park bench wondering why she had agreed to come in the first place. Chigi looked up at the moon above hoping it would give her an answer but instead it just glared down at her. She rubbed her hands together and breathed into them as she tried to warm herself.

  
The moon’s reflection was seen in the river in front her as well as the many cruise ships currently floating upon it. It was truly a beautiful sight to behold and Chigi savoured this moment of peacefulness to herself.

  
But remembering why she was here, she closed her eyes and began to ease her mind and calm her nerves as she prepared herself to see that person again. Their last goodbye had ended on bad terms and Chigi hoped that this time they were able to undo that regretful mistake.

  
Maybe that was why she had agreed to come, to give their friendship or whatever it was a second chance. Or it could be because of the fact that Chigi had missed her, probably (most definitely) more than she was willing to admit to.

  
As she recalled the past memories, she breathed in deeply to replenish the oxygen to her body because whenever she thought about that person, she often finds that she had forgotten to breath.

  
However, amongst the air that she had just breathed in, she picked up on something familiar scent to her.

  
And that was when Chigi knew that  _she_  was here.

  
At once, her eyes shot open as she sensed the person she had been waiting for standing next to her.

  
‘So, you finally arrived huh?’ Said Chigi not looking at the person but with a small smile present on her lips, 'I assume you had a busy schedule today?’  
'Sorry,’ replied the individual, 'MoMo had a difficult time parking, which is why I’m late.’

  
Chigi gave a small 'Hm’ in reply as there was nothing else she could say to that explanation but part of her did want to ask how MoMo had been doing.

  
'May I sit down please?’ Asked the person in a polite yet wary fashion. Hearing this, Chigi looked into the eyes of the person speaking and with a gesture of her hand, she said, 'yeah sure, this is the public’s property after all.’

  
And then for what seemed like a long time, they held each other’s gaze as it had been an eternity since Chigi had looked into the eyes of the famous Sakihi Miyu.

  
Then slowly yet gracefully, Miyu sat beside Chigi on the cold, hard bench. For a while, they did not talk, instead they both took the time to adjust to each other’s presence and prepared themselves for the conversation to come.

  
'Erm,’ Miyu began, 'so how has Chigi-san been?’ From the corner of her eyes, Chigi could see that Miyu was fidgeting with her fingers on her lap and she could tell by the action that Miyu was nervous and tense.

  
'I’ve been well,’ said Chigi inhaling in the night’s air, trying to relax her shoulders, 'you?’ Even though, Chigi asked the question back, she wasn’t sure if she was really interested in an answer or not.

  
'I’m well too,’ came Miyu’s reply in a small voice with her head still looking down into her lap, 'thanks for asking.’

  
Again, Chigi replied with a small 'Hm’ as anything else would have felt forced or insincere. Silence then filled the air as Chigi continued to observe the scenery in front of them and with Miyu’s eyes still trained at her clasped hands in her own lap.

  
'So,’ Miyu began to say again breaking the silence, 'how has work been for you Chigi-san?’ Chigi wasn’t sure what Miyu wanted to get out of this small-talk, but if it will help her to get to her main point, then so be it.

  
'Work’s good too I guess,’ Chigi answered with a sigh, 'the theater company is doing pretty well, Mattsu and I are actually preparing a show for the Apollo soon.’

  
'Wow that’s amazing,’ this time Miyu had turned her head fully around to look at Chigi and Chigi couldn’t help but to look back at her too.

  
But what caught Chigi off guard was the bright, genuine smile that had appeared on Miyu’s face. For a moment there, her mind went blank as she marveled at how beautiful Miyu still is.

  
  
Shit.

  
  
Immediately, Chigi peeled her eyes away from the women next to her and turned her attention back to the lights on the river.

  
'Yeah, you think?’ Chigi said clearing her throat but her voice came out more high pitched than she had liked, 'for the past 3 years we’ve been working our butts off so I guess that it makes sense that we are finally seeing the fruits of our labour.’

  
'Well that’s good to hear,’ said Miyu quietly still looking at Chigi’s profile. Chigi felt Miyu’s eyes on her and it was beginning to make her feel uncomfortable. She shifted in her seat and was just about to speak when Miyu asked, 'erm, so how is it going with you and erm, you and-’

  
'Me and Victoria?’

  
Were they actually going to get into this part of conversation?

  
You can’t be bloody serious.

  
'Yeah your girfrien-’

  
'Fiancé’

  
'Sorry, your fiancé.’

  
  
  
…  
  
  
  
  
By now, Miyu had looked back into her own lap and the atmosphere had gone from tense to awkward. The ring on Chigi’s finger burnt as she had never being so aware of it in her life.

  
'Do you really want to know or are you just asking out of curtesy?’ Chigi had no idea why she was being so blunt but it could be because she didn’t want any of them to pretend anymore.

  
Then from beside her, Miyu let out a weak chuckle and at the same time shaking her head, she said, 'To be honest, I don’t actually know myself.’ The laugh was a way to ease out the atmosphere and maybe to some extent, it had actually worked.

  
They allowed the silence between them to linger for a bit longer so that they could both breath again. This was because since a very long time ago, every time they spoke, both of them would be left breathless as well as emotionally exhausted. Chigi didn’t know why but this was just the way it was.

  
The side of Chigi that faced Miyu felt like it was on fire and the desire to touch her was so strong that Chigi wanted to cut her own arm off, preventing herself from doing so. She had expected some old feelings to reemerge but not to this extent. Maybe it was a bad decision to come, in fact, this was becoming rather dangerous.

  
’S-so,’ Chigi stuttered out, 'how is it going with  _your_ work?’ If they were going to make small-talk, Chigi thought she would contribute as well.

  
Before replying, she noted that Miyu began to play with her fingers again and Chigi saw Miyu’s shoulders rise and drop as she inhaled deeply.

  
'Actually this is why I called you here…’ Miyu trailed off and this had caught Chigi’s attention.

  
So this was why Miyu called her here?

  
What was it?

  
'What is it?’ Chigi said slightly turned towards Miyu.

  
'You see, I’ve made a decision,’ Miyu spoke and Chigi noticed that Miyu swallowed before continuing. For some reason right now, her own heart drummed in her chest as she anticipated for what Miyu was about to say.

  
What decision could Miyu have made that she so desperately wanted to talk to Chigi about. At least, it had seemed like that in the text Miyu sent her a few days ago.  
  
  
  
'I’ve made the decision to quit the entertainment industry.’

  
  
  
And all of the sudden, a high pitched ring filled Chigi’s ears as her vision became more blurred.  
  
  
  
Eh?

  
What did she just say?

  
  
  
'I know you probably don’t care about any of this but I-’ Miyu continued on but by now Chigi had stopped listening. Instead she was trying to comprehend what Miyu had just said.

  
Did she just hear that correctly? Did Miyu just say that she was quitting the entertainment industry?

  
  
What?!

  
  
’-but the main reason is that I miss you and I’d like you to give us a chan-’

  
'Stop-’ Chigi found herself saying but her mind was still in a state of confusion and shock.

  
’-I know that you are getting marrie-’

  
'Please just stop for a secon-’

  
’-I love yo-’

  
  
  
'I SAID SHUT UP!’

  
  
  
Immediately there was a pause and Chigi found herself looking into the face of a very stunned Miyu.

  
  
  
'What the  _fuck_  did you just say?!’


	16. 16

Miyu:

‘You did what?!’

'I-It was just that you seemed so distraught,’ MoMo explained waving her hands frenziedly in front of her, 'that was why I texted Chigi because I thought maybe she would tell me what had happened!’ Miyu continued to stare at her personal assistant with wide eyes.

'W-well? And?! Did she reply?!’ Miyu could not believe her personal assistant just used her phone again without her permission.

'No, actually she hasn’t,’ MoMo replied with head dropping to look down at the floor, 'maybe she didn’t notice anything was wron-’

Hearing this, Miyu let out an exasperated sigh and pinched the region between her eyes, 'well now she does doesn’t she?!’ She gave MoMo her most frustrated expression trying to convey her feelings of distress to her. There was a small pause as Miyu began to pace back and forth around the room while her personal assistant’s eyes followed her path.

'Look,’ MoMo finally said, 'I would say 'I’m sorry’ but I’m not ok,’ her voice was firmer this time, 'she needs to know how you were affecte-.’

Suddenly, MoMo stopped mid-sentence and narrowed her eyes at Miyu, 'Actually, this brings me back to ask the question again. What happened anyway?’ MoMo’s eyes were trained on Miyu and Miyu felt like there was no way she could escape now.

’T-That doesn’t matter anymore,’ Miyu became flustered at once as she recalled her awful behaviour earlier, 'what matters is that I want to be by Chigi-san’s side.’ Then, holding her chin up high and gulping down the lump in her throat, she said, 'right now.’

After saying this, MoMo stared back at her as if she was crazy and then shaking her head, she said, 'But what did you mean when you said 'I’m going to go Chigi-san back’?’

Miyu tried to avert her eyes away from MoMo’s gaze but MoMo followed her line of vision, 'has Chigi-san being taken away or something? Seriously, what the fuck Miyu, what the hell is going on?’

'I said it doesn’t matter ok!’ said Miyu getting more and more frustrated, 'I just need to go and find her  _right now_.’

Miyu’s cheeks were becoming flushed as she tried her best to avoid telling the shameful truth. After all, how could she begin to admit to how jealous she felt knowing that a woman (whom MoMo didn’t even know) was sleeping with Chigi-san and how she wished she could snap her in half?

'Then fine! Don’t tell me!’ This time it was MoMo who had started to pace and Miyu who watched her helplessly wishing she could do something.

However, after a few moments, MoMo stopped and turned around to face Miyu, 'are you sure you want to do this though?’ Miyu could tell MoMo wanted to try and talk some sense into her but she wanted none of it.

'Because I don’t know man, Miyu-chan, I feel like Chigi-san should be the one t-’  
'Yes. I want to do this,’ Miyu interrupted MoMo, 'because I agree with what you said before.’ Miyu paused to swallow her dry mouth and MoMo eagerly waited for her to finish.

'Like you said, I also don’t want to be the old, timid Miyu anymore. I want to be a Miyu who is more confident and more adamant about what she wants.’ Miyu clutched at the material of her skirt on the sides of her body like a small child itching to prove something.

Nonetheless, deep down, while she was determined to carry out her plan, feelings of apprehension and panic flowed through her body. Of course, she knew why though. Because this was something she had never done before and she was anxious about how she was going to handle it or if the consequences would turn out how she hoped.

But still, somehow, all of this felt right and electrifying to her.

'Ok…,’ said MoMo still sounding unsure drawing Miyu’s attention back to her, 'but like, are you 100%, no, 110%  _sure_  you want to do this? Like absolutely positive and that you’re not going to regret it?’ MoMo’s eye burned into her as Miyu felt MoMo’s anxiety and desperation for her to rethink twice about her actions.

'You do know there are paparazzi out there all over the place looking for you right? The stuff between you and Haruto-kun still isn’t over yet remember?’ Miyu had to admit it, she had completely forgotten about Haruto-kun.

'I-I,’ said Miyu trying to come up with a reply to what MoMo had just said, 'I don’t care,’ but in actual fact she did, just a bit.

'I-I could just wear a disguise of something,’ Miyu was really holding onto the last threads of hope here. In response to this, MoMo just looked at her sideways with her head slightly retracted trying to assess the sanity of Miyu at this point.

'Look. If you don’t want to go, I get it,’ Miyu finally resolved, 'but I will still go myself.’ With this said, Miyu turned back to what she was doing and began to look for the documents she needed to fly.

There was a pause behind her but Miyu was dying to hear a response from her personal assistant. Because right now more than ever, Miyu desperately needed the support from another individual.

'Oh for fuck’s sake,’ Miyu heard MoMo finally whisper in the background, 'Fine! You win! I will come with you.’ Hearing this, Miyu did a little celebratory dance inside. She knew she could always count on MoMo!

'Gosh the things I have to do…’ MoMo said this under her breath not at all being discrete.

Despite the fact Miyu faced away from MoMo, she knew MoMo was probably also rolling her eyes with her hands thrown up in the air. With this image in mind, Miyu’s lips curved into a small smile.

MoMo really was the best personal assistant anyone could ever wish for.

'Ok,’ Miyu heard MoMo say after a few seconds, 'the next available flight to Nagasaki is in 4 hours’ time.’ Miyu turned around to face MoMo and saw that her personal was busy looking at the information on her phone.

4 hours.

That’s good, they still had plenty of time to prepare.

'Ok,’ said Miyu with an intake of breath, 'let’s get ready then.’

* * *

Chigi:

After finding out the next flight which leaves for Tokyo is in an hour’s time, Chigi immediately hopped into her car just grabbing the essentials: her purse, passport and keys. Her body didn’t feel like her own anymore as the only thing on her mind now was getting on that flight.

However, now that she was in her car, she began to wonder if what she was doing was completely idiotic and that she should just turn around and sleep all of this off.

Therefore, with all these insecurities and conflicting feelings inside her, she clenched her steering wheel tightly and banged her forehead on the back of her hands as she waited for the red traffic light to turn green.

It’s still not too late to turn back.

It’s still not too late to turn back.

It’s still not too late to turn back.

Chigi chanted this phrase over and over again in her head as she dealt with the civil war currently occurring inside her. But not only that, she was also trying to figure out how she was going to talk to Miyu once she was in front of her.

For the past 30 minutes or so, she had been trying to come with a dialogue in her mind of what she would say to Miyu.

'Erm,’ Chigi began whispering to herself again, 'you may not know this but you see… I’m completely in love with yo- Fuck!’ She groaned to herself as every sentence she was coming up with cringed herself to the core.

She decided to try once more.

'Miyu. There is something I need to tell you. I think that we should be together- Fuck!’ This was not going work. Maybe Chigi will just have to wing it when the time com-

*BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP*

Feeling like as if a bucket of ice-cold water had been dumped on her, Chigi jumped in the driver’s seat as the car behind her began to honk loudly at her.

Immediately, her head spun around to assess the situation when she realised the light had turned to green and that she was currently holding up the traffic.  
'Shit shit shit,’ Chigi muttered frantically to herself, 'SORRY!’

She hoped the drivers behind had manged to hear her while her foot quickly pressed down on the accelerator resulting in the car to jolt forward. The level of stress in her body was off the charts right now as she wondered why the fuck were there so many cars already on the road at this time of the day.

Eyes back on the road and with the line of angry drivers behind her forgotten, her mind began to wonder back to Miyu again.

But that was when she realised something.

Shit.

She didn’t even know where Miyu was living in Tokyo.

'Ah for fuck’s sake…,’ she swore to herself and kicked herself mentally.

Ah well, she’ll just have to figure it out once she arrives in Tokyo. Now all she wanted to do was to get on that bloody flight.

* * *

Finally arriving at the airport after what seemed like the most stressful drive of her life, Chigi found a space to park her car. Then, in a completely rushed fashion, she bought a parking ticket for a week. She wasn’t sure how long she needed but a week should be enough. Right?

Anyway not thinking too much of it, she hurried (more like ran) towards the nearest elevator and headed towards the terminal for domestic flights.  
As she was running, she looked down at her watch.

'Shit,’ Chigi cursed internally, '14 more minutes!’ With this in mind she ran like she has never before and at last, she arrived in front of the elevator. Chigi stepped forward to press the button repeatedly as she began to pace up and down on the spot.

'Come on come on come on!’

*PING*

It was here and almost at once, Chigi trod into the lift and pressed down on the button that would get her to the level she needed.

Even though she was the only person in the elevator right now, she felt claustrophobic and a thin film of sweat now covered her forehead. She still couldn’t believe that she was actually doing this.

Chigi felt like she was in some cheesy RomCom where she was going after her lover. She groaned loudly to herself as she banged the back of her head on the metal wall of the elevator.

Seriously though, what was she doing?

*PING*

The sound of the elevator arriving at the correct level knocked Chigi out of her thoughts. Chigi squeezed herself out of opening door with her patience growing thinner by the second. At once her eyes began to scan the setting before her for an information desk or a place where she could purchase tickets.

Then, recognising the words 'TICKET OFFICE’ on the sign to the right and above her, her legs began to move automatically as she sprinted towards the desk.

As she was running towards it, the staff sitting by the desk had noticed her running towards them while they stared at Chigi with wide eyes. However, Chigi did not care about how she looked right now because all she wanted to do was to purchase a ticket and get on that plane.

'Hi!’ Chigi said breathlessly to the two stunned ladies working at the ticket office, 'could you get me on the next flight to Tokyo please,’ she looked down at her watch, 'which should be the one in 10 mins.’ Her eyes held the gaze of the person behind the desk desperately as Chigi’s fate now rested on the speed of the person in front of her.

'Y-yes sure! Let me just chec-’

'Please! Hurry! I have to get on that flight!’ Chigi held the edge of the desk tightly as her knuckles began to whiten with the pressure. The lady in front of her started to type furiously on the computer as Chigi and her colleague watched her with intense and expecting expressions.

'Erm,’ the woman began to say shakily, 'f-fortunately t-there is one more ticket lef-’

'Excellent!’ Chigi slapped down on the desk making the two individuals behind it to jump.

'Bu-but it’s f-first clas-’

'It’s fine! Just give me whatever,’ then in a hurried fashion, Chigi dumped everything she had in her hand bag which included her purse, passport and keys. The female staff member helped Chigi to fumble through her belongings to retrieve the correct documents.  

After what seemed to be only 2 mins, the woman printed out the boarding pass for Chigi who paid the ¥138000 (holy shit!) using the credit card in her wallet.  
'There you go, here is your boarding pas-’

Before the woman could finish, Chigi spoke a hasty 'Thank you!’ and snatched the ticket off the woman’s hands and at once, ran towards Security.

(But little did she know, the women who just served her were (still are) in fact big fans of Sagiri Seina the ex-Top Star of Takarazuka.)

Chigi, whose head was focusing on a single goal at the moment, flew through Security due to the lack of people at this time of the day and sprinted to find the boarding gate displayed on her ticket. The muscles in her legs felt like they were on fire but her mind refused to give up right now. Her head twisted left and right as she ran through the boarding gates finding the one going to Tokyo.

Then, in the distance, she saw a small group of people having their boarding passes checked at one of the gates. As she got closer, she took in the gate number and looked at the one on her ticket. Seeing that they were the same, Chigi gave her last outburst of energy and sprinted towards it while she felt the wind in her hair.

'EXCUSE ME!’ Chigi shouted as she saw the staff about to block off the boarding gate, 'I’m on this flight too!’

Coming to an abrupt stop in front the alarmed air hostess, she handed her boarding ticket to her with a head throbbing due to physical fatigue and adrenaline.

'Thank you Miss,’ said the woman giving Chigi one of their fake smiles, 'this way please.’ After ripping the end of Chigi’s ticket, she gestured Chigi towards the corridor leading to the plane while handing the ticket back to her.

Chigi looked back and forth between the ticket and the woman now slightly confused as to what she should do.

'W-wait so you’re saying that’s it? I-I can go past now,’ said Chigi in a shaky voice, she couldn’t believe it.

'Yes, of course,’ said the air hostess giving her a mildly concerned look and gesturing her hand to the space in front of Chigi, 'just this way please.’

Chigi looked between the ticket in her hand and the confused woman once more before unconsciously shuffling her legs forward.

And as Chigi began to walk towards the long corridor with a dumbfounded expression, one phrase played in her mind.

Shit.

I made it. 


	17. 17

Miyu:

‘Right! Here we are!’

Hearing this, Miyu’s hands immediately went to the car door handle, ready to exit the car.

‘Alright thank you Miyazaki-san!’ Miyu heard MoMo say to their driver, 'you don’t know how much this help means to me and Miy- EH?! Miyu-chan! Wait for me!’ But Miyu did not wait because they were late.

Very late.

'Excuse sir, but we need to get going now-’ Before Miyu could finish hearing MoMo’s gratitude of thanks towards their hired driver, Miyu had already stepped out of the car and began to scan her surroundings. Around her, there were many people. People with their families and numerous luggage whereas she only had a handbag on her.

‘Oi! Miyu wait for me!’ said MoMo running up breathlessly next to Miyu’s side.

'MoMo what terminal did you say our flight was?’ Completely ignoring what MoMo had just said, Miyu’s eyes were trained on the terminal gates in front of her. She needed to know which one she was about to charge towards.

'This one right here,’ MoMo pointed towards the opening before them and therefore without a word, Miyu’s legs started to take action.

'Hey wait up!’ Shouted MoMo who ran after her again. However right now, Miyu cared very little for the activities around her. Because her only focus was boarding that flight. The flight which they are already (very) late for.

The story behind their lateness began when MoMo’s car decided to break down in the middle of their journey to the airport. This resulted in the pair ringing up their usually chauffeur. But because there was more traffic than usual this morning, the chauffeur was late in getting to them and therefore late in getting them to the airport. And according to the time now, the flight should have already taken off. But still, Miyu had hope.

With this said Miyu’s legs worked hard underneath her as she desperately searched for the nearest information desk to seek information regarding her flight.

Then immediately spotting one to the left of her, Miyu headed towards it as fast as her legs could carry her.

'Excuse me, has the flight to Nagasaki already taken off?’ Miyu stopped dead in front of the information desk with eyes trained intently on the staff member behind it.

'Yes Miss, let me check that for you,’ the man fingers started to type on his keyboard while Miyu’s eyes followed his gaze as he scanned across his computer screen, 'unfortunately… yes it ha-’

'When?! Not too long ago I presume?!’ Miyu felt a punch landing on her stomach but deep down she kind of knew the plane had taken off already.

'Just 10 mins ago actually,’ said the man in an apologetic manner. After hearing this, Miyu’s hands dropped from the desk as her gaze fell to the floor and her heart dropping to the pits of her stomach.

Then in a quiet tone next to her, MoMo began to say, 'maybe it’s fate Miyu. Let’s just go hom-’

'How about the next flight? Are there still tickets left for that,’ Miyu interrupted MoMo before she could finish. She was not ready to give up just yet.

'Erm,’ with this, the staff member’s eyes went back to his screen as he began to search for the results of the next flights. There was a pause and this moment could not have been more suspenseful for Miyu.

'Oh!’ The man abruptly said, 'in fact, there is! In 2 hours’ time! Would you like to have two tickets for that?’

'Yes please!’ Miyu felt a wave of relieve wash over her even though the disappointment of having to wait 2 more hours to see Chigi-san still lingered. 'Thank you so much!’ And at once, she began to sort out the payment and documents with the staff member.

However beside her, MoMo began to eject phrases of frustration such as 'Jesus Christ’ and 'I can’t believe it’ but Miyu ignored all of it. She knew the way she was acting now may have been selfish, but she had never been so adamant about doing one thing so much in her life before. Sakihi Miyu was going to get her Chigi-san back.

'Miyu are we  _actually_ going to wait here for the next one?!’ MoMo came face-to-face with Miyu as she stared at her with bewildered eyes and an expression of total disbelieve.

'Yes. We are,’ said Miyu stuffing their tickets into her handbag. And then looking straight into the eyes of MoMo she said, 'come on. Let’s go and find a place to sit down.’

And with that, she began to walk away leaving a stunned MoMo behind.

After walking a few steps away, a reply was heard from MoMo, 'where in the world can we go without being swarmed by a crowd of crazed fans huh?! Huh?! Oi! Miyu are you listening to me?!’

_Flight BA007 to London is now boarding._

There were many noises coming from every corner of the airport right now, including MoMo’s anxiety-filled comments who had managed to catch up with Miyu again.

Nevertheless, Miyu did not let her concentration falter. She was going to do this and she will make sure that she succeeds.

* * *

Chigi:

Throughout the majority of the flight, Chigi had her eyes closed as she desperately tried to comprehend her current actions.

Her mind was still in a chaotic and confused state as to why she was doing this. Was she doing this out of love? Was she doing this to prove something?  _What_  was she trying to prove?  _Who_  was she trying to prove to?

Finally, after about an hour of self-confliction, Chigi came to a defeated conclusion that she was here now, on the plane, about to land in Tokyo, and about to look for Miyu. She didn’t want to give up because otherwise it would prove everybody correct - that she was a coward. And she definitely did not want that.

Therefore, as soon as the plane landed, Chigi hopped off the aircraft and followed the rest of the passengers towards the exit into the main body of the airport.

Despite the previous adrenaline rush in her body muddling up her thoughts, after a couple of hours on the plane thinking for herself, she was more absorbed and clear minded as to what was she needed to do now.

And the 1st objective for completing her mission was to find out where Miyu lived. Thankfully, she knew exactly how to do that.

Remembering her previous text message from MoMo, Miyu’s personal assistant, Chigi knew there was no one better to ask than her. Therefore finding MoMo’s number on her phone, Chigi began to compose a polite yet firm message.

_Hi MoMo,_

_As you may know this is Sagiri Seina, or better known to Miyu as Chigi-San. I am writing because I want to tell you that I have landed in Tokyo and wish to talk to Miyu. The details of what I want to talk about is not important right now because first of all I need to know where Miyu lives. Therefore if you would be so kind to send me the address to Miyu’s acco-_

All of the sudden, in the middle of Chigi’s texting with her head down, she collided with a large, bulky man who also appeared to be in a rush.

Nonetheless, due to the collision, the phone dropped from Chigi’s hand. With the combination of gravity and its own weight, the phone plummeted onto the marbled floor causing its back cover to break off and its front screen smashed.

'Oh. My. God.’ Said the man bringing his hands up to cover his mouth. 'I. Am. So. Sorry.’ The man clearly looked apologetic as his eyes widened with shock and filled with dread.

Chigi, who just stared at her impaired phone on the ground with a gaped expression, heard the man’s apology but was unable to form words as she too was baffled.

'I-I’m in a rush right now,’ the man stuttered out, 'b-but here’s my business card,’ the man unsteadily took out a card from his pocket and handed it towards Chigi with both hands who nonchalantly took it from him.

'Contact the number on here and I will pay for the damage. I-I promise!’ With this said, the man stumbled backwards and then finally turned around to catch his flight.

As Chigi took in what just had happened, she slowly bent down and picked up her broken phone.

'Fuck my life,’ Chigi whispered under her breath as she scrunched her eyes up in frustration. Chigi took a moment to breathe as she tried her best not to break down.

'It’s fine, it’s fine,’ she said between deep breathes, 'all I have to do now, is to find a store where they can fix this.’ Then inhaling one last breath and plastering a fake smile onto her face, she began to embark on another unexpected journey: finding a place to fix this bloody unfortunate incident.

_Flight BA007 to London is now boarding._

* * *

Miyu:

As Miyu and MoMo continued to walk through the length of the airport attempting to find a place where they can settle, members of the public had begun to recognise them. Some had been discretely pointing at them and whispering behind covered mouths to their companions.

'I thought you were going to wear a disguise!’ Hissed MoMo in a very hushed tone to Miyu.

'I forgot ok!’ Miyu retorted back. However, she too was annoyed at herself for not even wearing the smallest amount of disguise. It must have been the fact that the excitement and trepidation of seeing Chigi-san again made her to forget things that did not seem as important.

'How can you just forget? Do you know how easy it is for someone to call the paparazzi on you-’

'Well if you keep on talking to me in this way, people around will definitely realise something!’ Miyu knew she was right because the way they were acting now was definitely not discrete.

'There!’ Miyu suddenly pointed out, 'we could go in there and find a corner to sit down.’

'I guess the chances of being spotted in there is just as likely as anyway els-’ MoMo began to whisper under her breath again but was cut off by Miyu, 'less talking more action ok?’ In response to this, MoMo gave Miyu an unamused 'puff’.

'Come on’ said Miyu ignoring MoMo’s remark as she led MoMo towards McDonald’s.

* * *

Chigi:

After wondering around the airport like a lost child, Chigi still wasn’t able to find a software store or somewhere where she could get her mobile fixed.

She held the cracked phone in her right hand as the left hand went up to scratch at her head in frustration.

Finally, deciding she should probably just seek some help, Chigi went into the nearest store and looked for anyone who could point her to the right direction.

'Erm,’ Chigi said to the shop owner of some jewellery shop she just entered, 'I was wondering if there are any gadget stores about so I could perhaps fix my phone.’ As she said this, Chigi held up her right hand and presented the damaged phone to the person in front of her.

The store manager gave her a sympathetic look and said, 'yes of course,’ and a glimmer of hope flashed before Chigi’s eyes, 'it’s right next to that McDonald’s over there.’

The person then held up her hand and pointed towards a direction over Chigi’s shoulders. Chigi’s eyes followed the course of the store manager’s arm and saw the unmistakable yellow ’M’ in the distance.

Immediately she spun her head around and said, 'thank you so much!’ She then gave the person her most grateful smile and waved her goodbye as she exited the store.

At last, she was a step closer to be back on track to achieve her goal.

* * *

Miyu:

When Miyu and MoMo entered McDonald’s, they noticed that thankfully there weren’t many people about. Near the entrance, sat a young couple who seemed to recognise Miyu upon their presence.

However, as soon as Miyu and the girl in the couple made eye contact, the girl immediately turned her attention back to her boyfriend as if to carry on with their previous conversation. Miyu, too, looked away as if it was no big deal. Maybe she just didn’t recognise Miyu?

'Where should we sit?’ Said MoMo interrupting Miyu’s thoughts in a quiet tone. MoMo’s gaze was everywhere looking suspiciously side to side as if avoiding something.

'How about there?’ Replied Miyu pointing to the table in the far corner of the restaurant. There was no one sitting around the area so maybe it would be safe from prying eyes.

'Right,’ MoMo nodded, 'let’s go.’ And then without another word, MoMo led Miyu by the arms and started to walk towards their destination with heads down.

The pair walked their way around the tables in the restaurant until they reached the table in the corner. Just as they were about to sit down on their respective seats, MoMo suddenly said, 'wait wait wait!’ causing Miyu to pause in mid-air.

'You sit there’, MoMo pointed towards the seat facing away from the window and the rest of the restaurant, 'that way no one will see your face.’ Miyu spent a second to think about MoMo’s reasoning and then completely agreeing with her, she manoeuvred herself around the table to sit opposite MoMo.

As soon as they sat down, MoMo dropped her head into her folded arms and let out a groan. 'I can’t believe we’re actually doing this Miyu. I did not sign up to this when I applied for this job.’

Miyu looked down at the helpless MoMo with a sympathetic look and honesty, she couldn’t be more grateful to have MoMo as her personal assistant. Then with a hand reaching out to rest on MoMo’s shoulder, she said, 'but I’m glad that you applied for this job. Because without you here, I don’t know if I could do this by myself.’ Yet, this did not seem to comfort MoMo because MoMo proceeded to expel out an even more dramatic sigh.

'You know, if I had known of the drama I was getting myself into, maybe I wouldn’t have agre-’

However, before MoMo could finish, someone else spoke up. Seeing MoMo’s head snapped up in alarm, Miyu knew that another person had joined their company.

'Erm,’ a meek voice appeared behind Miyu’s shoulder. Immediately, Miyu snapped around to see who the voice belonged to.

'May I have an autograph please…’ It was the girl from before. So she did recognise Miyu huh?

'Well, we appreciate it if you didn’t actual-’

'No, it’s fine,’ said Miyu stopping MoMo in mid-sentence and turning back to face the girl, 'where would you like me to sign.’ Miyu could never refuse a fan, even under these circumstances. After all, her whole life/career depended on them.

The flustered fan shakily handed over a pen and piece of paper towards Miyu which looked like it was the only scrap of paper she could find.

Seeing this, Miyu gave her a small smile and carefully took the pen and paper from the girl and began to write.

'What’s your name?’ Asked Miyu kindly.

'Erm Kilu would be fine!’

'Erm Miyu…’ Came a sudden voice from MoMo.

'MoMo it’s fine, just give me a secon-’

'No Miyu this is urgen-’

'Please MoMo! She’s just a fan no big dea-’

'I think you should turn around.’

Hearing this, Miyu took her eyes off the paper in her hands and looked at MoMo whose gaze was fixed behind Miyu. The look on MoMo’s face was of pure astonishment and terror.

Then slowly, Miyu turned herself around as she began to dread what was waiting behind her. And immediately, she realised why MoMo had that expression on her face.

Because a huge crowd of people had gathered in front of McDonald’s, pressed up against the window, calling out to Miyu.

'Oh shit.’

Oh shit indeed.

* * *

Chigi:

As she walked closer, the McDonald’s sign got bigger and bigger and her heart pounded in her ribcage due to the intensity. Chigi dashed towards her goal as briskly as she could without attracting too much attention to herself. After all, there was bound to be someone who would recognise her.

After what seemed like a 10Km walk, she finally reached the outside of McDonald’s. However as she went past it, interestingly, a huge crowd had gathered outside its entrance making it impossible for Chigi to see what was going on inside.

For a second, she stopped to tiptoe on her feet as she attempted to peak through the crowd of screaming fans. But then remembering the damaged phone in her hand, she hurriedly turned away and walked past the restaurant. And just as the previous store manager had told her, the software store was the fast-food chain’s next door neighbour.

'Finally,’ Chigi whispered to herself. Taking in the store’s front, she took a step and walked towards a store staff who stood by the entrance.

'Hi,’ said Chigi breathlessly and eagerly, 'I was wondering if you could replace my phone and restore the text information that was previously on there.’ And almost instantly, Chigi shoved the phone into the person’s hands who remained slightly dumbfounded. He then began to inspect broken device.

'Hmm,’ said the staff, 'we can definitely get you a new phone but I’m not sure if we can restor-’

'Please,’ Chigi almost begged, 'retrieving the old information is more important than whatever the new phone I get.’ The desperation in Chigi’s eyes burnt into the staff’s face who continued to inspect the phone with a thoughtful expression.

'Ok…,’ said the man still unsure, 'how about you wait here and I’ll take this and show it to our technician to see what they can make of it.’

'Thank you,’ Chigi said in the grateful tone, 'please try your best.’ After saying this, the man raised his head to give Chigi a polite smile before turning around and walking towards the back of the store.

Chigi’s gaze followed him all the way until he disappeared into what was presumably the store’s office. Her stomach felt twisted as the anticipation of hearing the outcome was becoming too great for her. Because without her chat history, she wouldn’t be able to contact MoMo, which means that she wouldn’t be able to find where Miyu lived which further means that all of this would have been a waste of time.

The string of thoughts did nothing but to worsen the state Chigi was in. Her hand came up to run through her hair which was a gesture of fretfulness while her legs began to pace on the spot.

Then suddenly, next to her, the noise from the crowd outside McDonald’s got louder and louder.

'AHHHHH’

'PLEASE LOOK HERE!!’

'WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!’

Unable to drown out the noise and contain her curiosity, Chigi took a step back from the store she was in in order to speculate at the scene unfolding next door.

After a few seconds of observation, it had seemed like whoever the group of people had been waiting for had come out, and one of them seemed to be shouting, 'HEY! HEY! NO PICTURES PLEASE!’

Chigi couldn’t help but to wonder who they were. They must be pretty famous by the look of it. Did Chigi know them?

Then from the corner of her eyes, she saw the store keeper walking back towards her. Just as she was about to approach him as well, she heard someone cry in pain.

The noise made her freeze.

'GET AWAY FROM HER!’ Screamed the voice again. Apparently one of them had fallen onto the floor due to all the commotion. This fueled the uproar even more.

Then, all of a sudden, Chigi heard a name which made her blood go cold.

'OMG MIYU ARE YOU OK?!’

'LET’S GIVE MIYU SOME SPACE GUYS’

'GET AWAY FROM HER GUYS!!’

Chigi did not hear the store keeper calling out to her.

* * *

Miyu:

Things escalated quickly soon after the crowd appeared. And before Miyu and MoMo could properly react, the group of fans entered the restaurant and was now racing towards them. Immediately, MoMo stood up and grabbed Miyu roughly by the arms ready to get away.

'Shit,’ MoMo swore while pulling Miyu to her feet.

'Where did they all come from,’ said Miyu in a state of panic.

'I don’t know, how should I kn-’

'CAN I TAKE A PICTURE WITH YOU’

'AHH MIYU-CHAN!!’

'I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!’

It was too late, there was no way Miyu can communicate properly with MoMo amongst the noise and people around them. But fortunately, MoMo’s hand was still firmly around Miyu’s arm leading them towards the exit.

During this process, MoMo had taken off her jacket and wrapped it around Miyu’s head trying to protect her from the flashing cameras and any potential injuries caused by the fans.

Nonetheless, the pair felt hands constantly tugging at their clothes and elbows nudging into them. At this moment in time, Miyu wished nothing more than to turn back time and listen to what MoMo said about staying at home.

'Right, here’s what we do,’ MoMo whispered feverishly into Miyu’s ears, 'once we get out, we make a run for it.’ Hearing this, Miyu turned her head towards MoMo to give her an uncertain look. However seeing the determination and certainty in MoMo’s eyes, Miyu nodded and kept her head down again.

'HEY! HEY! NO PICTURES PLEASE!’ MoMo was trying her best to keep the flashing cameras away but of course, no one was listening. It was also becoming increasing difficult to breath and 'claustrophobic’ was the perfect word in describing Miyu’s current state.

By the time they shuffled their way outside McDonald’s entrance, the air cleared up ever so slightly and Miyu could finally see parts of the airport again. However it was still difficult for her to see a way out due to the cameras in front of them and fans waving stuff in their faces.

Suddenly, she felt a strong tug from MoMo.

Miyu twisted her neck around to look at MoMo and the look on her face told Miyu exactly what they needed to do now. They were going to do it, they were going to make a run for it. Right now.

Therefore, giving each the one last nod and mouthing the words '3, 2, 1’ together, their legs sprung to action.

At first, it worked well.

Miyu and MoMo collectively managed to push some fans out of the way creating a path for their escape. But just as they thought they were free, Miyu’s legs caught on something. And just like that, she came crashing down to the floor like a ton of bricks.

A ringing noise filled Miyu’s ears as she felt a dull pain emerging in her elbows and knees.

However, completely ignoring it, she began to push herself up onto her hands. MoMo was screaming in her ears but she couldn’t make out the exact words as the world seemed to spin around her.

Miyu could also hear outcries from the fans in response to her falling over and not too long after, Miyu began to feel as if the crowd may have started to back up a little bit.

Still on the floor though with MoMo trying to pick her up, she slowly raised her face as she anticipated flashing cameras to tower over her, trying to capture each moment of her downfall. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes but she was determined not to lose. She will get up with dignity and with her head held high.

Therefore, with a surge of determination flowing through her, Miyu swallowed the lump in her throat as she began to push herself up onto her feet. Yes, she was going to be brave about this and she WILL face up to this challenge.

Most importantly, she was going to show the world what she was made of.

However, that all changed when she saw through a gap amongst the heads of the fans as she raised her body.

And through the gap, she saw someone.

Someone who sent shivers down her spine.

And immediately, the world stopped for Miyu as the first of many tears began to roll down her cheeks.


	18. Chapter 18

Chigi:

Chigi felt like she was in a dream right now. Sure, coincidences happen but this? This was just beyond ridiculous. The moment her eyes met with Miyu’s, the world around her blurred except for the Miyu in her sight.

Her hands became clammy and her mouth became drier and drier. In fact, she was finding it harder to breathe as she felt her airway passage getting narrower under this intensity.

Despite the state she was in, she still managed to notice one thing. And that was the fact that Miyu had not changed one bit. Her make up,her clothes, everything about her was exactly how Chigi had remembered. This was the Miyu Chigi fell in love with, and she was more certain than ever that this was the Miyu she was still in love with.

Unconsciously, her feet began to shuffle forward as if Miyu’s body was calling out to her own. Their eyes were locked with one another as if they were afraid that if they were to look away, the other would vanish.

Neither of Chigi’s body or soul felt it belonged to her right now. Her body was reacting completely on its own while her soul seemed to have flown off to god knows where.

This was not happening.

But as fate would have it, this was indeed happening.  

* * *

Miyu:

Miyu’s mind was in complete disarray. Seeing Chigi-san seemed to have triggered a state of paralyses within her. Her whole body froze in place but in fact, inside of her, she trembled with shock and disbelieve. The tears flowed out of her eyes like rivers as her mouth slowly fell open.

_Could it be her? Was it really her am seeing?_ Miyu didn’t know what to think other than the questions flooding her mind right now.  _Why was Chigi-san here? Wasn’t she supposed to be in Nagasaki? Wasn’t I supposed to go and find her there?_

Suddenly, she felt someone violently shake her body.

‘MIYU!’ Screamed MoMo next to her, 'Miyu! Are you alright?!’ Miyu acknowledged MoMo’s voice but instead her eyes remained on the figure in the distance, between the gaps of the crowd in front of her.

'OI! MIYU! MoMo shook her again, 'what are you looking at?! Come on we have to g-’

'EVERYONE STEP AWAY PLEASE!’

'PLEASE MOVE OVER TO THE SIDE!’

It was the police.

Miyu knew this from the way the commotion immediately quietening around them and the crowd dissipating, making her view of Chigi-san clearer.

Nevertheless, instead of turning around and greeting the police officers, her body remained still and eyes fixed on the woman she loves.

'Oh thank god!’ MoMo said in a relieved tone next to Miyu, 'officers we are  _reaally_  sorry for this. We didn’t know that there would be so many fa-’

'It’s ok,’ Miyu heard one of the officers say, 'it’s not every-day we get celebrities here so I guess it’s a change of scenery for us as well haha.’ She then heard the officer let out a shy laugh.

The officer was probably a fan of hers but Miyu didn’t care for that at the moment. Because right now, all she wanted to do was to go over to the person in the distance and ask her why she was here. And maybe at the same time, confess her feelings too.

'But still, we are really sorry for causing this disturbance,’ MoMo apologized profusely, 'we will leave here immediately and find another place to wait.’

_Leave here immediately?_ Miyu didn’t want to leave, she still needed to confirm that the person standing there was really Chigi-san. They can’t leave yet!

'If you want to, we could escort you guys back to the police station and you can wait there for your flight,’ offered the police officer. Miyu wanted to turn to him and say 'no’, but once again, she kept her eyes secure on Chigi-san because she was afraid Chigi-san will disappear.

‘Oh thank you! That’ll be great,’ said MoMo in a thankful tone, 'did you hear that Miyu? Miyu?!’

Of course, Miyu did hear but she wasn’t about to respond to it anytime soon. Because she wanted all of her attention to be acknowledging the presence of the impossible person who was only meters away.

'Miyu?’ MoMo asked again, 'Miyu, let’s go!’  
MoMo shook her body again.

'Miyu, why are you crying? Miyu what’s wrong?’ MoMo began to sound desperate as she waved a hand in front of her. But again, Miyu remained unresponsive.

That all changed when MoMo tried once more, this time grabbing the sides of Miyu’s face and coming face-to-face with her.

The moment the view to Chigi-san was blocked, Miyu was dragged back to reality as she gasped for air.

Then tearfully, she then managed to choke out something.

’T-t-there…’

Unknowingly, her arm began to elevate as she began to point towards the individual who shouldn’t be there.

With that, MoMo began to twist her body twisted around in the direction of Miyu’s arm while she kept a worried and confused eye on Miyu.

Then her head followed.

Not a second later, she saw exactly what had been causing Miyu’s temporary paralysis.

* * *

MoMo:

_THE FUCK?! WHAT_ _?! ISN’T THAT CHIGI-SAN?!_   MoMo jolted on the spot as she realised who that was.  _THE FUCK?!?!?!_

'W-w-w-wait!’ MoMo rubbed her eyes immediately to make sure she wasn’t seeing things, 'i-i-i-isn’t that  _your Chigi-san_!’ Her speech had been severely impaired by this moment of shock and revelation.

_Holy crap what?!_ MoMo screamed internally to herself. She couldn’t imagine how wide her eyes must be right now. Her mouth opened and closed repeatedly as she tried to form words but nothing came out.

'Erm ladies?’ The police office suddenly called out breaking MoMo’s trance, 'ready to go?’

'E-e-e-e-erm,’ MoMo stammered as her eyes alternated between the police officers, Miyu and Chigi, 'y-yes, j-j-j-just a moment please.’

Then whipping around to face Miyu again, she held Miyu firmly by the shoulders and said, 'Miyu. What should we do?’

No reply. Just sobbing.

'Miyu. What. Do. You. Want. Us. To. Do!’

Again no reply.

'Oh for goodness sake!’ MoMo threw her head back in frustration and cursed all the gods that was making her go through this.

_No no no no this can’t be happening right now._ MoMo pinched the area between her eyes while she squeezed her eyes shut.

_Fuck._

_There are still people around us. Fuck!_

_I can’t let this go on for any further._

'Fine.’ MoMo finally resolved by herself, 'if you’re not going to answer then I’ll just go over there and sort this out myself shall I?’ Sarcasm dripped from her voice as she began to walk towards Chigi-san in large strides without waiting for Miyu’s response.

As she approached, the few remaining fans had seemed to realise who her target was.

At once, they began to let out surprised gasps and squeals while at the same time taking out their cameras and capturing the moment.

_Oh fucking hell…_

_Looks like there’s going to be lots of explaining to do._

* * *

Chigi:

Chigi didn’t know whether she should stay or run. Her mind is telling her one thing but her heart is telling her another. She was aware of the fact that she probably had her mouth gaped open with a stunned expression; but that did not change the fact that she just couldn’t help but stare.

Her phone? What phone? She didn’t needed it anymore, she has already found the person she was looking for. In fact, the person was right there, right within her sight. Also the shop keeper who she spoke to had now gone. To where? She didn’t know and she didn’t care. And all of this was simply because her brain currently didn’t have the capacity to anymore.

In her subconscious, she knew Miyu must have been staring back as well but currently in her consciousness, Chigi only knew that she was the observer fixated on a person in this moment in time.

If only she could get closer, if only if she could confirm that this was all rea-

'C-Chigi-San?’

_Eh?_

Having been knocked out of her reverie, Chigi snapped back to the materialistic world and saw the individual who was currently tapping on her shoulder.

This was a face who she did not recognise.

'Err,’ the person said in a wavering tone, 'y-you  _are_  Sagiri Seina right?’ This person had an unsure look about her and part of her facial expression suggested to Chigi that she was almost… frightened?

'Y-y-yes, I am,’ Chigi stuttered out. She distanced her herself from the woman because for some reason she felt vulnerable, 'w-who are you may I ask?’ Chigi asked back.

But instead of answering, the woman just brought her hand to her forehead and began to curse something quietly under her breath.

Chigi’s eyes alternated between Miyu (who was…crying?) in the distance and this strange woman next to her. She wasn’t sure who was more important at this moment.

'Ok, ok,’ began the woman in front of her with her eyes closed and hands out, 'just give me a second, I need to work out what to do next.’ With this said, the person took in a long breath and then exhaled deeply.

_Work out what to do next?_ Chigi continued to look at her in a confused fashion now completely clueless about what was going on.

_Who was this woman?_

_What did sh-_

'Ok,’ the person suddenly spoke up, 'I’m MoMo.’  

_MoMo?_

_Who’s MoM-_

_Oh._

_Oh my god oh._

'Miyu’s personal assistant,’ Chigi whispered under her breath with wide-eyes.

'Yes,’ answered MoMo giving her a wide-eyed look back.

After that, there was a moment of pause as they both took in the information.

'Erm,’ MoMo began again, 'I know this isn’t a good time to ask why you are here right but I’m sure me and Miyu’, with this she pointed over at Miyu, 'are both  _very_  curious.’

Chigi opened her mouths a few times to speak but alas no sound came out.

'It’s ok, you don’t have to explain now,’ interrupted MoMo quickly before Chigi could say anything, 'but,’ she spoke slowly and in close proximity, 'I think the best thing to do now is for you to come with us.’

_Come with us? Go with them? Where were they going to go?_  Chigi’s mind was full of useless questions but she did not know what else to think.  _What does she mean by this?_

'Erm I’m not sure what you are sayin-’

'What I’m saying is: would you like to come over and say hi to Miyu,’ after this MoMo paused and looked at her with wary eyes.

Unable to respond to this question or even to comprehend the meaning behind them, MoMo spoke again before she could, 'I’m sure she would appreciate it.’

_Miyu would appreciated it._

_Appreciated what? That I’m going over to say 'hi’ to her?_  Chigi head spun into a state of turmoil as her heart began to pound with anxiety and fear.  _Wait hold on? Am I ready for this?_

'We don’t have long to decide,’ MoMo spoke again this time in a hushed tone, 'as you can see there are fans around with cameras right now who may I add, have noticed you, so I suggest we act as  _normal_  as possible and as  _swiftly_ as possible.’

As the words entered her comprehension, Chigi’s eyes took in the environment in her periphery. Immediately the sight and sounds of fans whispering/gossiping with excitement filled her senses as a new level of awareness entered her body.

Sweet mother of Jesus. MoMo was right.

It had seemed like the sight of Miyu had made Chigi to be completely unaware and oblivious of the situation around her.

She and Miyu can’t just stand here forever staring at each other like this, she needed to do something.

'Ok’, is the word that escaped form Chigi’s mouth, 'I-I’ll,'Chigi swallowed, 'I’ll go over.’

Almost instantly next to her, MoMo expelled out a long-held-inbreath and said, 'oh thank god.’ However after that, fear crept into Chigi’s heart causing her to remain frozen on the spot.

Slowly, Chigi turned to look at MoMo with a hesitant expression when the personal assistant said, 'w-well go on then! After you I guess.’

Still unsure about this, Chigi remained planted on her feet. MoMo, who was becoming more and more frustrated by the second, let out a 'puff’ and gestured Chigi the path towards Sakihi Miyu with an outstretched arm.

Chigi eyed the ground leading towards Miyu until her eyes fell on the person herself. Miyu’s stance has not changed and so hasn’t her expression. Gosh how she wanted to wipe those tears off her face.

_So this is how I’m going to meet Miyu again huh?_  More dramatic than she had hoped but she guessed this was what her life had become now - full of drama.

Not wanting to think anymore, Chigi closed her eyes and inhaled in deeply. Then slowly and insecurely, she raised her right leg and took a weak step forward.

She did the same with her left leg and then another with her right. Chigi continued the same process again and again until finally, she was walking with strong strides.

_Ok._ Chigi thought to herself.

_Here I go._


	19. 19

Chigi:

Step by step Chigi approached Miyu.

She was aware that there was an audience watching her yet she remained as composed as possible, both mentally and physically. She felt weak to her knees but Chigi kept her gaze fixed on her destination and continued to walk forward.

As she got closer she saw Miyu’s tear stained face which pulled on the strings of her heart. 

Three more steps, then two, then one and she was finally there. 

Chigi took in the sight in front of her as her whole body trembled with anxiety and excitement. Her eyes scanned across Miyu’s face as she took in all the features. 

_Youthful as ever_ , Chigi thought to herself, however there was one thing that was different. The naive nature that was once present in her eyes was now replaced with maturity; there was wisdom in them but most importantly there was pain. A lump began to form in Chigi’s throat as these thoughts are realised in her mind.

Just as she was about to say something, the individual in front of her leapt forwards and wrapped their arms around her neck. 

A soft yet surprised ‘oomph’ escaped from Chigi’s lips.

* * *

Miyu:

She couldn’t stop herself, she really couldn’t. 

Seeing the real Chigi in front of her was just too much. All her self-control was gone as she threw her body onto the woman she loves and swung her arms around their neck as tightly as possible. 

Then, Miyu did nothing else but to bawl into the crook of Chigi’s neck as she released her array of emotions all in one go. She pressed her forehead into Chigi’s shoulder as her tears began to dampen the clothes of the person in front of her. 

Miyu didn’t attempt to cry quietly, instead she made sure she was heard (or in fact made sure she was heard by Chigi-san), she wanted Chigi-san to realised how much Miyu had missed her and how she had longed for this kind of contact.

At once, her arms tightened round Chigi’s neck as she brought her body impossibly closer into Chigi’s front.

Just then, she felt two hands land on her hips, beginning to push her away.

* * *

Chigi:

The moment she realised what was happening Chigi froze. Chigi was not prepared for a hysterical Miyu to leap onto her. 

Just as this was happening, Chigi heard cameras flashing around them with gasps and squeals coming from the crowd. But for now, none of these things mattered.

Within seconds, she felt Miyu’s moisture against the skin of her neck and Miyu’s hot breath sending shivers down her spine. 

Chigi could feel Miyu’s ear pressed against the side of her cheek, in fact she could feel everything, her senses have been magnified to the point where her skin burnt where Miyu touched.

For a brief moment she closed her eyes as she allowed herself to be engulfed by Miyu’s warmth. She breathed in Miyu’s scent and thought it was possibly the sweetest smell to ever greet her nose. Miyu’s soft hair brushed against her flesh and she wanted nothing more than to bury her face in it.

But once again, now was not the time. Too many things needed to be said before that can happen.

Therefore, not permitting this moment to go on for any longer, Chigi brought her hands onto Miyu’s hips, beginning to push her away. 

At first there was some resistance but after few seconds, Miyu came off from Chigi’s shoulder and started to pull away.

As Miyu’s and Chigi’s face passed each other, both couldn’t help but to take in each other’s features. It had been forever since they were in this close proximity and of course, the pull that existed between them was almost impossible to resist. Yet somehow they managed. 

She saw that Miyu’s gaze hovered on her lips and she prayed that Miyu had the self-control to not jump forward and kiss her. Because this was neither the appropriate time nor the place to do it; especially in the middle of the airport surrounded by a group of people, most of whom are her fans.

'Mi-Miyu,’ Chigi suddenly found herself saying. At once, Miyu eyes switched from her lips to her eyes. 

Being so close, Chigi saw that Miyu’s eyes were red and fluffy from crying but also so full of love and longing. Realising this, Chigi swallowed and forced herself to continue speaking.

'W-we should probably find a more private place to talk,’ Chigi spoke in a low voice but of course the tenderness was still there, ’t-there is much to talk about.’

For a second, confusion flashed across Miyu’s face but that was quickly replaced by an expression of awareness and emergency. Then awkwardly, Miyu’s arms slipped from Chigi’s shoulders down to her sides while Chigi removed her hands from Miyu’s hips and cleared her throat.

'Y-yes of course,’ Miyu stuttered looking anyway but Chigi’s face. Chigi could see a flush rising quickly on Miyu’s face and a small smile appeared on the corner of her lips.

This was how it was used to be. Oh how she had missed this.

'Come on,’ Chigi said gently to Miyu, giving her a small pat on her arm, 'let’s go with the police officers.’ With this, Chigi gestured to the police officers, who had been waiting there patiently.

Miyu turned around and as if she was seeing them for the first time, she jumped slightly and let out an obedient 'はい!’

Hearing this, Chigi smiled and then looked over at MoMo to give her a look as if to say 'over to you now’. 

And just like that MoMo began, 'sorry to keep you waiting officers haha, you see, Chigi-San here is a  _very_  close friend of Miyu’s and in fact Miyu was actually flying to Nagasaki to meet her… However! We didn’t anticipate that she would be here so er, erm… I guess there’s no point in getting on that plane now haha….’ With that, MoMo began to laugh nervously and looked over to Chigi for help however only to receive a sympathetic look from the said person.

'But!’ Said MoMo suddenly snapping back to the police officers, 'we would appreciate it if we could wait in your office and call our driver…’

The police officers looked at each other for a moment but then one of them said, 'yes of course! Whatever you need.’ Chigi thought the police guy could have just said 'anything for Miyu’ because it was obvious by the way he looked at her. 

Chigi wanted to snap this guy in half but she guessed she couldn’t possibly do this to everyone who looked at Miyu in this way. No, because that would be homicide. 

'Awesome!’ MoMo said in a relieved tone next to her. 

'Cool! This way then.’ With this, the police officers gestured the way towards their station and began to walk in that direction. MoMo began to follow them after giving Chigi a relieved look.

'Miyu let’s go,’ said Chigi turning her attention back to Miyu.

Until now, Miyu’s gaze was fixed on the ground between where herself and Chigi stood. But once Chigi spoke again, Miyu lifted her head and looked directly into her eyes.

'はい!’ Another one.

Seeing Miyu’s current expression, Chigi suddenly had an urge to cry. Miyu regarded her with a face so full of trust and reliance that Chigi thought she would never be able to handle it.

She could not believe she had been given a second chance to work it out with this person. Maybe kami-sama was good to her after all.

Closing her eyes and shutting out these thoughts for now, Chigi gave Miyu a small smile back and began to walk as she followed behind the officers and MoMo.

Chigi didn’t need to look behind her to see if Miyu had followed. Because knowing Miyu, Miyu always have and always will.

And hearing the soft clicks of Miyu’s heels behind her, Chigi knew that she was right.

* * *

Miyu:

'Miyu let’s go’.

As soon as she heard this, Miyu lifted her head up and met her eyes with Chigi’s. In there, she saw safety and warmth and at once she wondered if her heart would burst with happiness.

'はい!’

She didn’t even question it, Chigi’s words were her holy scripture and everything she said, Miyu will do. Just like always, Miyu was willing to follow Chigi until the end.

After receiving yet another smile from Chigi, Chigi turned her body and began to walk after her personal assistant and the officers. A few moments of staring after Chigi-san later, Miyu began to move her own feet too.

As she followed behind Chigi, her gaze remained mostly on the floor. But, she could not help but to steal glances from the woman directly in front of her. 

Miyu’s heart pounded in her chest as her mind still tried to comprehend Chigi’s presence. Her eyes went up to look at the back of Chigi’s head, then slowly her sight dropped to Chigi’s shoulders, her arms and then finally to Chigi’s relaxed hand by her side.

Chigi’s open hand looked so inviting. Her long, slender digits were captivating and Miyu wanted nothing more than slip her own into Chigi’s palm and to intertwine her fingers with Chigi’s; to feel the warmth run through her and let herself give in into the feeling of security and home. She was fixated. 

But suddenly, remembering where those hands had been last night, a flash of pain flashed through Miyu’s heart. 

Sure, she may not have Chigi’s first, but, she was determined to be Chigi’s last. 

Now that Chigi was here, by her side, for reasons still unknown to her, Miyu will get to the bottom of Chigi’s and Seshiru’s relationship.

And then she will confess everything that she held in her heart, making sure Chigi will never leave her side again. 

This was her ultimate plan.


	20. 20

Chigi:

Now at the police station, MoMo was in the corner discussing a few things with the officers while she and Miyu sat side-by-side on the chairs present in the room. She hoped that whatever MoMo was talking about with the police officers, MoMo would get it done quickly. Chigi wanted to get out of this place so that she could finally speak with Miyu in privacy.

Having said that, Chigi currently couldn’t bear to look the person next to her. Having scanned the entirety of the room over 5 times, her gaze finally fell back on her feet which rested on the floor. And in the corner of her eyes, she could see Miyu’s form sitting next to her. The whole right side of her body buzzed with electricity with Miyu so close.

Unable to stop herself, her sight wondered disobediently to Miyu’s feet, then slowly up her legs until she saw Miyu’s clasped hands on her lap. She could tell Miyu was nervous by the way she fidgeted with her fingers. Unbeknownst to Chigi, she was doing the exact same thing.

She wanted to say something to break this awkward (yet somehow comfortable) silence. However, right now she couldn’t think of anything.

“Miyu”.

Chigi wanted to slap herself as she did not know what made her say Miyu’s name.

“Y-yes Chigi-san.” Stuttered Miyu who immediately turned to look at Chigi intently.

_Quick think of something!_

“Erm,” Chigi choked out with a mind working at 500mph, “M-MoMo said to the police officers that you were going to Nagasaki…to find me…,” almost at once, Miyu ripped her gaze away Chigi’s face and back to her own clasped hands in her lap, “so erm… naturally, I’d like to ask what you would like to see me about…”

After finishing her sentence with great difficulty, Chigi slowly turned her head to face Miyu. Right now, Miyu wore a radiant blush with her eyes widened.

Chigi could probably guess why Miyu wanted to see her.

_Had Miyu changed so much that she was brave enough to go half way across the country just to fight for her love?_

This thought brought great excitement into Chigi’s heart but at the same time she was sad. Sad because Miyu thinks she has to fight for Chigi. Because if Miyu really wanted to, Chigi would always be by her side, accompanying her till the end of their days.

“I-I”, Miyu began to say in a broken fashion, “I don-”

“Alright lovebirds, came MoMo’s sudden voice, immediately both hers and Miyu’s heads turned to see a MoMo towering over them, "I called Mr Miyazaki, and he said his taxi will be here in 5 mins. Turned out he got peckish after dropping us off so he’s at a nearby McDonalds.”

Part of Chigi wished MoMo hadn’t interrupted them, but part of her was glad that she did. Because Chigi didn’t want to hear Miyu’s heartfelt confession in some random airport police station, no, she wanted to hear it in somewhere safe and somewhere she could show her love for Miy-

“Well come on then,” MoMo said gesturing them to get up, “did I interrupt something here because the air feels very awkward right no-”

“No you didn’t,” said Miyu abruptly, “let’s go, we don’t want to keep Mr Miyazaki waiting.” With this said, Miyu jumped on her feet and immediately headed to the door in a scurried fashion.

MoMo then turned to Chigi with a confused look on her face wanting a full explanation but instead Chigi just said, “don’t worry you didn’t interrupt anything,” she paused and released a sigh, “she’s right though, we don’t want to keep your driver waiting.” After patting MoMo a few times on the shoulder, Chigi began to walk after Miyu and out of the door.

What she didn’t hear MoMo say after her was, “Gosh I hate actresses”.

* * *

Miyu:

She thought she was ready but she was far from it. Having the situation staring straight at her in the face made Miyu realise just how difficult it was to get out the actual words. Maybe it was because they were in a police station, maybe if they were by themselves Miyu would be able to say those words.

Anyway, Miyu just wanted to get out of the airport.

* * *

Chigi:

As soon as they exited the airport, a car drove towards them while beeping its horns. Turned out it was Mr Miyazaki.

Just as they were about to get in, Miyu suddenly turned to Chigi to ask, “Are you coming with us?” For a moment there, Chigi was lost for words.

_What did Miyu mean by this? Didn’t she want me to go with them? Was Miyu not happy that I was here?_

“I-I err…”

“I mean aren’t you here for work in Tokyo?” The tone and expression Miyu spoke with was difficult to read. Chigi didn’t know what answer Miyu wanted to hear.

“No…”

“We could help you call a tax-”

“Oh for goodness sake!” MoMo said in an exasperated tone, “Just get in before more of your fans turn up! Whatever Chigi-san is here for I’m sure she could sort out her travel arrangements back at your house.”

This time Chigi was definitely glad that MoMo had interrupted them.

“Yes that would be nice,” thanked Chigi in a quiet tone.

After that unexpected conversion, they all got into the car with MoMo sitting in the passenger’s seat and herself and Miyu sitting in the back.

The car ride was exactly like how it was back at the police station. The awkwardness hung in the air while MoMo made small talk with Mr Miyazaki.

Both Chigi and Miyu were staring out of their respective windows with neutral expressions which could not be said for their current states of mind. Because currently, both were planning what they were going to say to each other once they get into the privacy of Miyu’s home. But alas, both efforts were fruitless.

This was going to be a long ride.

* * *

“Thank you again Miyazaki-san!” Said MoMo to their driver, “we don’t know what we would have done without you.”

“Don’t worry,” replied Miyazaki-san with a hearty chuckle, “an old man like me has nothing to do anyway haha”

“Ah don’t say th…”

MoMo and Miyazaki-san continued their modest exchange while Chigi began to tune everything out. Her heart raced as she stared at the front door they just parked outside of. She assumed this was Miyu’s home. Just with one look, she made the conclusion that this house was the exact reflection of Miyu as a person: warm, open and cosy.

The sounds of tapping on her side of the window broke Chigi’s trance. As she focused a bit more, she realised that it was MoMo who was knocking on her window (who was already out of the car).

“Come on,” came the muffled voice of MoMo from the other side of the glass, “get out.”

Behind her, she saw that Miyu has also existed the house and was now walking towards her front door. Mindlessly, Chigi handed moved to the handle and pushed the car door open. With a push of her arms, she stepped out of the car and onto the street pavement.

As MoMo said goodbye to their driver, Chigi walked towards Miyu’s front porch with her heart drumming in her chest. Miyu has already opened her door and it was now open for Chigi and MoMo to enter. For a moment, Chigi stopped just outside the arch of the doorway. She peeked inside and began to debate whether she should enter or not.

But before she could come to a conclusion, Miyu’s face appeared in her view.  
“Erm… welcome,” Miyu’s voice was small and almost like as if she was embarrassed.

“Thank you,” spoke Chigi gently. With this, she stepped into the house and at once her senses tried to make sense of this new environment around her.

She was right, this house was the exact reflection of Miyu as a person. The walls of the house was painted with tranquil beige colour while stylish French furniture filled every room and a soft carpet covering the floor. Not to mention the smell,  _oh the smell_. It was like as if this house  _was_  Sakihi Miyu herself.

After she took off her shoes, she unconsciously began to walk into the hallway taking in the sight before her.

“D-Do you like it?” Miyu asked in a feeble fashion.

“I do,” answered Chigi almost like a whisper while looking up at the small chandelier which hung from the ceiling, “I think it’s beautiful.”

As she said the word “beautiful”, Chigi gaze dropped down to look at Miyu who immediately looked down to the floor with a blush.

“Thank y-”

“Ok kids!” MoMo’s voice suddenly came from the doorway, “I’m gunna leave you lovebirds now because I was a ton of shit to clean up.” Without even waiting for the response from the two individuals in the house, MoMo began to shut the door.

However, before she could do it fully, both Chigi and Miyu cried out in unison in a panicked fashion “WAIT!”

“You can’t leave yet!”  _I’m not ready to be alone with her yet_ , was what Chigi really wanted to say (and what Miyu also wanted to say).

Stopping her motion, MoMo said, “What? You expect the mess at the airport to clean up all by itself? I don’t think so. Anyway I believe you two have something to say to each other.” With this said, MoMo closed the door with bang and the noise echoed through the whole house.

After that, a deathly silence filled the space with only the sounds of their hearts beating in their ears.

* * *

Miyu:

_Damn MoMo! Why did she have to now!_  She could have at least waited for 10 mins for Miyu to mentally prepare herself before abandoning her.

Now painfully aware that it was just herself and Chigi alone in her home, Miyu decided it was about time to turn around, away from the door, and to face her reality which was Chigi-san.

But just as she has turned around fully, out of nowhere, two arms came to wrap themselves around her body tightly. Then after a few soft breaths brushing against her ears, a deep yet gentle voice filled her hearing.

“I’ve missed you.” 


End file.
